I was challenged to read the Psalms as an argument supporting depression as not sin. Each of David's lamentations end on a happy note. Now, Psalm 88 has no happy note, yet what I noticed is that David did not stop petitioning the Lord. His prayer was actually more fervent...

...and He never lost hope in the Lord. David is literally casting all his anxieties on the Lord (1 Peter 5:7), not keeping them for himself alone to deal with. Both times I was in depression was because of me thinking how awesome of a person I was. When God humiliated me...

...and showed me how not awesome I was I turned to the other aspect of pride called self deprecation and began lamenting about how horrible life is. I did not turn to God. David was a more faithful man. My father was very cruel to me and my brothers. He was an unbeliever.

He would always tell me how worthless I was, so I thought I could do nothing right. His reasoning was so that I would push myself to prove him wrong. It was worldly thinking. So, when I started to succeed at things and thrive in areas I did not give credit to God...

...like I should have. I kept it all for myself. My head got big because of my successes and I started looking down on other people as lesser than me. I was a weak Christian when all this was going on. I tried to cover the hurt that my father did to me through self exaltation.

I was regenerate in Christ and He will not suffer one of His children to walk in pride. James 4:6 says, "God opposes the proud, but gives grace to the humble." The Greek for "opposes" literally means to line up in battle array against an opponent. I was going to battle with God.

It was a battle I lost as He took almost everything from me to bring me low. It was my fault that I was in depression because of my pride. I would not repent and just wallowed in self pity. Make no mistake, depression is a focus on self over God. When I finally realized...

...how arrogant and selfish I had been, I repented. I took lesser jobs that could not pay my bills knowing that the Lord knew these things and would provide. He did. I started serving other people in need, and all of the sudden all my sorrows melted away as my will had been...

...conformed to the Lord's will. I know people have lost children, family, etc..., yet that doesn't justify self pity. It should push us closer to the Lord like David, but in many cases we just wallow in our sorrows with no hope. Christ is our hope. Cast your anxieties on Him!