unholy ✧ #taekookau
Taehyung is starting to think that he's becoming a bit of a satyromaniac.
Yes, you read that right. Kim Taehyung, the pastor's son, loves having sex all the time
And not just /any/ sex, oh boy. That was just the tip of the iceberg.
tags and warnings:
— fordidden/secret relationship
— (internalised) homophobia • gay awakening • coming out
— mentions of religion
— church boy taehyung • frat boy jeongguk
— to be posted in my nsfw account @⛓️
— I might go to hell for this lol
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Taehyung is starting to think that he’s becoming a bit of a satyromaniac. Yes, you read that right. Kim Taehyung, the pastor’s son, loves having sex all the time.
And not just /any/ sex, oh boy. That was just the tip of the iceberg, really. Just the icing on the cake,
because Taehyung doesn't just love sex. He loves having filthy and sinful gay sex as his homophobic parents called it.
But at that point, Taehyung really couldn’t give a flying fuck as to what she or her whole church thinks.
They can graze their knees out of worship for their beliefs, while Taehyung can graze his own for worshiping cock.
Ever since Taehyung was just a small child, he was already so immersed in his parents’ beliefs. Was brought to church events and gatherings, was encouraged to do volunteer work, serve the church, pray and all those things that a typical church boy would do.
He has been living under the strict supervision of his mother and father, and lived a sheltered life doing the things he was taught to do since he was young. He has never had the opportunity to do what he wants and was always left curious
and a bit jealous of others who were free to do whatever they pleased without the fear of any consequences; of being judged.
Until college, that is. His first taste of actual freedom.
It actually came as a surprise to him that parents trusted him enough to live in the dorms,
and go to a regular college rather than the catholic one they wanted. But he guesses that the fact that he was nothing but an obedient son since forever, and that the college he enrolled in actually has a great curriculum was what made them agree,
with a warning to not lose himself in temptation while living outside their roof.
And at first, Taehyung did alright. He went to classes, he made some new friends and stuck with some old friends he met in church, he prayed every night and called his parents to update them with
what was happening to him, or basically, he was still a little tied to his parents’ leash.
Free, but not quite.
Until Jimin, his best friend and soulmate, decided to take matters into his own tiny little murderous hands and dragged Taehyung to some fraternity party
a month after his first day in college.
Taehyung was at first hesitant. He has some ideas as to what happens to college parties. He knows sin lurks in every corner of it, and he was afraid that his parents would find out since he already told them that he was going to go to bed.
Jimin reassured him countless times that it was going to be alright. To think of it as a normal social gathering.
And he quotes “You need to experience things, at least once, Taetae. Didn’t you tell me you’ve been curious about things like these since you were young?
Well now’s your chance to try them.”
And that was that.
Jimin has been his best friend and church mate ever since they were in daycare, and out of everyone including his parents, Jimin knew him and his secret desires best.
He trusted Jimin the most, and he would be lying if he said that Jimin was wrong, so he agreed.
Taehyung wore the clothes that Jimin lent him– some tight faux leather pants and a sheer shirt that displayed his collarbones.
It made him feel a bit self conscious since it was different from his usual button-up long sleeves and slacks, but soon got used to the snug material especially when Jimin described him as hot.
By the time he and Jimin arrived at the house, the party was already in full swing.
People around their age were hanging out on the front porch talking amongst themselves, holding a red cup in their hands. Some were on the yard smoking and laughing loudly and the music was so loud that Taehyung could barely hear his own thoughts.
It was scary.
At least for someone inexperienced like him, it is. Taehyung finds himself holding the material of Jimin’s shirt as they enter the house and is met with even louder music and even more people.
He scans the area and he could see that the house’s living room served as a makeshift dance floor area where strobe lights littered and shined on bodies upon bodies of people dancing and grinding against each other, making him look away, red faced.
The middle of the house was mostly a narrow hallway with a bathroom at the end where a person was sitting down, sleeping with their mouth open next to a staircase. And on the other side of the house was the kitchen and dining area, where people were playing some sort of game on
the dining table, trying to shoot a ball into a cup while a small crowd watched and cheered the players nearby.
