One night thoughts when I imagine #yoonmin
where jm wakes up happy next to yg after spending the night together. His dream came true to have his big crush right next to him but this dream crushed when yg wakes up disgusted.
Don't mind me. I don't know what this is. Just some random idea
Jimin woke up from his sleep and a smile immediately appeared on his face. He blushed and slightly bit his lip as memories of last night hit him. He still couldn't believe that he'd slept with the boy he'd been in love with for a long time.
He couldn't even imagine it and yet he is lying down now and he can hear hyung still lying next to him as he listens to his calm breathing. Jimin quietly and gently turned to the other side and stared at his hyung's sleeping face. He still couldn't believe what had happened.
He didn't think Yoongi hyung would return his feelings. Jimin feels like he's in cloud seven.
The younger one stroked the boy's cheek with his fingertips and the boy began to wake up slightly from his sleep. Jimin smiled and waited to make eye contact with the elder.
Yoongi sighed heavily through his nose and then opened his eyes. Drifting his eyes lightly around the room.
"Good morning, hyung" Jimin said in a sweet voice. When Yoongi looked at him, his eyes winded.
"Fucking hell!"Cursed Yoongi getting out of bed.
"What the fuck did you do to me!" Yoongi growled angrily and started to get dressed. Jimin gasped and turned pale.
"H-hyung... I- we-" Jimin didn't know at all what to say. He was at a loss for words and his throat tightened. He only clenched his fingers tighter in the sheets.
"Disgusting" Yoongi hissed as if to himself but still Jimin heard. Tears automatically flowed from his eyes. This can't be happening for real. This is some kind of nightmare. Just a moment ago, this was the most beautiful moment for the younger man and now...
"H-Hyung, don't say that, please, we-"
"Don't even say a word! I feel sick to even look at you" Jimin dared to look at him. Right. Yoongi looked like he was looking at one of the grossest things in this world. Jimin seriously started to feel that way.
"Hyung" Sobbed Jimin with a broken voice "We just made love to each other. Why are behaving like this?" Cried the younger, completely broken and disgusted with himself "Hyung, everything was alright last night. Why are you like this right now. Why are you leaving?"
Jimin watched as Yoongi fastened the belt of his pants and pressed his cell phone, keys and wallet into their pockets.
"I suggest you to finally shut up" Yoongi hissed "I don't want to hear a word about what happened. It's disgusting!"
"Don't you dare spread the word about it to people, I don't want them to think I'm a freak like you"
"Hyung, please, l-let's talk calmly, please, don't leave like that" Jimin sobbed and lifted himself off the bed, covering himself with the quilt, trying to touch Yoongi's arm.
"Don't fucking touch me!" Yoongi growled, throwing back his arm from Jimin's touch "I don't want to see your face ever again. Don't you dare show yourself in front of me from now on" Yoongi growled and headed for the exit with a firm steps.
"Hyung! Hyung, I beg you, don't leave!" Howled Jimin with a scream, falling to the ground. Shaken and broken, the boy curled into a ball, clutching the quilt, covering his naked body.
After what seemed like a long time, he reached with a trembling hand for his phone+
and dialed the number of his best friend.
"Tae... Tae, can you- can you please come over, I beg you" He sobbed out, completely heartbroken.
He doesn't know how much time has passed since Yoongi left his apartment. 10 minutes, 20 or maybe 30.
He still sat curled up on the floor, with minimal hope that maybe Yoongi would come to his senses and come back but he didn't. All the while he glanced at the apartment door and waited but only burst into more crying as it was Tae who appeared at the door and not Yoongi.
"Chim! Chim! What happened! Where is Yoongi?" Tae ran up to the blond man and crouched down beside him.
"H-He left" Jimin sobbed out.
"He fucking left me, Tae!" Jimin raised his eyes at his friend.
Taehyung was shocked to see his friend's face. He had never seen him in such a state. He was shaking all over, tears everywhere, his eyes watered up.
"Chim, tell me, what happened?" He asked in a calm tone this time.
Jimin bit his lip and wrinkled his brow, chastising himself and recalling the elder's words before he left
"He- He's disgusted" Jimin choked out, avoiding his friend's eye contact "He hates me for what we did. God, I asked him 4 times last night if he's drunk!"
"He didn't even drink that much! He said, he wants it. He was saying all these sweet things to me. Calling me pretty, telling me how much he likes me, how much he
cares about me. But today- He looked at me like I was trash!" He said trying to control his breathing.
"Chim, I don't know what to say. Fuck it was your first time!" He remembered suddenly.
