Thread Reader
Amy 🪄

Amy 🪄


Poisonous; a #taekookau The beta rolls over, eyes following the alpha, who walks around the room to get dressed. Taehyung looks at the clock. It is past three at night. He looks back at the alpha and sighs. “It is late.” Jungkook nods, “I know.”

Taehyung forces himself to go on his elbow, eyes on the alpha, “it is raining.” Jungkook ties the wristwatch, hums, “yeah. Best. No one will be on the street.” Taehyung bites down on his lower lip, “right. You don't want anyone to see the president leaving his fucktoy's house.”
The alpha's eyes flicker over to him, “never call yourself that, Taehyung.” Taehyung rolls over, burying his face into the pillow, “when will I see you next, Mr. President?” Jungkook, the youngest president of their country and the world, sighs, “I am not sure, really.”
Taehyung looks at the darkness, eyes focusing on it, “cannot even tell me a date?” Jungkook gives him a soft chuckle, “well, I will ask my secretary about the dates and everything. I am not sure, Taehyung.” Taehyung snorts, “it's funny how your secretary fixes our meetings.”
Jungkook sits on the bed, the mattress dips, “I don't trust my devices enough to contact you directly. You know who I am, Taehyung. You know how the media is. How the other parties are always trying to find something on me. If they figure out,” he sighs, “about you...”
“There will be too much backlash and-” “I am not worth it,” Taehyung gets off the bed, ignores how he is completely naked, “got it.” The alpha watches him go to the washroom, “I cannot stay any longer. It's already-” “Get out then,” Taehyung closes the door, “bye.”
tags - drabble (I BLOODY DAMN SWEAR) - misuse of alcohol and prescribed drugs - angst - hurt/comfort - more will be added if needed
Taehyung picks up the call in his green room, getting ready for his ramp, “what?” Jin sounds as exhausted as him, “the same suite. Tonight. Around ten. Under the name, Choi Suho.” Taehyung lets out a tired breath, “I have work.” Jin hums, “cancelled already. No worries.”
Taehyung looks at himself, “and, he did not even bother to ask me if I wanted to meet tonight or not.” Jin is quiet for a moment and then the omega lets out a tired breath, “listen, I am doing my job. Just ask him. Okay?” Taehyung hesitates, then he asks, “what number was I?”
“The first,” Jin never falters, “always.” Taehyung gives himself a mocking smile in the mirror, “there are other numbers. Right?” Jin's silence answers him. Taehyung grips the phone tightly. “How many?” he asks, curses when Jin does not answer, “how many options, hyung?!”
“Six more,” Jin hurries, “but, since he met you-” “I am going out tonight, hyung,” Taehyung speaks over Jin, “with the ones who consider me as their only one. So, tell him to choose from those options.” He cuts the call and switches it off.
It hurts to know you are exclusively sleeping with someone for over a year, just for them to have six more people stand-by. For them to put a number on you. No matter how high the number is, there is still another option. He is nothing but an option to the one who is his answer.
He dials the number and the ring is answered in two roll, “hey, tiger.” Taehyung bites back a smile, “what are you doing tonight, hyung?” Yoongi sounds thoughtful, “falling asleep in front of my television. Why?” “Let's go clubbing,” Taehyung insists, “please?”
“What is in it for me?” the rapper asks, “I-” “I will do that damn cameo in your next MV,” Taehyung promises, “please? Go out with me.” Yoongi hums, “well, fine, then. I will pick you up around 8. Be ready.” Taehyung looks at himself, “oh, I will be. No worries.”
Taehyung watches Yoongi lean against his Porsche. His black car goes perfectly with his black outfit. The rapper is wearing a turtle-neck with a bomber jacket and black jeans. His hair pulled up in a half-bun. A platinum chain hanging around his neck.
He holds his head high when Yoongi gives him a once-over and chokes. Taehyung is wearing his tightest white jeans with a deep V-cut silk blouse that is too big, it almost falls down one of his shoulders if he does not walk carefully. It shows off his diamond choker perfectly.
“Who are we killing?” Yoongi asks, rounding the car, “the same target?” Taehyung shrugs, “no target. I want to dance, get drunk and go home with you.” Yoongi gets inside the car, starting it, “not taking you home drunk, Taehyung.” Taehyung does not reply.
The club is crowded, they get inside easily and their waiter escorts them to a private booth. Taehyung watches Yoongi sit and he pouts. “I am here to dance!” he whines, “come on, hyung! Be a sport!” Yoongi sighs, “there are reporters here. Already, Tae. Come on-”
Taehyung holds Yoongi's jacket to jerk him forward, “come on, hyung,” his lips almost hover over Yoongi's, “dance with me.” Yoongi watches him, “putting on a show, are we?” Taehyung shrugs, “for those reporters? Yeah.” The alpha chuckles, “not for them. We both know it.”
The dance floor is crowded, and Taehyung likes that. When the alpha pulls him closer, and he goes easily, he knows those lenses are pointed at them. When Taehyung leans in and Yoongi lets him, he knows those cameras are taking pictures. “Don't kiss me,” Yoongi warns, “tiger.”
“You don't want to kiss me?” Taehyung pouts. There is something unreadable in Yoongi's eyes, “I would do anything to kiss you,” his hands grasp at Taehyung, “but, not when it is for a show and not when you will think of him while kissing me. I refuse to be your rebound, tiger.”
Taehyung watches the alpha, “it's just sex, hyung. Let's do it.” Yoongi smiles, “no. It's not 'just' sex to me, also,” he looks around them, “my manager will show up any moment now. So, let's not.” Taehyung leans against the rapper, hugging him close, “I love you. You know?”
Yoongi presses a chaste kiss against Taehyung's forehead, “not the way I love you, tiger,” he looks at the entrance of the club and a small sigh escapes him, “not the way I wish you would.” Yoongi watches the blond rush inside, looking around with frustration clear in his eyes.
The blond winces, too many people around him, his nose twists. Yoongi watches how the omega takes a twirl to find him, and then those eyes find those lenses. He follows them to find Yoongi and the omega halts. Yoongi holds up his hand, asking for the blond to leave them alone.
Yoongi's lips twitch when, Park Jimin, his manager, glares at him. Those lips puffing out on a pout. Then the omega goes to the bar to sit, one leg crossed over the other. Ever so poised. His eyes stay fixed on Yoongi and Taehyung. Yoongi focuses back on Taehyung.
Taehyung dances for a long time, forcing Yoongi to stay with him. Then he goes to the bar to get wasted. Yoongi drinks too, but in his limit. He has to, because the moment his manager thinks, he is overdoing it, the omega takes the glass out of his hand. “Enough.”