It’s barely been a minute and Taehyung’s already starting to feel uneasy. Like a fish out of water. Like he didn’t belong there.
Still, he tries to fight his inhibitions away as he follows Jimin to the kitchen where one of their elder friends, Hoseok, was standing and talking to someone else.
“You made it!” Hoseok says, meeting Jimin halfway and engulfing the shorter male in a huge hug. “You came!”
Taehyung meets Hoseok’s eyes while the latter was hugging Jimin, causing him to squeal and pull back from his hug with Jimin and approach him. “Taehyungie?” he grins manically as he looks at him from top to bottom, unable to believe his eyes. “You’re here too?”
Taehyung smiles at him diplomatically. “Hey hyung,” he replies, briefly hugging the elder. “It’s nice to be here.”
“I’d say the same, but I’m scared you’ll tattle us on your mother!” Hoseok guffaws joyfully, pulling him and Jimin to the kitchen towards the guy that he
was speaking to.
Hoseok also goes to church with him and Jimin. Though, he never really volunteered like they did and just attended mass with his parents on Sundays and only ever befriended him when the church hosted a dance competition and Hoseok joined.
Since then he’s been one of Taehyung and Jimin’s closest friends.
Taehyung snorts at him. “If I do that then I’ll be exposing myself too, so don’t worry about it.” he says lightly. “I kind of sneaked past my curfew to come.”
Hoseok grins at him widely, like some sort of proud parent. “My little rebel!” he squeals, turning around to pull him to the kitchen where Jimin was already speaking to the person that Hoseok was talking to before they arrived.
For some ungodly reason, Taehyung finds himself losing his breath as soon as his eyes meet the stranger’s dark ones.
The stranger is a guy. Around his height, long dark hair falling until his shoulders, strong eyebrows with a piercing on the right, ivory skin, pink lips,
wearing some ripped jeans that reveal muscled thighs and a fitted shirt that displayed a strong chest and an arm sleeve full of tattoos.
Looking like the embodiment of sin, Taehyung thought to himself as he stopped next to Hobi and convinced himself to stop staring at the him.
“Anyway, I want you to meet someone, Tae.” Hoseok puts an arm around his shoulders and points at the stranger. “This is my best friend, Jeongguk! Jeongguk, this is the guy I was telling you about earlier: Taehyung.”
The guy– Jeongguk nods in his direction as he leaned back on the kitchen counter, a red cup in his hand. “Hey,” he says, grinning at him widely. Grinning at him handsomely, it nearly made Taehyung’s knees give in. “Nice to meet you.”
“Same here.” he murmurs, nodding at the male. Trying to control the sudden and the unexplainable rush of blood in his cheeks.
Taehyung has no idea why Jeongguk has this instant effect on him.
Sure, he’s handsome and he has muscles that are threatening to rip his clothes off.
Sure, it looks like he’s holding some stars captive in his eyes, and that the dark tattoos decorating his right arm makes him look sexy.
/But he’s a boy./
A boy shouldn’t have this kind of effect on Taehyung.
As if reading his mind, Jeongguk shoots him a sly smirk that causes Taehyung to look down on his shoes. Too ashamed to meet the other’s eyes after those shameful thoughts.
The conversation continues from there with Hoseok complaining about some project that they’re expected to complete by the end of the semester, and with Jimin joining in the conversation since the three of them apparently share the same major.
Taehyung sticks to the side, silently listening as he takes a seat on the counter. Preferring to become one with the kitchen backsplashes since Jeongguk has been catching him staring for the past couple of minutes, leaving him with rosy cheeks /all the time./
God, he thinks. What was happening to him?
The more he stays there, the more uneasy Taehyung begins to feel. It helps that they’re staying in the kitchen where it’s less crowded compared to the other areas of the house, but with everything else surrounding him– with a couple
making out in the dining room where Taehyung could see clearly from his perch on the counter, the shameless grinding happening in the kitchen and god knows what else is happening in the other rooms, Taehyung begins to fidget in discomfort.
Jimin of course is aware of this of course, and asked if he wanted to maybe dance or go out and meet other people but Taehyung declined. Still not feeling all too comfortable leaving his safe spot. And likewise, Taehyung could also feel through the soulmate bond he shares
with Jimin that the latter was beginning to feel antsy being in just one place for too long.