"It was my dream to have my first time with him. No one else. So how- how can I look at myself in the mirrow now? Knowing he hates me?!" Tae hugged him tight when he started to cry more.
/ Ok, I just thought about this scene. I don't know if I should continue this or not but if, even one person is interested then I can think about something to make yg suffer for a bit, for how he made chim miserable :c /
"Can you do me a favour and give it back to him?" Jimin abashedly extended his hand to Taehyung.
"He left it at my place. I don't dare to look him in the eye, so please...-"
"Yeah, yeah, it's okey, I'm gonna do it"
He quickly took it from his friend before the blond had time to cry again
"Thank you. I'm gonna- I'm gonna head to my dance classes" Tae nodded and escorted his friend away.
Jimin tried to focus on the rehearsal and not think about what happened the day before.
He messed up a few steps and couldn't focus 100%, but occupying his thoughts with something and being tired allowed him to distance himself a bit from unpleasant thoughts.
"Jimin-ssi! Jimin-ssi!" A breathless boy ran into the room, while the group was just having a break.
He seems to recognize the boy from one of the shared culture classes, nevertheless, he is surprised that the boy had any reason to come here.
"Yes?" Jimin spoke up, looking discreetly around the room.
"Your friend- Taehyung-ssi" He exhaled.
"What- what about him?" He asked worriedly.
"He got into the fight!" Jimin threw his towel on the bench and ran along with the student.
"I recognized him as I walked across the other side of the campus. I know you two are friends, so I thought of you-"
"You did well, thanks. Where is he exactly?"
It was a long way to get to the part of the university where the older students had classes. Therefore, the only positive out of all this was that he could avoid Yoongi as he moved through the university.
When they finally reached the gathered people, Jimin squeezed through them and saw Yoongi on the ground and how Tae was punching him in the face. Yoongi, however, was not too concerned. Even though his lip was already cut, he was still able to laugh at every punch.
But before Jimin could separate them, the positions changed and it was Yoongi who managed to hover over him and hit Taehyung really hard. Frightened Jimin, that Taehyung might have been seriously bruised by his problems, he mustered the strength to throw Yoongi off his friend.
"What the hell are you doing?!" Said Jimin in Yoongi's direction, helping his friend up "Let me see" Whispered Jimin, lifting himself up on his toes to look at his friend's bruised cheek.
"He started it. But you know better. You're the one who sent him here" Yoongi growled.
He silently cursed while wiping the blood from his lip with his thumb.
"Oppa, are you okey?" Some random girl come up to him.
"Let's get you to the nurse" Jimin spoke up to Taehyung and the boy who informed him of the incident came over to help Taehyung keep his balance.
"You, follow me" Jimin heard Yoongi and right away the guy pushed over his shoulder, walking away with a confident step.
"Chim, you don't have to" Taehyung spoke up.
"I will be okey, I will catch up with you" He nodded and followed Yoongi.
He slowly followed the elder, from whom there was so much anger that Jimin did not know what to expect. They arrived at an empty hallway, where it doesn't look like anyone is about to pass through. Jimin uncontrollably trembled slightly, tangling his fingers nervously.
The silence on Yoongi's part was even more disturbing.
"What have I told you?" He finally spoke up, with anger in his voice "I don't want anything to do with you. That includes, you sending your bestie to defend you"
"Why?" Whispered Jimin "Why, hyung?"
Jimin raised his red eyes at him, fighting with himself not to cry "Did I hurt you that much? Tell me and I'm gonna fix this" He said in a broken voice, slowly losing to tears "We were good friends until now. I don't understand how could you react like that, that morning?"
"Do you hate me that much? Do you feel that disgusted with what we did?"
"Shut the fuck up! I don't wanna hear it" He moved closer "You have to idea how long I was washing myself when I got to my apartment that morning! To think how many dicks went through you, makes me sick"
Tears won. Warm tears ran down Jimin's cheeks and he lost hope of controlling them. The hurt that he felt, turn to physical pain in his chest and gosh it hurt so much.
"Please don't say that" He sobbed out "Don't say any more, the more you say, the more-" Jimin bit his tongue
"The more what, huh? Are you feeling offended for me calling you a slut? Gosh you're so sensitive. And why the fuck are you even crying?!
"Because the more you say, the more it makes me regret of falling in love with you" Jimin said bravely.
What else does he have to lose? Nothing. So let him just get it out of him and get it over with. It's clear that he can't fix anything here so what's the point anyway.
"Are you fucking kidding me? Getting fucked make you think some stupid shit?!"
