Live tweeting Dar conference cause I'm bored: "I am a man made disasDAR" No shit sherlock.

We took over in April 2022 to destroy Pakistan because IK wasn't doing it fast enough.

Baldylocks in KPK tried to sabotage the IMF program... I didn't need help. I can do it myself. Just look at my trackrecord.

"I'm going to share my mind." OMG THE PRELUDE TO ALL OF MY BRAINCELLS DYING

Phenomenal presentation of random numbers that no human being on earth could possibly be following. At this point all I hear is: blablablabla random number, gdp, growth, blabala

The money that I've been telling you that we've raised from friendlies for almost a year now is still a figment of my imagination but I will continue talking about it like it exists.

Kind of like when I tell my friends about me being a ladiesman back in my college days.

I just had to import the landcruisers. How else was I going to go look at the damage done by the floods while completely forgetting about the fact that those actually happened?

My gross mismanagement of the economy has nothing to do with rampant inflation that has destroyed poor people. It was all about commodities and floods - which I can't do anything about. Even mother nature hates me.

Dar: I call it love. The poor are my children, I am their father. I shall hold them to my bosom and embrace them tightly. Reporter: have you ever held a person dying of hunger. Dar: No but I can make sure you also die hungry.

I didn't kill exports. I mean I didn't not kill exports. Here are some random percentages to make up for it. Now eat dirt bitccheessss.

Personal favourite: if the PKR got slaughtered, it's your fault not mine. BUT if petrol goes down by 5 rs after going up by 100... it's all on me babyyyyyy

HAHAHA DON'T YOU LOOSE TALK ME BABY. ONLY HARDDDDD TALK.

Our external debt is going down. I keep paying people out of our reserves without securinig new money. Some would call this a run on my reserves. I call it genius.

I am now going to make my case for why I'm less bad than IK: ok fine I got nothing. I'm literally the worst person to ever live.

57thousandsnightybillion reasons to love me.

WHO IS MAKING IT MORE EXPENSIVE FOR ME TO BORROW TO FUND MY RECKLESS SPENDING (and eventually cause everythinig to collapse).. WHYYYY WHYYYY?

The independence of institutions is criminal. It has led to the deminse of this country. DAR is the ultimate contra.

AGAIN, I do not need anyone's help to sabotage the IMF program. I am the expert. Why is the baldy and his daddy tryinig to assist me? If I need assistance, I will call of seccy finance. Get it. He's the assistant.

We should stop talking about default. That will make it go away. Not talking about something difficult is what our culture is based on. Get raped? Don't talk about it. Your husband beats you? Don't talk about it. Minorities get lynched? Don't talk about it. Same with default.

We should not spend so much because we can't afford it. That's why I spend as much as possible and want interest rates to be lower so that I can spend even more. What I say is exactly what I mean, except when I don't mean it cuz my audience is too stupid to know what i'm saying.

"There's no need for a financial emergency." I am so relieved. MA, Pakistan emerging.

I don't take questions from Khyber TV. Agent of the baldy.

Dollar Dar. Over and out. Just like your livelihood and future.