Jimin was always the more outgoing and sociable between the two of them. His parents weren’t as strict as Taehyung’s so he was always brave when it came to non-church related events
such as this. And although Taehyung could be a social butterfly if he wanted, the frat party wasn’t exactly his scene, so that hinders him from doing so.
Still, he doesn’t want Jimin to waste the night glued to his side.
The last thing that Taehyung wants to do is become a baggage. Plus, that would give him the opportunity to sneak out and go back to their dorm once he was out of Jimin’s watchful eyes.
He bumps into Jimin’s side, making the latter look at him with a raised eyebrow. “What?”
“You know you can leave me here if you want to, Min,” he tells him with a smile. “I’ll be fine by myself for a few minutes.”
Jimin scrunches his eyebrows at him. “No, I brought you here. Why would I leave you?” he asks, ever the most considerate. Honestly, Taehyung is so lucky
to have him.
“It’s fine.” Taehyung gestures towards the living room area. “You’ve been looking at the dancefloor for around ten times now. I’ll be fine. I promise. Just go already.”
“But–” Jimin tries to reason.
“It’s okay, Jimin-ssi.” The answer comes from Jeongguk this time, making the two of them look at the other with a surprised look on their faces. “I’ll take care of him.”
Taehyung was doing well in trying to control the blush on his cheeks. He swears on the cross that he is. –
If only Jeon Jeongguk didn’t swipe a pierced tongue over his bottom lip, making it look glossed with spit, as he looked at Taehyung with something akin to hunger in his eyes, then he would have succeeded.
Before Taehyung could utter a response, Hoseok nodded at Jeongguk with
a sly smirk on his face. The devil’s advocate. Before he pulls Jimin to the living room, not letting the latter say another word and leaving him and Jeongguk in the kitchen alone.
So much for escaping the party, Taehyung thought as he fidgets in his seat and observes his nails
for lack of anything to do.
Taehyung senses Jeongguk begin to move around the kitchen, his broad back facing him as he grabs an empty red cup and places some ice in it before adding some coca cola and some whiskey before facing Taehyung and handing the cup to him with a smirk.
Well, who’s fault is that? Taehyung thought. But regardless, he accepts the cup with a quiet thank you and takes a small, hesitant sip. Surprisingly, the alcohol doesn’t taste as bad he thought and drinks a more generous gulp. He didn’t even realize that he was thirsty.
“Taehyung, right?” Jeongguk asks as he watches him with an unrelenting gaze. Crossing his arms, making his muscles bulge.
Taehyung gulps. “Yeah.” he licks his lips as he looks down on his drink.
Jeongguk seems to have been observing him since he chuckles at him.
“Like it?” he asks.
“Yeah, it– it doesn’t taste bad at all,” Taehyung replies, still a bit shy. “My parents say alcohol tastes bitter.”
Jeongguk snorts. “Are you the pastor’s son?” he asks, making Taehyung look up at him and quirk a questioning eyebrow up.
“Hoseok told me he invited some church kid over. I’m not judging you or anything. Don’t worry, I was just asking.”
His tone surprised Taehyung, not because he seemed insincere but quite the opposite of it. Unlike the people he goes to church with, who masked their silent
judgment with a fake smile and sugar coated words, Jeongguk says things how it is. Simple and direct to the point, which Taehyung appreciates.
“Yeah, I am.” Taehyung nods self consciously. Biting his lip. “Which kind of explains why I’m feeling a little…”
“Out of place?” Jeongguk finishes for him with a handsome grin. Again, why is that making Taehyung’s chest tighten?
“Yes.” he admits as he shyly runs his fingers through his hair. “Guess you could say that.”
Jeongguk hums, still with that smile on his face, before he walks
and sits next to Taehyung on the counter. Tipping their cups together and taking a generous swig.
“Like I said,” he says, tongue poking out again to lick his lips. Taehyung’s eyes subtly follow the movement. “I’ll take care of you.”