“No!” Taehyung whines, “come on! It's a party and we are drinking to-” “Die?” Jimin glares, “look, I know you want to and you always drag him into your shit, and he goes like a lovesick fool that he is. I get it. Trust me, I do, but you leave then, and I have to stay with him!”
“And, I refuse,” Jimin pushes the drink out of Yoongi's reach, “so, I don't know. Find another way to wallow in self-pity. Go and have sex. That's better. At least, I don't have to nurse his hangover knot or something.” Yoongi winces, “okay, that's enough. Tae, let's go home.”
Yoongi holds Taehyung by his arm around the beta's waist and almost drags him out of the club while Taehyung clings to him. There are reporters outside. Yoongi is grateful to see Jimin brought his guards, and they clear their way to the car. “I got my car, come on,” Jimin says.
“I can drive-” Yoongi stops when the omega glares at him. “One of your guards will drive your car back to your house,” Jimin goes to unlock his car, “get in.” Yoongi carefully tucks Taehyung inside and goes to round the car to sit with Jimin. “Sit with him,” Jimin sighs.
Yoongi hesitates, looking at the almost passed out Taehyung to Jimin. “Just sit,” Jimin rubs his temple, “he might fall over or something otherwise. Come on.” Yoongi does, sits and watches the omega start the car. Jimin does not speak, not a single word.
When Taehyung leans his head on Yoongi's shoulder, nosing at his scent gland for some comfort, Yoongi pulls the beta closer. He goes to tell Jimin how grateful he is for the omega to come over, but when he looks up, Jimin has already turned up the partition. Detaching himself.
“Listen, it's okay,” Hoseok, his manager, sounds a little frantic, “just ignore the news for today and avoid the internet. It will be fine, yeah?” Taehyung frowns, “what?” he rubs his temple, “is it the news of me and hyung at the club? Hyung, I knew about it and expected it.”
Hoseok goes to say something, but Taehyung is already turning on the television, and there it is. The news. 'The president of our country is tying the knot this winter. With the alpha's childhood omega friend and the CEO of the Kim Entertainment, Kim Namjoon.'
For a second, Taehyung just watches their photos on the screen. Together. In a high-class party. He watches them exchanging the rings. He thinks how, when he was getting wasted, Jungkook was getting engaged. To one of the biggest and powerful man of this country.
“Tae-” Hoseok sounds alert, “list-” “I will call you later,” Taehyung cuts the call and watches the news. He hears for himself how Jungkook announces their wedding with that wide grin on his face, explaining why the rush and how he wants to start a new year with his new partner.
Taehyung feels disgust crawl up his spine when he realizes that the party finished around eight and Jungkook wanted to meet him right after it. He was going to sleep with Taehyung with Namjoon's ring on his finger. Taehyung reaches for the bedside table blindly.
The pulls out two pills from it and chugs it down with the water Yoongi left there last night. He feels dizzy, and yet the disgust still coils in the pit of his stomach. Taehyung reaches for the bottle again, swallows two more pills before he feels the darkness consume him.
He is not sure when he wakes up but he does to the insistent ringing of his phone and Taehyung just cannot take it anymore. His head hurts, the ringtone hammers his brain. He throws the phone at the wall, listening how it cracks and the ring stops. He falls asleep again.
Taehyung wakes up again to the intercom buzzing. He hisses, rolling on his front to bury his face into the pillow. Just to realize the pillow is soaked, his face is damp. Taehyung blinks back the fog and stares at the pillow. His mind reels, the news come back in full force.
He slowly sits up and sways on his feet when he goes to stand. He walks out of his bedroom to open the door without even checking who it is. It is Yoongi. Of course, it is. “Hyung,” Taehyung tries to smile, “why are you here?” Yoongi looks tensed, “it has been two days, Tae!”
The alpha walks inside, followed by his manager. Taehyung lets Yoongi guide him to his bedroom. “What did you take?” Yoongi asks, “Tae, what did you take?!” Taehyung points at the bedside table. “How many?” Jimin asks, “shit, those are too strong!” Taehyung nods mutely.
“This,” Yoongi reads the label, “this is your second time doing this,” the alpha looks up at him from where he kneels, “for an alpha who does not give a single fuck!” Jimin and Taehyung, they both flinch when the alpha shouts. “He does not care, Taehyung! He never will!”
“You cannot do this,” Yoongi begs almost, tears barely hidden underneath that glare, “you cannot overuse your sleeping pills! You cannot drink until you empty your entire cabinet! All of this because of that guy who does not-” “Why am I not enough?” Taehyung whispers.
“To anyone?” Taehyung looks at the wall, his eyes barely focused, “why, no matter how good of a model I become, my mother looks down at me for not being enough? Why my father thinks I did not reach here because of my hardwork but because I sleep around? Why they never care?”
“Why,” his voice cracks, “my friends are not really my friends, but they just like to have me on their side for the things I can do for them? Why,” his eyes tear up, “why the one I love, just wants me because I am the prettiest thing he saw, and he wanted a taste? Why?”
“Because you are too blinded by your toxic love for a person who is not worth it,” Jimin whispers, looking away, “and, refuse to see the one who loves you more than anything in this world. You refuse to see him,” he points at Yoongi, “and, you run after an illusion, Jungkook.”
“He was out of the country,” Jimin lists, “he cancelled his tour dates to fly back here for you,” the omega grits out, “he is paying back everyone who bought his ticket because he just wants to be here with you. He loves you so damn much, but all you care about is that asshole!”
“You are worth everything,” Jimin mumbles, “you are just seeking the price from a person who is bankrupt. Not their fault.” Taehyung looks at Jimin and Jimin looks back at him. “I thought you hated me,” Taehyung snorts, “god, am I still under the fog of the pills?”
“No, I do hate you,” Jimin looks away, “but, not enough to see him hurt as much as he does when you do this to yourself. Why can't you love him back-” “You cannot force love,” Yoongi sighs, rubs his temple, “Park. Let's not do this now. Tiger, you have to see a doctor.”
“You have to work on yourself,” Yoongi holds Taehyung's hands in his, “help yourself. Please.” Taehyung looks at the broken cellphone on the floor and sighs. “I guess,” he looks back at the alpha, “I can do that.” “Also,” Yoongi gulps, “I want you to move in with me.”
Taehyung blinks, “what?” Yoongi nods, “yes! So that I can keep an eye on you. So that I can know as soon as there is something wrong. I cannot do this, Tiger! I cannot go on with my day worrying about you like this! Come and stay with me. Please?” “But,” Taehyung hesitates...
Yoongi holds his hands, “please?” the alpha presses his lips over Taehyung's hands between his, “for me, tiger. Please?” Jimin gets up from the floor, brushing his jeans, “I will be outside. Let me know whatever you decide.” Taehyung watches the omega leave the room.