"I can't control it, hyung. Not yet, at least... You scream at me, but I'm still in love with you, you push me away, I'm still in love. You hate me and I'm still in love with you. and yes, it hurts so damn much" He sobbed.
"You didn't have to accept the fact that I'm into guys, you didn't have to accept my feelings- but there was really no need to hurt me that much. For you, I'm just a trush right now but you will never know how happy I was to wake up next to you. For me it wasn't just sex"
"It was me, convincing myself again, that my feelings for you are real. And you showing me that you're completely disgusted with me, make me feel now, disgusted with myself too. But the night before, you made me the happiest person.The words you were saying, felt like a dream"
"But now, that I see nothing more than hate in your eyes, I have to let go of that dream. Because you will never look at me the way you looked at me that night" Yoongi gasped slightly but soon clenched his jaw and fists.
"You're done?" Yoongi asked in a cold tone.
"Don't worry, hyung. I will get over you and I will fall in love again with someone else. I'm still young, right?" He said trying to smile, wiping his tears quickly, ready to run away from this place because the pain in his chest is too strong, he needs air.
"I will not show myself to you from now on. So don't worry. I just sent Tae because you left your watch at my place. You didn't want to see me so I sent him. anyway, please, put some ice on your lip, otherwise there can be a scar" Jimin bowed and ran out of Yoongi's sight.
Yoongi walked closer to the window and let out a breath of air, which he unexpectedly sucked in, while listening to the younger man.
"Why the fuck you still care about me after how I treated you" He whispered to himself, leaning his forehead against the window.
/ Chim Chim ;-; Oh I'm ready to make Yoongi lose him mind in the next update /
where jm wakes up happy next to yg after spending the night together. His dream came true to have his big crush right next to him but this dream crushed when yg wakes up disgusted.
I WILL CONTINUE TODAY
In the upcoming part:
Punch right in the face.
It's the first thing he received, crossing the doorstep of his family home.
The only reason why Yoongi still comes here is for his mother. His father hates him. It's always been that way since he was a little boy. Mother is afraid of his father, though as far as he knows, he has never raised his hand against her, unlike at him.
"Where the fuck did you spend the night the other day?!" His father growled.
Yoongi turned his bruised cheek and recognized another wound on his lip. An early one from this Taehyung kid, a few hours later from his father.
A wonderful day, indeed.
"F-Father went to check on you and you were not at home the whole night" His mom spoke up. Yoongi snorted, touching his injured lip gently.
"Am I not living alone as an adult? I have to report to you everything?"
"Don't talk back, you little shit!" His father slapped him.
"H-Honey!" The frightened mother jumped up "Calm down. We can talk with him calmly"
"Calm down?! It's impossible to talk calmly with him! Ungrateful kid! Where have you been and who have you fucked?! A girl or some dude, as before?!"
His father pushed him against the wall. Yoongi fell silent, lifting his eyes to his father.
At that moment, he couldn't be brave. Memories from his childhood appeared in front of his eyes and he could not control his weakness anymore.
How his father burst into the room of 14-year-old Yoongi, who was sitting on the bed with his friend, experiencing his first kiss with a boy, being shirtless.
He threw his friend out the door, throwing insults in his direction that no teenager wants to hear.
It was the first time, a beating left marks on his body. His father locked himself with Yoongi in his room and beat him up enough to get a medical leave of absence from school for a week, explaining that he had fallen down the stairs.
Mother could only barge into the room, hearing her son's screams and cries, and could do absolutely nothing about it.
After father was done, he threw teenage Yoongi into the basement, with no light, no water, no food, and kept him there the entire 24 hours to "teach him a lesson"
To this day, he hasn't been able to forget it. More than once he wakes up all sweaty from nightmares.
No matter how often he slept with girls, his thoughts were still filled with the memory of his first kiss- with a boy.
"I-I didn't do anything" Yoongi whispered, suddenly submissive.
He felt like he was 14 years old again. Mentally, he pounded his head, trying to erase the memories of the night he spent with Jimin because, yes. It quickly came back to him and he remembered everything.
He should forget because that's not acceptable, right? It's disgusting, it's not natural. He should, feel disgusted with himself and yet-.
"Remember this, boy! If ever, I hear or even think that my son fucks guys' asses, you will regret that you were born!"
"I will end you, you cock sucker!" He shouted and walked out of the house.
Yoongi had legs like jelly. As soon as the door slammed, Yoongi slid to the ground, his hands trembling and his throat tightening causing him to have a slight breathing problem.
"Sweety- honey, let me look at this" Mother, in her quiet voice, squatted in front of her son, raising her hand to touch him.