And take care of him, Jeongguk does. Much to his heart’s confusion, because he couldn’t decide if he wanted to be taken cared of or not. But since he was there already, might as well, he thought.
They stay in the kitchen talking about anything and nothing, making the atmosphere around them less tense and Taehyung to be more at ease. Forgetting the sins surrounding him and his focus solely on just Jeongguk.
He finds out that Jeongguk is a year older. A dance major, like how Jimin and Hoseok are. He likes to drink beer while singing karaoke, and that he and his brother are the team captains of the university’s soccer team.
And Taehyung shares that he’s studying pre-med, his parents’ decision, but wants to take up art. Shares about Yeontan, his small pooch and his love for all things jazz.
Time flies faster as he and Jeongguk converse. Taehyung ends up drinking one cup after another, enjoying
the drink and his companion and completely forgetting about the fact that it’s his first time drinking.
He only realizes that he’s had one too many drinks already when he hops off of the kitchen counter to go find Jimin and finds everything spinning, causing him to
lose his footing.
Thankfully, strong arms wrap around his waist and support his weight, saving him from an inevitable fall. And soon, Taehyung is met with intense doe eyes that’s looking at him with nothing but concern etched on his handsome face, causing his face to flush.
“You okay?” Jeongguk asks, strong eyebrows meeting.
Taehyung swallows as he tears his gaze away from the other– wrong move since everything started to spin some more. “Yeah,” he says, reaching for the cup again but only for a tattooed hand to grip around his wrist, stopping him.
"If I were you, I'd hold off on the alcohol." Jeongguk tells him, grabbing the cup and placing it back on the counter. "You've been drinking whiskey coke like it's water for the past three hours already. If I were you, I'd start taking it easy."
“Three hours?” Taehyung repeats. “We’ve been here for three hours?”
Jeongguk chuckles at him. “Yeah.” he says, now looking around the room. “I’ll try and look for Jimin and Hoseok. Will you be okay by yourself for a while?”
Taehyung tries to nod, but as soon as he does, he feels his stomach start to bubble with an uneasy feeling, causing him to retch and feel the full effect of the alcohol he inhaled earlier.
“Guess that’s a no,” he hears Jeongguk mutter.
Taehyung was about to argue that he was okay. That Jeongguk didn’t need to take care of him anymore but before he could say a word, he felt hands circling around his thighs and before Taehyung knew it,
Jeongguk was giving him a piggyback ride and was heading into the direction of the stairs.
Taehyung is sure he’s as red as a rose, but he can’t really bring himself to utter a word of complaint since he’s too busy either trying to stop his heart from beating widely inside his
chest or not puke on Jeongguk’s shoulder as the latter carries him up to the second floor, bypassing a couple closed doors that has some socks hanging on the knobs before turning to the last door on the right and entering it.
The room was already lit.
Through Taehyung’s hazy gaze, he registers two single beds pushed against the walls, with a window in the middle and a huge cabinet on another side. Jeongguk gently deposits him on one of the single beds inside the room, making Taehyung groan as the room continues to spin.
“Is the party over?” a third voice, a voice that sounds so much like Jeongguk’s. Only, it isn’t. It only sounds like him but there’s something distinct about it that separates him from Jeongguk.
Taehyung turns to look at the source of the voice, which is the bed next to the one he’s laying in, and finds himself looking at…
“There’s still a few people down there.” someone– Jeongguk, the Jeongguk standing next to the bed, replies to the Jeongguk that’s on the other bed. “Did you stay in our room all night?”
“I went down for a bit and came up pretty early,” the second Jeongguk answers, surveying
Taehyung with an eyebrow raised. “Who’s this? Can we share again?”
The warmth on his cheeks must be what hell feels like, Taehyung thought, as he looks at the Jeongguk perched on the other bed.
He realizes belatedly that the other Jeongguk is half naked, giving him the fantastic view of this Jeongguk’s arm sleeve of tattoos and strong pecs. Like Jeongguk, he has the same features only his hair was cropped short and there’s a lip piercing on his bottom lip.
And God. Why is that making his pants a little tight?
“Don’t be an ass, Kook.” Jeongguk rolls his eyes. “His name is Taehyung. He’s Hoseok’s friend.”