“Ok-” Taehyung stops when he hears the blearing horns and sirens. He frowns, looking at the alpha and back at the door of his bedroom. “What is going on?” Yoongi stands up, looking at the bedroom door too, frowning. “Shit!” Jimin runs inside, breathing escalated, “it's him!”
Taehyung stands up by taking Yoongi's support. They walk to the balcony of his two-story house. Taehyung looks at the main gate, where the guards are opening the door. Taehyung's eyes widen, “wha- they didn't ask my permission!” “You know who he is, right?!” Jimin hisses.
The motorcade, almost fourteen cars, come to stand inside the foyer and Taehyung watches the guards walk out to go for the SUV in the middle. The beast, or the main car, opens to the president, who steps out to look at the house. Taehyung grips the railing when their eyes meet.
Jungkook looks at him with something barely concealed in his eyes, and Taehyung glares. “The one we chose to protect our security and to uphold the rules is breaking the rules of seeking permission before entering a private property!” Taehyung speaks, loud, “what a shitshow.”
- I won't drag this one or add more layers. I do want to keep it a drabble. See you tomorrow for the last part. - If you want to support me or my writing, here's my kofi :
Taehyung notices the way Jungkook's lips are pressed together. The man flicks his wrist, and the guards rush up the stairs to press the intercom again. Taehyung keeps standing, watching Jungkook. Jungkook stands too, watching him. “I will break the door if I have to, Taehyung.”
Taehyung manages a glare, “try-” “I will open it,” Jimin holds his hand up, ignores Taehyung's curse, “just don't break in, my god!” He goes to open the door, and Yoongi carefully guides Taehyung back to his living room. The president walks in with his six guards.
“Is this what happens when you have too much power at that too young age?” Yoongi asks, “why do you need six guards inside a damn house?” Jungkook ignores Yoongi, his eyes on the beta, “take a search and leave.” The guards fan out, searching the house for any threat.
“Why are you here?” Taehyung asks, feeling how his veins twist and spasm for water, he looks at the jug by the kitchen counter. Jungkook's eyes flicker over to the jug, and he picks it up with a glass before coming over to Taehyung, “Jimin ssi called to let me know.”
Yoongi and Taehyung whip around to look at the manager. The blond has his eyes fixed on Jungkook. “Why the hell?!” Yoongi grits, reaching to grasp Jimin's elbow, “did you do that?!” Jimin's eyes flicker to the rapper, then, “he needed to know.” Yoongi glares, “why is that?!”
“Because, it doesn't matter if you come to him after cancelling your damn wedding, you are not Jungkook and that makes a huge difference for Taehyung.” Jimin looks at the president, “also, I was pissed that you had to cancel your shows, this man can cancel a few meetings.”
“If you have to time to fuck him after your engagement, you have to have the time to witness how fucked up you left him,” Jimin glares. “Get out,” Yoongi points at the door, barely holding back his alpha voice, “get out and never meddle like this in Tae's business ever again!”
Jimin looks at the rapper, nods, “yeah, this is the last time I am meddling, trust me,” he looks at Taehyung, expression softening without his own permission, “just... talk, okay?” his throat bobs, “please. You cannot try to get past it if you don't talk. Please.” Jimin leaves.
Yoongi rounds to come and stand beside Taehyung, “you,” he looks at Taehyung, “do you want to do this right now?” Taehyung shakes his head, “ask him to leave. I am in-” “Sit,” Jungkook places the jug carefully on the tea table, pouring a glass of water, “you look too weak.”
Yoongi gives a short laugh, “yeah, he is weak, you know why?” he glares at the president, “because, he overdosed. There. Is that what you wanted to hear?” Taehyung winces, “hyung,” he holds Yoongi's hand, “don't petrify me,” he rubs his temple, “I don't want to tell him this.”
He looks at the alpha, “why are you here with everyone, Jungkook?” Taehyung gives a soft sigh, “I thought you never wanted anyone to know about whatever we had.” Jungkook is quiet for a moment, then he looks at Yoongi and back at Taehyung, “we can do this later. You need rest.”
Yoongi laughs loudly, “oh, my God, the audacity! You are really here to tell him what he needs?!” Jungkook's jaw hardens, “listen, I owe him an explanation. I understand you two are almost a thing, but I don't owe you shit. So, please, let me talk to him.” The room goes quiet.
“And, you have a damn fiancé!” Yoongi takes a step towards Jungkook, “who you are to marry. What's your point?!” Jungkook's eyes never waver from Taehyung, “I just wanted to talk. To you.” Taehyung looks at the alpha, “am I wasting your time by not doing that? Is there a list?”
“Are you out with your parade to go to all six of us and bid us goodbye before the wedding?” Taehyung gives a mocking smile, “shit, am I to expect an invitation now?” Jungkook's eyes bore into his, “Taehyung, I just,” he looks at Yoongi, “I am not sure I want to do this here.”
Yoongi takes a threatening step forward, and Taehyung holds the alpha's wrist. “Hyung,” Taehyung shakes his head, eyes pleading, “he is not worth your anger,” he urges, “please, give me a few minutes. I will be done. I promise.” Yoongi watches him, “you really want to do this?”
Taehyung nods, “as much as you and me, both hate Jimin for doing this, he is right,” he looks at Jungkook, “I need to talk this out and close the door on him.” Yoongi looks away, “he is always right,” his jaw hardens, “kind of hate him for that.” Taehyung lets Yoongi's hand go.
“I will be out in my car,” Yoongi murmurs, “when they leave, I will be back.” Taehyung nods, “thank you, hyung, but I think you should drop Jimin off to his apartment. He might have some work-” “He can leave on his own,” Yoongi walks towards the door, “he is not a damn kid!”
Taehyung watches the rapper go and looks at the alpha who is standing by his side. He sits quietly and Jungkook takes off his coat, drops it on the couch and comes to sit at the edge of the tea-table. He pours Taehyung some water and holds it out for the beat to drink.
Taehyung drinks it quietly, taking slow sips, “thanks.” Jungkook folds his sleeves till his elbows, leans on his knees to look at Taehyung, “is this the first time you did this?” Taehyung looks down at the glass, “why are you here, Jungkook?” He looks at the alpha's hands.
Jungkook is wearing that golden ring and Taehyung wants to throw up. “I am not worth it,” Jungkook murmurs, “no one is, cub,” he stops, coughs, “Tae, I mean. No one is. Least is me. You,” he combs his hair back, “how many times did I tell you to not look down on yourself?”
Taehyung looks at Jungkook, he cannot help those damn tears, “how long did you know you will marry him?” Jungkook's face gives away nothing, “since childhood.” Taehyung's lips wobble, “then, why…” “I didn't lie, Taehyung,” Jungkook's throat bobs, “I never said we will marry.”