"No, don't touch me, don't touch me" He quickly objected "Just, don't" He whispered.
"I don't want to be touched, okay?" He said in a trembling voice.
"Okey-" Mother whispered "I will drive you to your apartment. While the father is not coming back. And you will rest, hm"
/ I will be back in a day or two. I would love to know if anyone still remembers this sad story! Let me know what you guys think about this update and what would you like to see happen next, I'm curious, about how you see it!
"Your dad?" It's the first thing, Namjoon asked, when Yoongi opens the door and sees his friend, late at night. Without a word he walked deeper into the apartment, Namjoon hurries after him, closing the door.
"Did he find out about you and Jimin?"
"Don't" Yoongi interrupted him, in a threatening voice. He was serious "I don't want to hear that name, so just don't" He said pouring himself a glass with a decent dose of alcohol.
"Why not, Yoongi? Why not..." Namjoon sighed "We both know that you like-"
"Namjoon, stop!" Yoongi suddenly raised his voice "Don't you understand that this day was too fucked up for me to handle more! Just drop it, please!"
Surprised by his friend's voice, Namjoon slowly approached him
"Okey. Let me just take care of those" He said, meaning the wounds
Jimin let Tae drag him to the bar, where Kook and Hobi were already there.
It's been a week since all this shit happened and Jimin can't say he's over it, and no, the thing is not that Yoongi doesn't reciprocate his feelings, it's not that he doesn't accept his orientation.
The thing is, that Jimin remembers that facial expression all the time and can't erase it from his memory. The hate and disgust that Yoongi showed him were harder to deal with than he expected.
Going to the bar was a lot to take for him. For the first time ever.
He had the feeling that every pair of stranger's eyes, were directed at him. Judging him, mocking him.
Come to think of it, Yoongi did really say some pretty fucked up shit and Jimin can't forget it, considering that it was said from a person for whom he still has deep feelings.
Still, he felt uncomfortable in a bar full of strangers but wanted to make Taehyung happy after standing up for him. He didn't like that Tae started a fight with Yoongi but still appreciated the efforts to defend him.
After a while, the bar kicked up.
More people appeared on the dance floor, more alcohol was poured, and it began to resemble a club rather than a regular bar.
"Excuse me?" Someone came up to their table, leaning over to Jimin "Would you like to dance with me?"
He was cute, not bad looking at all but he's not here to interact with strangers.
"I'm sorry, I'm not in the mood for dancing" Jimin tried to be as polite as possible but he still didn't know how to turn this guy down while being polite.
"Oh, one dance... I will keep my hands to myself, I promise" The guy showed him a smile.
"I really don't think, that's a good idea. I'm sorry" Taehyung discreetly poked his friend to encourage him but it won't convince him.
"Well, I can't force you, can I"
"What about you?" The guy turned to Taehyung.
"O-Okey" Tae a little shyly, took the guy's hand.
"What-" Jungkook choked out quietly, seeing the couple walking away.
"You know, if you really like Tae, why don't you just tell him?" Jimin smiled at Kook.
"Jimin is right. You're crushing on Tae since you met him" Hoseok added.
"That's not that easy! And you should know exactly what I mean by that, Jimin!" Jimin's smile changed to a rather sad one. A smile that indicated that Jungkook was right.
"It's not the same, Kook. You're gay. Tae is bi. You know you can ask him out and he will totally agree"
"You're not making any sense!
"Look, some guys are just straight and hate our guts" Jimin laughed without any fun "That's why, I'm telling you, go for it. Ask Tae out"
"Not everyone is willing to date people like us, just because, we like them. Therefore, take advantage of situations where Tae probably wants you as much as you want him. And don't make excuses using me. I'm in a completely different situation. We can't always have what we want"
"Jimin... Is there something wrong? You talk differently" Hoseok noticed.
Practically everyone on campus knows that Jimin is gay. He doesn't often face negative comments, his parent accepted him right away but realizes that not everyone is so supportive.
As for Yoongi... his friends know that he has a crush on him but only Tae knows what happened and how deep his feelings are- how much the elder hates him.
"You've been crushing on Yoongi for a good year now and you're telling /me/ to man up and ask Tae out?!"
"It's not the same, Kook. I told you that before" Jimin whispered.
"Oh, you can change it now. Hyung is here" A cold shudder went through his body as he saw Namjoon and Jin head to the bar, ordering drinks. Behind them, Yoongi with some girl at his side.
Jimin quickly lowered his gaze to avoid being noticed by the elder. He is sure that another long-expression on Yoongi's face, will be the critical limit to the younger man's emotions. Another dose he is sure he will not be able to control.