“Oh, the church guy?” the other, Kook, says as he shifts his position and starts to lean his weight on his arms, making his
muscles freaking flex.
Perhaps he may be a little gay, Taehyung thought
Or maybe, a small voice whispers in his head. A voice he always associated with his conscience. Maybe the devil is trying to trick you into thinking that.
Well, the devil sure is doing one hell of a good job, Taehyung thought before he catches himself and shakes his head. Trying to collect himself and excuse his thoughts as him being a little drunk.
“Did you spike my drink or something?” Taehyung says, interrupting the two. His headache getting worse as he looks in between the two of them. “Am I imagining you talking to yourself or–?”
The Jeongguk from the bed snorts while the Jeongguk standing next to him smiles at him.
“Oh sorry,” Jeongguk says, gesturing to the male on the bed. “This is my brother, Tae. Jungkook.”
“Twin brother, in case you’re still wondering.” Jungkook adds, looking at Taehyung intensely. Eyes scanning him as he licks his lips, before turning to look at Jeongguk.
“And speaking of Hoseok, I saw him dip with some guy and Yoongi,” Jungkook says as he sits on his bed and leans on the headboard. “Looks like that bastard is getting some tonight.”
“What did the other guy look like?” Jeongguk asks him, taking a seat on the edge of the bed
where Taehyung is laying in as he scrunches his eyebrows at his brother. “Is he blond? A couple inches shorter than us–?”
“Bratz lips and nice ass?” Jungkook continues. “Yeah. Saw them getting handsy in the dancefloor and they went out. They’re probably going to Yoongi’s place.”
Wait what? Taehyung thought. Jimin is having a threesome? With– with /men?/
Taehyung blinks as he takes the information in. Feeling a bit betrayed. Don’t get him wrong, he isn’t judging Jimin for being gay or anything. His friendship with the shorter male is nothing
but unconditional. He’s mostly just upset because he didn’t find out from Jimin himself about this. They are soulmates, after all.
Sure, Taehyung is a bit religious, but that never would have been a reason for him to shun him out of his life completely.
Maybe he would have for leaving him alone at some party with hot twins, making him question his sexuality, yes.
But for him being gay? No. Never.
Still, he finds himself getting pouty. Shifting his position on the bed and massaging his head.
“Guess I should get going too,” Taehyung slurs, trying to sit down. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to impose myself, Jeongguk.”
“Don’t apologize.” Jeongguk turns to look at him with eyebrows scrunched. “I told you I’ll take care of your. Right?”
Fuck the alcohol, Taehyung thought. Because at Jeongguk’s reply, he blushes and tries to hide it by rubbing his heated face with his palms.
He hears Jungkook snicker. “Do you have your phone on you?” Jungkook asks. “Maybe you can try and call them.”
Taehyung attempts to pat his pockets, fighting the noodley feelings in his arms before he remembers that he left it with Jimin since his pants don't have pockets. “No.” He pouts. “My head hurts.”
He hears Jeongguk sigh though there’s a tilt of fondness mixed in his tone.
“I’ll grab you some water and an aspirin. Stay here.” he says, standing up and heading towards the door before shooting his twin a firm look. “And you. Don’t try anything.”
Jungkook rolls his eyes at him.
“Just get out and grab your boy some water already, Shitface,’ he says, making Jeongguk roll his eyes before leaving.
Taehyung doesn’t know how to feel about being called Jeongguk’s boy.
But he kind of likes it.
Fuck, he wishes Jimin were here so they could discuss this some more. Maybe if he found out about his best friend’s sexuality a little earlier, then he would have realized some of his own pent up feelings sooner rather than finding it out like this.
Finding out that he may be a little gay as well.
“You’re fucking hot,” Jungkook tells him, now looking at him shamelessly with a wicked grin on his face.
Okay, maybe he isn’t a /little/ gay. Maybe he’s just plain gay.
No wonder he didn’t feel a thing when Eunhee kissed him when they were in highschool but felt more when he watched Mingyu’s sweat drip down his body after playing basketball.
“Thanks.” Taehyung bites his lips, allowing himself to look at the other. “You’re not so bad yourself.”