“I never, not even once, lied and told you we will be anything more than what we were,” Jungkook sounds pained, “did I? Ever?” Taehyung looks away, he shrugs, “no. No, you didn't. There were six more, after all.” Jungkook closes his eyes for a second, “yeah, those... anyway.”
For a second Taehyung just watches him, “who were they?” he wonders, “I never smelt anyone on you. You never,” he chuckles, “well, of course you won't come to me right after being with them. But, who are they?” Jungkook looks down at his hands, shrugs, “not the point, Tae.”
“Are you here because you feel responsible in some twisted way?” Taehyung waves his hand, “hey, don't! It makes me feel humiliated. I don't know what I was thinking, I just,” he has no excuses, “I wasn't thinking.” Jungkook nods, “I am here,” he pauses, “well, I don't know why.”
“Jimin called Jin hyung and Jin hyung was right beside me. I heard and told the driver to turn the car back,” he frowns at his hands, “I am not sure, I just,” he looks at Taehyung, “god, you,” he swallows, “don't do this, Tae. I am not worth it! No one is. I know a therapist-”
Taehyung arches a brow, “are you implying I need help?” Jungkook nods, as direct as ever, “if you take four pills because your fuck buddy is getting married, I think, yes. You need some help.” Taehyung gets up, sways on his feet, “get out! Seriously, get the fuck out!”
Jungkook stays where he was, looking up at Taehyung, “then, tell me what you need. Tell me, how can I make sure you are fine-” “By never showing me your face again,” Taehyung stomps his foot, “by leaving me alone. Which, you can do! By just leaving right now! Please! Go!”
“I am not sure why you are angry at me,” Jungkook stands up, “why are you angry at me when it was you who slept with me after being in a relationship! I don't get it. I am trying not to pressure you, but why is this suddenly my fault that I am getting married? So are you!”
“What…?” Taehyung frowns. Jungkook nods, “yes? The first time we met, I told you that I am not looking for anything serious, and you said to not worry. That you are in a relationship and soon to be married yourself. Down the road, I figured it is Yoongi and his company agreed.”
Taehyung looks at the alpha and back at the door, where Yoongi disappears. Right. He said that. He always says that to his hookups. He used to. Till he met Jungkook. Then... Taehyung lets out a slow breath, “I tell that to the ones I sleep with, used to, I mean,” he frowns.
“That's the easiest way to let things be only a one time thing,” Taehyung rubs his temple, “but, what do you mean his company agreed?” Jungkook shrugs, “well, you didn't read the articles?” then he bites his lips, “you, well, you couldn't. So, yeah, there is a confirmation...”
“That night you two were seen in that club,” Jungkook looks away, “and, his company posted a confirmation that you two are to marry when he came back from his tour. Cancelling everything. I read that letter.” Taehyung gapes, “we are to marry…?” Jungkook stares, “are you okay?”
Taehyung throws his hands up, “do I look okay to you?! You idiot?!” Jungkook winces, “well, okay,” he holds Taehyung, “sit down. Let's not get all hyper. You don't look so well to me. Just sit.” Taehyung shakes his head, “call Yoongi hyung in! I need to know! What the fuck?!”
“Okay, you are reading the same announcement for fifteen minutes now,” Jungkook watches the rapper, “can you confirm or deny the claim made by your own company?” Yoongi looks at the phone in his hand, “I… have no clue.” Taehyung curses, “call your manager!”
“It does not change anything,” Taehyung points a finger at Jungkook, “you are still getting married. But, I want to clear out this. What the hell?” Yoongi dials the number and puts Jimin on speaker. “Did you know about this wedding announcement?” Yoongi goes directly to it.
“I saw it this morning,” Jimin hums, “the company might have told your manager.” They all share a look. “You are my manager…?” Yoongi grits, “Park, what are you-” “No, I am not anymore,” Jimin sounds tired, “I resigned last week.” Taehyung and Jungkook share a look.
“What the actual fuck are you talking about?” Yoongi growls, “you came to get me at the club. You came with me today-” “I went to the club because I was worried,” Jimin whispers, “today, you came to my apartment and dragged me out. Didn't hear a word from me. Remember?”
Jimin lets out a deep breath, “anyway, now you know. See you around, sir,” he chuckles, “your new manager's details will be in your mail. Check those from now on. Take care,” he cuts the call. Yoongi looks at Taehyung and back at Jungkook. Jungkook sighs, “so, that's that.”
Jungkook gets up, “when I got the news, it was shocking. I had to come to see you, but,” his voice thins out, “I don't know what else I can do. I don't know because, I thought you were marrying him.” “It does not matter,” Taehyung waves his hand, “we are nothing. You should go.”
“What are you saying now?” Yoongi wonders, “now that you know he is not getting married to me, now that you know we are nothing, what are you saying now?” Taehyung grasps Yoongi's shirt, “don't! I don't need to know. I don't want his pity or anything he has to offer.”
“Whatever I say now will be taken as pity or something nearly that,” Jungkook pushes his hands in his pockets, “so, I will not say anything. But, he nods at Taehyung, I came here on a whim. I exposed you to the media like this. I am sorry. If you want me to make a statement-”
“I will.” Yoongi arches a brow, “what statement?” Jungkook shrugs, “to say I came here to congratulate you two?” he makes a face, “to the public eye, you are getting married. Taehyung is the face of our country. We have met time to time and this can all be chalk up to that.”
“Yes, that would be lovely,” Taehyung nods, “I do not want anyone to know why you were here. Not when I don't know why you are here,” he gives a short laugh, “just say you came to congratulate me and that's all.” Jungkook watches him for a long time, then he gives a nod, “fine.”
Yoongi looks at Taehyung, “I will ask the company to retreat the confirmation.” “Don't,” Taehyung holds Yoongi's hand, “for now, don't. If this actually helps your career, I want to do it. What worse can happen? People will know we are getting married. That's it.”
“I will take your leave, then,” Jungkook looks at the two of them, “take care.” Taehyung watches the alpha, “congratulations on your engagement and upcoming wedding.” The alpha's face gives away nothing, just as always. He gives Taehyung a lopsided smile before leaving.
“Out of every person on this planet, why him?” Yoongi asks, pulling out his phone to dial a number, “why did you have to go and fall in love with him?” Taehyung watches the alpha leave, “wish love happened after reasoning with us.” Yoongi curses, “why won't he pick up-”
Then Yoongi pauses, “right,” he cuts the call, frowning at the phone, “he isn't my manager anymore,” he opens his phone, “that's why this new guy was calling me, saying something about management and I kept cutting his call? Like, I should really start to listen!”
Taehyung sits down, listening to the sirens and horns fade outside, “yeah, the good thing is, finally you are free.” Yoongi looks at him, “huh?” Taehyung shrugs, “you know? From the pest? You keep saying how he is always in your business and pestering you for everything?”