He panicked slightly and looked around discreetly to find Taehyung in a group of dancing couples.
He has done such a great job of avoiding Yoongi for the last week. He didn't show himself to the elder once like he wanted to and now he doesn't want it to be any different either.
"T-Tae?" Jimin interrupted the couple in their dance and took his friend aside "C-Can you take me home?
Y-Yoongi is here" He said nervously.
"H-He just came in. P-Please. I don't want him to see me"
"Yeah... Yeah. Let's get out of here"
"DON'T TOUCH ME!" Whole bar seemed to go quiet and looked at Yoongi, who shouted at the girl next to him, who was probably trying to touch him. Jimin trembled at his shout. He was reminded of the morning when Yoongi shouted in his face how much he couldn't bear to look at him.
"O-Okey, let's go," Taehyung whispered, patting his friend on the shoulder. Jimin returned to the table to take his friend's jacket and say goodbye to the others.
They tried to leave the bar unnoticed, which was pretty easy because even though they would have to walk close +
to the bar where Yoongi is, there are too many people in the bar, so it was easy to blend in.
It's just that a small group of people started a light push and a large mug of beer spilled on Jimin's shirt, drawing the attention of people close to him.
It'd been nothing but it was a whole mug, shirt was soaked with smelly beer.
Jimin automatically raised his eyes to find Yoongi already looking at him.
Through the fog, Jimin heard the stranger apologize to him for the incident but Jimin didn't think, just ran to the bathroom.
Instead of taking care of his shirt, Jimin leaned over to the sink and splashed his face with cold water, trying to calm himself down.
In a moment, the door slammed loudly, and Jimin jumped up. He saw Yoongi in his reflection in the mirror. Jimin immediately lowered his gaze.
Yoongi started checking each cabin to make sure they were alone. Jimin didn't know what could happen at all. He was even a little scared. He didn't expect Yoongi to follow him.
"I didn't f-follow you to the bar, hyung" Jimin whispered when the silence was too hard to manage.
"I'm sorry" He whispered, this time his voice weak, full of pain and despair. What the hell had it come to? That he ended up having to apologize even for his presence, for his existence.
"For what?" The cold voice of the elder filled the room.
"For seeing me" Jimin's voice trembled, broke, still not lifting his eyes to him "I-I didn't mean to"
"Look, I only came here to tell you that I want you to forget that night. Forget that I ever been at your place, forget that we ever fucked, forget that I ever-"
"Please don't call it that" Jimin sobbed. It's impossible to hear those words again.
"I-I'm not used to using such words. Especially, when it comes to you, hyung. So please, don't call that night like that. It meant so much more to me"
"Jimin, for fuck sake! Stop it. Do as I say!"
"Maybe you won't believe me, but it will really be better for both of us if we consider this night as a mistake" Yoongi said. Jimin's eyes pinched from tears but he tried to fight them. Silence filled the room. Jimin didn't know how to react to it.
How could he forget that night? His first time with the person he is in love with. It's not possible.
"Do you understand?" The harsh voice reached the younger man's ears again. Jimin nodded uncertainly for a moment, fighting tears harder and harder.
He soon caught something in his hands as it landed in his direction. It was Yoongi's jacket.
"Take it. I don't want it back so don't come to see me to give it back to me" Jimin dared to raise his voice at him but only saw his back, Yoongi was ready to leave.
"H-Hyung, can we really not continue to be friends?" Tears won and ran down his cheeks, infecting his voice, which was torn and in despair. Yoongi tilted his head slightly to look over his shoulder but did not answer, leaving Jimin alone.
/ If we want ym to be the endgame, I have to do sth for yg to be a better person for jm. Even if yg had his reason, he's still an asshole for jm. Small steps, hm? I already know a big step that will show that jm is not really indifferent to yg but before that, we have this yg
Jimin focused on dance. In addition to the theoretical exams, a practical exam in his choreography of ballet and art dance was coming up. Spending hours practicing helped him not to think about Yoongi and their last meeting a few days ago.
Maybe it's high time to admit that he needs to move on, forget about the feelings he has for him and focus on his achievements, maybe try to meet someone soon and be happy.
Because now, being in love does not immediately mean one is happy. Jimin realized that.
Things don't always go our way; sometimes we love without being loved back, which hurts.
But we can't force the other to love us back. No matter how much we want it.
Just like with Yoongi.
No matter how many nights he has cried, feeling uncomfortable in his own bed, he can't do anything about the fact that Yoongi doesn't return his feelings.