Jungkook grins at him wickedly. “I’ll show you how bad I can be if you let me.” he says cockily, making Taehyung blush.
“I leave for a minute and you’re already trying to shoot your shot.” Jeongguk reenters the room, holding a bottle of water and a pill in his hands, rolling his eyes at his brother. “Can’t you keep your cock in your pants for at least one minute?”
“Hard not to with a pretty face like him,” Jungkook replies, winking at Taehyung and making the latter sputter and look down on his lap as he accepts the water from Jeongguk and swallows the pill.
“Well back off,” Jeongguk tells him. “I saw him first.”
“I’m seven minutes older than you,” Jungkook says with a roll of his eyes.
“Best seven minutes of my life.” Jeongguk replies as he turns to look at Taehyung who’s now a scarlet mess.
He never imagined finding out he was gay like this. Over twins– /twin brothers,/ for goodness’ sake fighting over him like some toy. And honestly, it makes Taehyung feel so desired. So wanted.
And so fucking confused.
Taehyung stands, not wanting to be in the
same room anymore. Not wanting these sinful thoughts to cloud over his judgment since he knows it isn’t right. Since he knows he isn’t supposed to feel this way over twin brothers.
“I should go,” he mumbles, head bowed low. “Thanks for keeping me company.”
“You’re drunk.” Jungkook points out, sounding firm. “Stay here for a bit. We won’t eat you or anything if that’s what you’re worried about.”
But the thing is, that’s what he kind of wants, he thought. But he shakes his head and tries to make his way to the door with two wobbly
feet. “N-no, thank you.” he manages with a stutter. “I-I’ll be fine.”
“Wait,” Jeongguk says, blocking his way and scrunching his eyebrows at him. “Let me call Hoseok and ask him where you live. I can walk you home. You don’t look too good, Baby.”
Baby? Oh shit.
“N-no. It’s alright, Jeongguk.” Taehyung manages to say with a forced smile. Locking his legs together to control his arousal from between them. “I- I can manage. I promise.”
Jungkook stands from the bed and walks over to him.
And although there wasn’t any height difference, Taehyung could not help but feel small under the elder’s firm look.
“Look.” he says. “Stay here for a minute. If you don’t want Gguk walking you home, the least you can do is wait for your drunkenness to die down before heading
out. It’s two in the morning. You might get mugged.”
It must be Jungkook’s dominating presence, Taehyung thought. It must be Jungkook's presence overall mixed with the concerned gaze that Jeongguk is shooting his way that convinced him to stay.
Because that’s what he ends up doing. Staying in the twins’ shared bedroom, talking all night like he did with Jeongguk in the kitchen. They talk about Taehyung as if he was the most interesting person on the planet, asking him everything. What his likes and dislikes are.
His passions, his hobbies and just– it makes him feel a bit special. /Very/ special, actually.
It feels like he’s never had the opportunity to do this before. Talk about himself and what he wants. What his desires are not what he’s expected to like without anyone judging him.
He talks about art and shyly admits that he was curious to draw nude images before, not because he's a pervert or anything, but he always wanted to master drawing body parts.
And during that time, he gets a better understanding of how to separate the twins apart.
Though they look ninety-eight percent alike with just their tattoos and piercings different, Taehyung finds out that Jeongguk is passionate about dancing and painting whereas Jungkook was more inclined towards math and theories, hence his engineering degree.
He also observes how Jeongguk was more gentle, softer and Jungkook was more firm. More commanding.
Though, both of them seem to be quite protective regardless of that since in the middle of the conversation, when Taehyung felt like throwing up, Jungkook instantly got on his feet
and carried him bridal style towards the bathroom and Jeongguk went ahead preparing everything for their arrival.
It was so nice. They were so nice. And Taehyung is still so confused about what he should feel because how can something that’s so wrong, feel so right?
By the time Taehyung felt better, less drunk. He told them that he was going to go back to the dorms, and the twins eagerly offered to walk him back. Saying it’s safer for him since it was only four in the morning and went with him like they said, not taking no for answer.