Yoongi sits down too, right beside Taehyung, “yeah,” he hums, “damn, we both got rid of our problems today. Huh?” Taehyung gives a short laugh, leaning back against the couch, “I think we did.” Yoongi looks at him, tilting his head, “you are still moving in with me, right?”
Taehyung watches the alpha, “yes,” he reaches to take Yoongi's hand in his, “yes, I,” he looks down at Yoongi's hand, “I want to leave this all behind and a new start will help. Right?” Yoongi nods, eager, “yes. I will get my place arranged for you. Let's move you there soon!”
Yoongi gets up, “now, you go and shower. I will cook you something to eat.” Taehyung's stomach growls at that, and the alpha chuckles at him fondly. Taehyung blushes, getting up to go towards his bedroom. “Hey, hyung?” Taehyung stops by the hallway, “thanks.”
“For what?” Yoongi asks, already pulling out vegetables from the fridge. Taehyung watches the alpha, “for always being there. Never leaving my side. Even when I closed off for you. You never shut me off. Thanks for holding on.” Yoongi looks at him then, “I will always, Tiger.”
Taehyung goes down the hallway and Yoongi gathers everything on the countertop. “Shit,” he curses, “Park has the spare key to my apartment. Now,” he pulls out his phone and dials, “come on! Pick up!” “Yes, sir?” Yoongi sighs, “Park! My apartment's keys. You have them with yo-”
“In your studio, sir,” Jimin replies right away, “the top drawer under the mixer.” Yoongi pauses, “you were to pick up the suit I am to wear for the next-” “It's already in your closet.” Yoongi cuts the veggies, “my kitchen-” “Re-filled everything last week,” Jimin delivers.
“Also, I have given the staff their salary for the next two months,” Jimin narrates, “the studio's coffee machine is cleaned and stocked. Please don't drink too much of it, though. The other things are delivered to Yushik hyung. He will take care of you, sir. No worries.”
“Who are you managing from now on?” Yoongi frowns at the veggies, “which artist? Or a group?” Jimin sighs, “I am not managing anyone,” he mumbles, “I got an offer from a writer to be his assistant. He lives in-” the omega stops, “I am boring you. Sorry. I will go now, sir.”
Yoongi freezes, “wait!” he frowns at the phone on the counter top before picking it up and off the speaker, “you are not going to be in the company?” Jimin is quiet for a few moments, then he breathes out a laugh, “peace, huh?” Yoongi grips the edge of the counter, “Park!”
“No, I am not going to be in the company,” Jimin sounds a little dull, his voice too hoarse, “Park won't pester you anymore, sir.” The call ends and Yoongi watches the phone in his hand. He dials the number, but it cuts right off. He is blocked. It is a goodbye.
“Hyung! What did you make?” Taehyung comes around the kitchen, hops on top of the counter, “I am hungry!” Yoongi blinks at the phone, still in his hand, “uhhh,” he looks at the beta, forces a smile while he puts the phone down, “just give me a few minutes, tiger.”
“Did I disturb?” Jungkook laughs, watching Seokjin and Namjoon jump to look at him, “shit, look at your faces!” Namjoon throws the pillow at Jungkook, “asshole! Knock!” “And, miss this?” Jungkook watches them hide under the duvet, “lock the door, then.”
Jungkook wanders inside the room, “did you see the ring? I lost it again.” Namjoon curses, “why can't you keep it on always?” Jungkook shrugs, “it itches, okay?” Seokjin blinks from where he is nestled against Namjoon, “and, that other one doesn't?” Jungkook ignoers him.
“I remember wearing it when we were playing poker last night!” Jungkook whines, “come on. Help me find the damn ring, I need to leave for a meeting!” Namjoon curses, “bro, we are naked under this duvet!” Jungkook glares, “we have the same body part. Just get out, get dressed!”
Jin gets off the bed, proudly naked, “don't eye my ass, Kim. Next round is for your ass.” Jungkook winces at those words, “too much information, shithead.” “Don't call me that!” Jin throws a glare at him, hopping into his jeans, “search the damn ring!” Namjoon watches them.
“Here!” Jin throws it at Jungkook and Jungkook wears it in a rush. “Get dressed, you need to come with me,” Jungkook waves his hand at Jin, “also,” he points a finger at Namjoon, “you have a mark on your neck.” “People will think you gave me that,” Namjoon shrugs, “big deal.”
Jin watches how Jungkook looks at Namjoon. He is not really looking at Namjoon. The alpha then looks away, nodding. “Right, who cares,” he shrugs, giving Jin a small smile, “hurry!” “How was he?” Jin wonders, “did they have to hospitaliz-” “No!” Jungkook is sharp, “he's fine.”
Jin takes Jungkook's hand in his, “kook, if you want, we can still come out,” he looks over at Namjoon, “no risk is worth losing someone if-” “He is fine,” Jungkook's jaw hardens, “he has his alpha with him. Don't worry, okay? There's nothing to do about it. Forget it.”
“Jungkook…” Jin hesitates, “that guy overdosed after knowing you are engaged-” “I don't think so,” Jungkook looks at Jin, “I don't think it's what triggered it. He didn't say that. He never really,” he shrugs, “he never talks to me the way he talks to that rapper.”
Jin watches the alpha, “maybe because meeting in a hotel suite for a quickie is not some heart-to-heart moment?” Jungkook gives him a small smile, “forget it, okay? I have been with him. I have seen him closely. I know him well. It's not how it looks like. We are over for good.”
Jungkook goes out of the room, “also, my life is not,” he grows quiet, “you know how things are, hyung. I don't want to drag him into all this.” Namjoon walks out of the room too, putting on his shirt, “did you tell him about the threats and all?”
Jungkook looks over his shoulder at Namjoon, “about the constant eyes on me and how the other parties and those politicians want to get rid of me?” he snorts, “no, of course not! Why would I tell him that?” Jin shares a look with Namjoon, “Kook, because… you like him?”
Jungkook waves his hand, “fix the next meeting, hyung. I am flying out of the country tonight.” “Do you want to go with me?” Namjoon wonders, “I need to go to Japan for the company's next deal anyway.” Jungkook gives it a thought, “okay, sure. See you tonight then.”
Taehyung drags his bag behind himself. The only one he is carrying with himself. The others will be sent in via loading trucks. He walks inside the first guest room and goes to sit on the bed. The room is not really decorated but Taehyung thinks maybe Yoongi didn't get the time.
While he lies down on his back, feet still on the carpet, Yoongi walks in. “Shit, not this room,” the rapper grabs Taehyung by his wrist, “tiger, I got your room selected. The first one.” Taehyung jumps, sitting up, “oh?” he looks around, “why can't I just stay here, hyung?”