Real life is not like a movie, like a fairy tale, that by some miracle feelings will suddenly appear in the other person.
That's why Jimin decided to let it go.
To let go of the feelings that keep him thinking that maybe one day, Yoongi will come with a big bouquet of flowers to see Jimin, watch his performance, and say 'I'm proud of you, love.'
He always had that dream of having someone by his side, cheering for his achievements, to be a part of his life and success.
Maybe not yet... maybe in the future...
Sweaty bodies. Their skin, hot as if they had a fever. Bodies rubbing against each other. Heavy breaths on their skin. Tired eyes, hair a little wet from the sweat. Heart, beating like crazy, muscles tense yet relaxed.
Through the fog, one can hear the younger's sweet moans.
Nails digging into Yoongi's back.
"Yoongi!" Jimin's moan awoke Yoongi from his nap. His forehead was sweaty, his heart was pounding, and his breath trembling.
He looked around and quickly remembered that he passed out on the couch. He rubbed his tired eyes, cursing silently under his breath.
Why the fuck he can't forget about that night. It hunts him to this day and can't stop thinking about Jimin's naked body beneath him.
He lifted himself up slowly pouring himself another glass of whiskey that he had taken before sleep.
The sound of the code being typed into the apartment, made him put the glass down on the table. He sighed heavily as he knows only one person who +
has the audacity to enter his apartment without even knocking. He stood up, turn around to face his emerging father. He clenched his teeth and bowed to him.
He doesn't do that in front of his mom. But father has long shown his superiority and wished for respect from his son.
The man looked around the apartment, just looking for something to complain about. Yoongi knew this. More than once, his father shows up unannounced at his apartment and always finds something to start a fight.
"Tomorrow you are to attend a dinner at home. My colleague will be there, and you're expected to be too"
"I can't. I have work to do" Yoongi said.
"This shitty music you make?! Just because I let you study this shit, doesn't mean you will waste your time on that!"
"You will take over my business anyway"
"Let me? I've decided to do it, I want to do it, and build a career through it. I'm not studying it just to have a mere document. It's always been my dream to do music!"
"Dream? You were meant to take over my business! And you will do that! That's my final answer. You will come home tomorrow"
"No" Yoongi suddenly said.
"What did you say?!
"I said no. I won't come tomorrow. And I won't take over your business. I will create my own career"
"You little-!" The man growled.
"Dad, you've always hated me. Since I was little, you were my enemy and I was yours... But that's enough, dad. What have I done to you, for you to not love me, like a son? Always ordering me around. Taking your anger at me..."
"You ungrateful shit!" He growled, approaching him firmly "How dare you talk to me like that! This?!" The man takes the half-empty bottle of alcohol that Yoongi was consuming "This and all you have is thanks to me, thanks to my money!"
The man shouted, smashing the bottle under their feet. Yoongi trembled slightly and clenched his fists.
"I owe you nothing, dad"
Slap in the face.
Yoongi didn't even react.
"I just feel sorry for mom, that she's still with you. She deserves way better"
This one, way harder. For Yoongi it wobbled slightly with darkness before his eyes.
"I wish you weren't my son!" He shouted, storming from the apartment.
Yoongi stands at the spot for a few more minutes after his father left.
It's not the first time he's heard such words.
Since he was a little boy, he has been telling him that he dreams of having another son, but somehow it hits him every time.
"Hyung?" His friend's voice brought him back to reality. Yoongi lifted his gaze to Namjoon and Jin.
Yoongi didn't even hear anyone enter.
"Y-Your dad left the door open" Jin spoke up. Yoongi smiled slightly.
"What are you guys doing here so late?" Namjoon and Jin looked at each other, concerned about Yoongi's condition, how he pretends that everything is okay, +
as they both heard what his father shouted at him. It was worrying watching Yoongi calmly crouching over a broken bottle and slowly picking up the broken glass.
"Sit down guys, I will just clean it" He said without emotion.
They both know that the best for Yoongi is not to start this topic. Yoongi will sooner or later speak up anyway, but only when he is ready, so they have learned not to dig into the subject when Yoongi is not ready.
Yoongi cleaned up the glass and washed up the spilled alcohol and soon joined his friends, who were sitting close together on the couch.
"So... What's going on?" Yoongi asked, trying to act normal.
"Um, we would like to talk to you about something important" Jin started.
"We thought it would be best if you were the first to know about it. Maybe then it will be easier for you to accept it if you hear about it from us personally. You're our best friend. It's important for both of us, to have you by our side in this"
"Did something happen? You both look like you're tense..."