Yoongi is already pulling him out of that room and locking the door, “this one,” he frowns at the lock, “is not yours.” Taehyung lets the alpha take him to another room, “who lived there?” “No one,” Yoongi is quick to answer, “just, it's not cleaned. This one is for you.”
Taehyung shrugs, settling down in the new room when he sees how clean and ready it is for him. He lies on the bed, pats the seat beside him for the alpha and Yoongi lies down too, both of them watching the ceiling. “How are you feeling?” Yoongi asks. Taehyung is not sure.
He feels hollow. There is a part of him that hoped. When the president walked inside his house, he had hoped for something to happen. He had hoped for the alpha to say something to him. Now that he is gone, it all feels stupid and he feels tired. He feels like a fool for hoping.
“I wish I could block him from my devices, and it will all be done, you know?” Taehyung turns to look at Yoongi, “but, he is everywhere.” Yoongi watches the ceiling still, in his own thoughts, “right,” his eyes don't waver from the ceiling, “I wonder how that feels.”
Taehyung watches the sunlight creating shadows over Yoongi's face, “what do you mean?” The rapper's lips twitch, “nothing. Just,” he frowns at the ceiling, “some disappear as if you imagined them. A fragment of dreams. People are weird. I am too, for even wondering.”
Taehyung squirms closer to the alpha, taking the alpha's hand to pull it up. He goes to rest his head on Yoongi's chest, letting the alpha hold him close. Taehyung closes his eyes, “I am going to move on, you know? I am going to see him on the news and feel nothing some day.”
Yoongi's palm rubs over his arm, the rapper hums in agreement, “yes. You will see him and feel nothing one day.” Taehyung wonders how it would feel. He wonders if he ever looked at Jungkook and felt nothing. He always felt something. Attraction. Fondness. Liking. Love…
Tears brim in his eyes when he thinks how it would feel to feel nothing for Jungkook. Taehyung holds Yoongi tightly when he finds himself fearing that future him. He does not want to be that future Taehyung who would not feel a thing for Jungkook. That Taehyung feels surreal.
“I never wanted to not feel anything for him,” Taehyung murmurs, face burying into Yoongi's neck, “I just always wanted him to feel it too.” Yoongi holds him tightly, his throat feeling dry, “trust me, Tiger. I know.” Taehyung feels helpless, “because you feel that for me?”
For a second, Yoongi's heartbeat stops under Taehyung's ear, and then it starts again. “Yes,” the rapper breathes out, his chest dipping, “because that's how I feel for you.” Taehyung grasps Yoongi's shirt in his fist, “I am sorry.” It's an apology. It's an answer.
Taehyung cries silently, tries to hold back the sobs wrecking through his limbs. Yoongi holds him, the rapper's eyes are watering too. Yoongi cries silently. Tears roll out from the corners of his eyes to soak in his hairline. “I know,” Yoongi murmurs, “tiger, I know.”
Taehyung sniffles against Yoongi's neck, “I wish there was a way to just switch your feelings, you know? If you are not,” he gestures, “if your feelings are not accepted in this device, you can pair with another device. You know, like Bluetooth!” Yoongi laughs, “shut up, tiger!”
“No, seriously!” Taehyung giggles, wiping his eyes, “we would be the strongest pair! Catch files as soon as we are turned on?!” Yoongi rolls away, burying his face against the mattress, “say that again, and I will block you. Oh my God!” They laugh, filling in the silence.
They laugh just for the sake of it. Because if not laughter, there will be more tears. They both are tired of it. Yoongi lies on his chest, looking at Taehyung who is looking back at him while lying on his back. “I love you,” Yoongi whispers, “without any expectation.”
Taehyung gives Yoongi a hollow smile, “I love you too,” he reaches to wipe Yoongi's eyes, “I wish it meant the same.” Yoongi nods, “I know. I know, tiger. I know.” Taehyung closes his eyes, “we can give this a try. You know?” Yoongi frowns, “what?” Taehyung swallows.
“Us,” Taehyung whispers, “give us a try. Go on dates,” he frowns when he opens his eyes, thinking, “spend some time like that,” he shrugs, “maybe with time-” “You will fall in love with me?” Yoongi fills in. Taehyung nods, “I will fall in love with you.”
Yoongi smiles, “maybe with time, you will,” he looks away, “but, I don't want to put myself through that much hope, Tiger. I am fine loving you without expecting anything. This way it doesn't hurt. The moment I start to hope you would feel the same, it will hurt like a bitch.”
“I am fine being your hyung,” Yoongi gets up from the bed, slaps Taehyung's thigh, “now, go and freshen up. I will make something to eat.” The alpha leaves and Taehyung lies there. His eyes on the door. He hates himself for being so stupid. Why can't he love Yoongi back?
Taehyung rolls on his bed, picks up his phone to unlock it. He opens the messages to see Hoseok warning him about going online. Taehyung ignores the warnings, goes online to see the articles about him moving in with the rapper. He scrolls, stopping when he sees another headline.
It's about Jungkook leaving the country with his fiancé. Some comments are pointing out how protectively the president holds the omega, and some are talking about those marks on Namjoon's neck that the omega hides by wearing a scarf. Taehyung zooms into those HD photos.
He feels like a masochist when he sees those marks on Namjoon. The omega in the process of zipping up his hoodie. It's already too late. The photos are already there and some even zoomed in on those marks. Too invasive of their privacy. Speculating how they take a private jet.
Taehyung knows how those photos are not something he should base everything on. He knows those are just some clicks to steal a moment in hours and hours of interactions, but he still cannot stop himself. Not when he sees how Jungkook smiles at Namjoon. How protective he looks.
The alpha's arm is around Namjoon right after the clip where the omega trips on thin air, clumsily walking right up to a glass. Jungkook grabs the omega, laughing and pulling him to his side, holding Namjoon's hand while Namjoon gives him a dimpled, bashful smile.
They look at each other with adoration clear in those eyes, and Taehyung feels his vision blurring. He drops the phone on the bed, trying to regulate his breathing. “Do you not feel pathetic?” he asks himself, wiping his eyes, “goodness, get yourself together!”
The news comes out next week. On the Sunday weekly. The images of the president with the supermodel. In a luxury suite, kissing, both of them in some flimsy clothes. Clearly hinting at what they were up to. A private investigation team leak the photos for publicity.
It is clear that they were hired to do this. It is very clear how they had people working behind them for this. The news break after the engagement announcement, clearly indicating the president's illicit love affairs. The rival parties start to point fingers at Jungkook.
'If he isn't loyal to his fiancé, how can he be loyal to his people?' 'He lies to his closest ones, how can we trust him to be honest with us?' 'He does not care about his family! Why would he care about the nation?!' 'He is too young, and the power is turning his head!'