"We just hope, you won't look at us differently" Jin said
"Come guys, I won't bite!" Yoongi laughed quietly.
"Me and Jin hyung are together" Namjoon spoke up.
Yoongi fell silent.
"We're in a relationship. We're a couple" They carefully watched Yoongi's reactions, although not much could be read from him, so Namjoon continued.
"I fell for him first- and then I confessed after some time... He wasn't ready but agreed for a date"
"We- should have told you about this before but we didn't know if we would work this out but-"
"I fell for him too" Jin continued "I'm happy with him. We wanted to tell you when we are official"
After that, silence sounded for some time.
The couple waited for Yoongi to say something. Their hands met and they waited.
"What is it to me?" He whispered. He didn't want to sound harsh, but he thinks, it came out that way "What is it to me that you are- together?" He nervously tangled his fingers.
"Why the need to tell me all this- why the need for this whole- show? Coming here, and telling me something that doesn't conserve me"
"We just know, you have a problem with g-"
"I don't have!- a problem with gay people!" Yoongi raised his voice, irritated.
"Why did you even think that I have?!"
"Yoongi, calm down. We just want to be honest with you" Namjoon said
"Considering what happened between you and Jim-" Jin added.
"I didn't care he was gay! I knew about it long before and I was friends with him anyway"
"I don't care if I'm surrounded by gay people! As long as they keep their hands to themselves"
"But you slept with him" Namjoon whispered.
"And I regret it! So fucking much. And don't worry, I'm paying for that now. Anyway, why is the topic, moved to me?!"
"Why don't you focus on yourself, being happy and whatever, and just stop bothering me about this stuff! You both are still my best friends but I just don't want to talk about it. And I don't want you to mention Jimin again, okay?!"
"Yoongi, why torture yourself like that? If you don't like Jimin that way, it's okey, but you both were friends before all this and you hurt him, really badly"
"You think, I don't know that?!" Yoongi got up from the couch, raising his voice.
"You think I did that to pleasure myself?! You think I'm like my father, enjoying seeing someone in pain?!"
"We didn't say that" JIn whispered.
"But you thought about it! Why am I surprised, I'm his son after all! But you're wrong!"
"I didn't lash out at him for my own good! I did that for HIS own good. He will meet someone who is fully accepted by himself, by his family... and I'm NOT this person"
"Hyung, you have us, we will help you-"
"Don't you still understand?!" They both looked at him.
"IF my father finds out, he will lose all his patience. If he sees Jimin anywhere near me- nothing will stop him because he will do the same as with the boy from my childhood or way worse. To this day, I don't know where he is"
"The next day they informed me at school that he had left with his family. Think, what he will do when he finds out about Jimin! You still want me to be friends with him?! After everything that happened between us?! I'm scared, okay?! I-I'm fucking scared!"
"Hyung, how long will you put up with this? What your father is doing, it's not what a parent should do"
"What do you want me to do?" He waved his hands, tired.
"He's my father. Not some random person. Mom is too scared to divorce him... What would divorce give, anyway?"
"The damage is done. It was done all those years ago when he locked me up in the basement. Alone, scared, and cold. I don't know how long I screamed and cried for him to let me out but he didn't do it anyway. He called this discipline..."
"I can't make him disappear. What I can do is make him, focus only on me. I can't bring another person to this chaos, not again. So, please, don't convince me to do anything. And with Jimin- you are seriously exaggerating. I don't like him like that..."
"I don't want to give him mixed signals. We just- slept together, there was nothing deep about it" He laughed like a madman, rubbing his tired eyes. Jin and Namjoon, nevertheless, looked at him with concerned looks.
"So, I'm happy for you both, but I'd appreciate if you didn't bring up the subject anymore. I'm sorry, I don't want to send you out, but I'm fucking tired" He swallowed his saliva hard as if his throat started to slowly clog "You'll see yourself off, right? I will get some sleep"
/ I didn't think, further in the story when I started it
Just know that yg is not in love with jm at the moment, there is a physical attraction; confusion but not deep feelings. Just having a soft spot for him. As for jm, he really is in love. In his perfect image of love /
Yoongi neither went home as his father told him to nor gave up his career path. He continued to work hard at the university and worked at home as well.
Fortunately, his father did not pay him a visit during those few weeks.
His mother only occasionally calls and says that his father is waiting for Yoongi to come and apologize to him himself. Each time, he tells his mother that there is nothing to apologize for but apologizes to her each time for being in this situation.
Everyone seemed to be getting back to normal. There was still tension with his father but he tried to avoid any contact with him, focusing on the upcoming exam. He met with friends and went out to parties. Everything was starting to be normal if, for heaven's sake,+
Yoongi hadn't chosen a different hallway on campus.
Some strange force compelled him to stop and look through the open door of the dance hall.
He recognized Jimin in the reflection of the mirror. As he thinks about it now, he actually never seen him dancing before.
Now Yoongi already understands Hobi, or let's even say Jungkook as they talk about dancing. About Jimin's dancing. This is not to be described in words, it has to be seen. Yoongi has never been good with words, so he can't express what he sees now.
How about one thing?
His dance is just pure and beautiful.
This is nothing surprising. Anyone would agree.
"May I help you with something?" A girl appeared next to him "Are you here for someone from the dance group?"
"Um, n-no, sorry... I was just passing by" The music from the hall quieted down, so it was high time to get going.
"Soojin-ah, that's you?" The girl heard Jimin, so she entered the hall.
"Hey, how's the choreography going?" She smiled.
"Much better actually. I've been practicing a lot recently"
"I've seen that. Remember to take a rest from time to time, hm?
"I will, I will" He laughed with the intention of playing the song again.
"Oh right, is there someone you were perhaps expecting?"
"There was a guy outside, it seemed as if he was waiting for you"
"A guy? Who?"
"Jimin-ah!" Someone entered the room.
"Oh, Yeonseok-ah!" Jimin was surprised to greet the guy with whom he sometimes has classes "Oh, was it you that was waiting for me?" Jimin asked.
"Actually-" Soojin started.
"Yes! I was thinking, maybe- we will get lunch together?" He proposed, interrupting the girl. However, Soojin did not think about it in too much detail and shrugged her shoulders, leaving the room.
"Um, actually I planned to practice more-"
"Come on, just take a break, hm? Pretty please!"
"Sure, okay" Jimin laughed "I will just- change real quick"
Yoongi booked the studio that day at the Uni. He got motivated to work, so he didn't want to miss it and got to work.
However, he growled clenching his hand tighter when someone started knocking insistently on the door.
"I booked the room for 3 hours!" He called out opening the door. Taehyung was on the other side. Both of them were slightly surprised but did not show it.
"I booked next. Your time is up so hurry up, I have to work too" Burbled Taehyung, stepping inside, and poking the elder with his shoulder.
"Yah! I'm not done yet. Get out!" Taehyung ignored him, peeking at what Yoongi was working on now "Yah! Don't look!"
Yoongi quickly closed the screen, displaying the lyrics of his new song.
"I don't care much, anyway" Tae replied, sitting down on the couch, and waiting for Yoongi to finish and make way for him.
Neither of them spoke a word. Although they used to run into each other often when Yoongi and Jimin were friends, now, Taehyung has no reason to be nice to the older.
Yoongi finished in 15 minutes by saving everything on his disk and, wanting to leave without a word.
"I can't stand looking at you without wanting to punch you" Taehyung mumbled out. Yoongi sighed tilting his head back, stopping just at the doorway.
"What's your problem? Want to start the fight again?!"
Yoongi turned to face him.
"Even if I wanted to, Jimin asked me not to do it again. Him and his good heart" Tae snorted "He's still so naive and think, you're a good person. But you're just trash in my eyes"
"You little!" Growled Yoongi came up firmly and grabbed the younger by the material of his shirt.
"Go ahead, hit me! This will only confirm the fact that you are trash and confirm that you yourself agree. Honestly, I don't know what Jimin sees in you!"
"Why do you care so much?! Are you into him or something?"
"If someone breaks my best friend's heart, of course, I care"
"Why do you all, make such a big deal out of it?! Get off me finally, okay! He's a grown-ass man, he will hook up with someone else soon and he will forget that he was rejected!"
"You seriously don't understand anything... That's right, what did I expect?"
"You only think about yourself but it never occurred to you to listen to Jimin. How you completely destroyed him and he has himself as a complete zero because of you. But that's okay, right? Because you did what you did and you move on!"
"You don't care that you hurt someone and don't care to admit it and at least apologize! You don't have to be such a dick, you know! I also thought you are a good guy, but gosh how I was wrong!"
"So if you have no intention, to correct your mistake, don't show your face to Jimin! I don't want my friend hurt again" Yoongi looked at the younger, panting slightly.
"Fuck you all, seriously, give me a break!" Yoongi said leaving the room.
/Be back tomorrow!/
Oh and I will update this #taekookau
in a couple of hours! Check it out if you want. Bye Bye! This au will really hurt so I will need someone to cry with ;-;