Taehyung locks himself in his room. The media outside Yoongi's building, almost all the time. They call him names, tell him how he broke a home. They are asking if Taehyung got where he is because he slept with the president. The headlines are worst for him in every sense.
“I am a tramp!” Taehyung screams as soon as Jin picks up his call, “I am a tramp and I spread my legs to widen the gap of my fees from the other models. All my hard work is now down the drain, and all because your security team couldn't figure out that suite was wired!”
“How did this happen?!” Taehyung grabs at his hair, tugging in frustration, “my family,” his voice cracks, “my parents are watching the news! My photos with him are splashed everywhere. My relatives are calling them non-stop. Forget about me, my parents don't deserve this!”
He goes to the window, the curtains pulled close. He peeks through them to see the people gathered around the gate. Taehyung closes his eyes when he hears the shouts and commotion, “Yoongi hyung doesn't deserve this. He doesn't deserve his address being public for me!”
“We are working on it, Tae,” Jin sounds frantic, “trust me, we are working. We are taking notes and suing the companies-” “Can you sue someone for saying the truth?” Taehyung whispers, slowly sliding down to sit on the floor, “can you? They are not lying, hyung. About us. Me.”
“Hey, we can sue them for invading the president's privacy!” Jin grits out, “also, yours.” “A privacy where we were indeed hooking up,” Taehyung wipes his eyes, grips the carpet underneath him, “you can get justice legally, hyung, but people will never stop talking.”
Jin lets out a deep breath, “that is a risk that comes with your profession, Taehyung,” he sounds resigned, “that is a risk you took when you decided to start anything with the biggest target of the media. Don't you think? You have to stop caring about people and their words.”
“I know it's shit, but it is what it is,” behind Jin there is chaos, Taehyung can hear the shouts and people moving around, “I will do everything to get these news pulled off of the internet, but this is a backlash you knew could happen. No?” Taehyung did. God, of course he did.
“If you really think about it,” Jin tries again, “you are getting more offers to work. No? Being involved with the president, you are in demand! I talked to Hoseok and he said he is getting nonstop calls from companies to hire you! You are skyrocketi-” Taehyung whimpers, “stop!”
He wipes his eyes, “stop!” Taehyung grits out, “I know I am nothing but a wh0re to you too,” he glares at the carpet, the patterns there, “but, I did not sleep with him for these offers or shit. I don't owe you an explanation but fuck you for thinking I should be happy about it!”
“I hope you can clear out his name because surely, you don't care about mine,” Taehyung chuckles, “and, hyung, next time, try to be a little more sensitive because even a whore deserves to be treated better than the words you threw at me.” He cuts the call, letting the phone go.
Taehyung curls in on himself, hugging himself as he tries to block the thoughts and worries out of his mind. He feels his palms start to sweat, just as the pads of his feet. He knows the signs of his panic attacks, and he looks at the bedside table desperately.
His father's shouts about how he is nothing but a disappointment echo in his head. His mother's cries and complains that she has to listen to every one of their neighbours and relatives because her son is a failure hammers in his skull. Taehyung crawls up to the bedside table.
The flashes of the cameras, the shouts of his name, those judgemental words and stares crawl up his spine and Taehyung pulls at the drawer, looking for that bottle. He grabs it, opens it to pour the content in his palm. Six. Seven. Eight. He stops counting. There is a fistful.
He reaches for the water when his phone rings. Taehyung looks at the device and back at the water. He sits there, immobile, unsure. The ring stops and Taehyung turns for the water. The ring starts again. The phone screams and Taehyung wants to cut the call. He grabs it.
'Private Number.' Taehyung frowns, with trembling fingers he goes to deny the call but stops himself. Curiosity gets the best of him and he accepts. “Hello?” he can't recognize his own voice. “You are not a whore!” Jungkook's voice booms through the line, “Tae, you are not!”
The alpha sounds tensed, “whatever you are doing right now, stop. I don't know, Tae,” he sounds so out of it, Taehyung frowns, he has never heard Jungkook so frantic, “where are you? What are you doing?! Tae-” “I am,” Taehyung looks at his fist, “trying to rest.”
Jungkook lets out a dry sob, “cub,” his voice cracks, “babybear, don't. Whatever you are doing, stop. Okay? I am coming,” he sounds rushed, “I am on my way. Can you,” he gulps, “babybear, can you tell me if you are alone or not?” “I am alone,” Taehyung whispers, “all alone.”
Jungkook curses under his breath, “can you be on call for me?” he begs almost, “just hold on, okay? Don't hang up on me.” Taehyung looks at the pills, “I am tired, Jungkook,” he frowns when the pills start to blur, “I want to rest.” “Not now,” Jungkook warns, “not right now!”
“I can't do this if you rest,” Jungkook lets out a whimper, “baby,” he sounds terrified, “oh, God, I did everything to keep you away from all this. Just to not see this day and here I am,” he sniffles, “babybear, please. Please, I beg, don't do something. Don't… don't leave me.”
“I can shoulder through everything, even my own pain, if I know you are out there, somewhere,” Jungkook whispers, “doing fine. Better. I don't care with whom, just doing fine. Happy. I can do anything for that.” Taehyung closes his eyes, “I want to do fine. Let me go. Please.”
“I will come with you,” Jungkook watches the buildings pass by, he taps the partition, trying to hurry his driver, “let's rest,” he leans his head back against the headrest, “it has been months since I last felt at peace. You know?” Taehyung is quiet. Jungkook fears that.
“Talk, please, babybear, talk to me,” Jungkook bites down on his quivering lower lip, “tell me I am an asshole. Call me names. Just... talk to me. Keep talking.” Taehyung lies down on the carpet, hugging his knees to himself, “it's freezing here.” Jungkook bites back a whimper.
“I will fly you out of here then,” Jungkook promises, desperate, “let's go for a vacation. A warmer place-” “I am cold,” Taehyung whispers, “I feel cold.” Jungkook blinks, teeth sinking on his tongue, “I will hug you to myself. You won't be cold then. I will warm you up.”
“I disappointed my parents,” Taehyung whispers, “they thought I will be an alpha, or an omega,” his voice comes out frail, “they thought I will be in a prestigious job, at least. Not here,” he looks at the pills in his hand, still clutches in a vice grip, “not a whore…”
“You. Are. Not. A. Whore!” Jungkook grits out, “I always told you thi-” “Then how come I have a number on me?” Taehyung leans up on his elbow, the pills near his lips, “then how come my dad said I am?” he can smell the coating of the pills this close, “how come I feel like one?”
“There was never a list!” Jungkook closes his eyes, kicks the seat in front of him, “it was before I met you. All my hookups. All those people,” he looks at his trembling hand, “you are everything. You are everything to me.” Taehyung counts the pills, Twenty one. He laughs.
“There's a pill for every month I have known you,” Taehyung giggles, “do you think this is destiny?” Jungkook slams his hand on the partition, cursing loudly, “drop it, Taehyung! Please!” “Can you tell me how many there are?” Taehyung asks, “if I am your everything?”
Taehyung looks at the pills, counting them again to make sure, “Jungkook-” “Twenty one months,” Jungkook breathes out, “two weeks, four days, twelve hours, forty-three minutes and... nine seconds.” Taehyung stops, his eyes stuck on the pills before he snaps them close.
Jungkook whispers, “ten seconds now...” Taehyung drops his hand, the pills slipping through the gaps of his fingers to roll on the carpet. “Thirteen seconds-” Jungkook chokes, “fourteen...” Taehyung buries his face into the carpet, “how many seconds before you are here?”
Jungkook has never seen Taehyung like this. In a brown hoodie, so big on him, a pajama that is too loose and crinkled. The beta's eyes are hollow, dark circles around them. Cheekbones prominent. His hands hidden in those sleeves, hugging himself while he opens the door to him.
He has always met Taehyung in his posh parties. In his best clothes, make up done, looking stunning and invincible. This Taehyung looks defeated. Lost. Tired. Extremely tired. He looks hollow. A shadow of the burning flames that Kim Taehyung is. A flame, Jungkook is a moth to.
He walks in, closing the door behind himself. Taehyung takes a step back. “I think I do need help,” Taehyung gives him a smile that barely lifts his lips, “you were right. I-” Jungkook nods, “I will sign you up with someone if you want.” Taehyung watches him, “thank you.”
Jungkook watches the beta, “I am sorry.” Taehyung frowns, not saying a word. “For making you think you are a number,” Jungkook does not dare to reach for the beta, “for never telling you how you made me feel. For,” he reaches a hand out, “for getting engaged to Namjoon.”
a/n - I am tired of people making jokes about some heavy topics. Idc if you are trying to make light of the situation or want them to hurry tf up, please don't make 'light' of heavy things. It irks me as these are triggering topic to me and those jokes fall flat to me.
Taehyung looks at the outstretched hand like a bruised cub. His eyes furrow and he keeps staring. Jungkook holds the hand out, keeps it handing between them to gauge the beta's reaction. Taehyung looks up at him, “well, he is an omega,” he takes a step back, “suits you well.”
Jungkook takes the hint and drops the hand, “I am sorry, even then,” he watches Taehyung hug himself tighter, “I should have told you the truth. Without thinking if you would feel the same or not.” Taehyung's fingers dig into his own arms, his hug too tight around himself.
Jungkook tries to understand the triggers and the steps that lead Taehyung to complete breakdowns. It's the way Taehyung hugs himself, Jungkook thinks. It's too tight, as if the beta is trying to physically stop himself from breaking apart. Jungkook feels broken as he watches.
“If you are here because you think I need fixing-” Taehyung's fingers whiten, grip too tight around himself. “You are not broken,” Jungkook murmurs, “you don't need fixing.” Taehyung's eyes snap to his, “I was about to swallow twenty-one pills.” Jungkook nods, “I know.”
“You are just exhausted from all these pressure,” Jungkook whispers, “I know. I understand. You just need some time to breathe,” he takes a calculative step ahead, “just need to have someone who would listen to you without passing a remark. You don't need fixing. No one does.”
Jungkook holds his both hands out again, “you are strong, you can fight your own battles. Just,” Jungkook ignores how a teardrop rolls down his cheek, “need a companion to fight with you. Who understands your battle. Without trying to fight it for you. I want to be that.”
“How can you be that person when I feel like I am fighting against you?” Taehyung's lips wobble, “how can I keep fighting when it feels like all my loved ones are fighting against me?” his arms loosen the hug, “how can I fight when I am fighting against myself?”
Taehyung stumbles, “I am fighting everyone and at the end I am fighting myself. You can't accompany me in this losing battle.” “There is nothing wrong is losing sometimes,” Jungkook begs, “sometimes, we should stop and lose and just rest ourselves. You can rest for a while.”
“We should rest,” Jungkook tries to smile, “maybe run away from the battle that is life. Take some time off. Just for myself. Run away or hide, just to recharge, then come back to the battle that fucking never stops. We need to steal some moments to rest, to find peace.”
Taehyung watches him, “you do that? Run away to find peace?” Jungkook's heart squeezes in his chest, he nods, “I did,” his voice comes out hopeless, “every time I went to you. I was stealing moments. My peace. I was stealing my calm. Seeking that rest this world never offered.”
“Every time I would hold you,” Jungkook ignores how tears roll out of his eyes, “I would feel like the battle was worth fighting if my breaks are with you. Every day I would push through the battle, just thinking, I will see you again, and it will be all worth it.”
“I kept reminding myself that you will just be that, my breaks. My stolen moments from this actual life. That, you are the vacation I plan in my daily life. You will never be my life because if a vacation lasts for the rest of the life, it loses the charm. No?” he sniffles.
“My daily life, me being the president,” Jungkook's toes curl, “being Namjoon's fiancé. Always sleeping with an eye open because my life is always at risk. That life I lead and dream of the vacation that you bring. But I don't know when I lost my way back to that daily life.”
“Only to realize I stopped keeping a trail,” Jungkook walks up to Taehyung, “now I am lost, and I don't ever want to leave. Only if you want to accept me, keep me. I will stay. But, then I am exposing you to my world, and it sucks. I suck too. You would know, and I fear +”
“You will hate it, hate me too,” Jungkook cries, “and, I will not be your companion but just another face who you are fighting. That's my worst fear. That one day you will fight me and one day I will fight you too. I don't want to. I don't want to lose you to my life.”
“Because, if they know I have someone in my life who is more important to me than my own life,” Jungkook shivers at the thought, “I will be putting you up for too much danger-” “Namjoon is that person,” Taehyung murmurs, “everyone knows.” Jungkook gives a hollow smile.
“The whole world think I love him,” Jungkook nods, his throat bobs, “but, they will know I am in love with you if they see me around you.” Taehyung sucks in a deep breath, eyes wide. Jungkook pushes his trembling hands in his jeans, “I am not that good of an actor, you see.”
- See you soon x - If you want to support me, my writing, here's my kofi :
Amy 🪄

Amy 🪄

FAN ACCOUNT ꧁ Welcome to Amyungverse ꧂ °❈° ≪ TK//YM Writer ≫ °❈° 👉🏽 No translation/reposting 👈🏽 °❈° @aamyungverse °❈° header by @/hangsangloss
Follow on Twitter
Missing some tweets in this thread? Or failed to load images or videos? You can try to .