And by the time he’s safely in his dorm where he finds Jimin laying in bed with hickies surrounding his neck as if he’s wearing a freaking necklace, Taehyung finds his back slotting against the door. Heartbeat out of control and butterflies fluttering inside his stomach at the
memory of both Jeongguk and Jungkook smiling at him dopey-ly as they asked for his number.
He tells himself that they’re just being friendly. That’s all. That he’s just a little drunk and that somehow the party where sin was all around him just got to him.
But when his phone pinged twice with a text. Away from sin and temptation, no longer drunk and now completely aware of everything.
He finds his heart beating even more widely as reads the texts from both Jeongguk and Jungkook asking if he wants to hang out again tomorrow,
well later, and have some lunch. The three of them. And from what the texts imply, it sounds like a /date./
Jesus Christ, he thinks. He hopes confession can save him.
Does he want to be saved, though?
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
Safe to say that Taehyung did not meet up with either Jeongguk or Jungkook the next day.
It’s not like he didn’t want to go or because he didn’t like them, but the opposite of it in fact.
Taehyung actually really /really/ wants to meet them because he genuinely
enjoyed the twins' company. They were nothing but nice. Sure, they flirted with him once in a while and turned him into a blushing mess, but for the most part, Taehyung likes them because they listen and don’t judge.
They were sweet and they treated him well that night unlike no girl did.
Plus they were so handsome and hot. It left him feeling a bit helpless because although he has appreciated other men’s looks before, Jeongguk and Jungkook were just outwardly beautiful.
Whenever he thinks of them, his hands itch to grab a pencil and draw their features to the best of his ability because they deserve to be immortalized. That’s how handsome he thinks they are.
The feeling of being attracted to boys is still so new to him, and he doesn’t know how to feel about that just yet. Let alone how to act on them since it’s nothing that he has experienced before and was taught to him countless times that it’s a sin.
So he bails like the coward he is and wallows in his misery.
Punishment, he thinks, for even feeling this way in the first place.
The next morning once he was more sober and Taehyung found Jimin sporting a turtleneck to probably hide his temporary tattoo necklace,
he confronted his best friend about knowing something that he probably shouldn’t have. Namely, how Jimin ‘got some’ with Hoseok and some other guy named Yoongi and why he’s wearing the turtleneck.
Jimin cried, understandably so.
He hugged Taehyung that morning and explained that he didn’t tell him about his sexuality because he was afraid that Taehyung might think differently of him. Because of the church, and the fact that he was the pastor’s son who was raised to think that that was a sin.
Of course, Taehyung hugged his soulmate back and told him that he was an idiot. And reassured him countless times that nothing changed. That they’re still best friends and even if Jimin murdered someone, Taehyung would gladly help him hide the body with no questions asked.
Something that made Jimin snort despite his tear stricken eyes and snotty nose before they proceeded to cuddle in Taehyung’s single bed, with Jimin telling him everything. How at first it was just him and Hoseok fooling around, until Hoseok went to college and met Yoongi.
And how things just became complicated, in the best way possible, since then.
“Remember Taemin hyung?” he says, looking at Taehyung hesitantly.
“Your dance partner in that competition. Right?” Taehyung replies, trying to look open. “Why? Did– you know…”
Jimin nods at him slowly, lips slightly pursed. “He was the one who made me realize who I prefer,” he admits. “I don’t know how to explain it, Tae. But at first, I thought I just admired them and that I thought he was good-looking but after getting to know him, I just… I just
knew that it was something else. I knew I liked guys because a girl has never made me feel interested since then. I don’t know. Does that make sense?”
Taehyung hums, nodding his head at the other. “It does,” he replies, biting his lips because it’s kind of how he felt when he
met both Jeongguk and Jungkook and it kind of explains why no one has ever made him feel the flutter in his chest until he met the twins. It seems his and Jimin’s experience was alike, in a way.
But then again, they are soulmates for a reason.
Plus he’s now starting to understand why Jimin is afraid to come out to him because he now feels the same. He’s confused, still. The beliefs his parents drilled in his head are still rooted to his brain and he’s still afraid.
Which is kind of the reason why Taehyung held off from coming out to Jimin as well.
He knows Jimin won’t judge. And that Jimin will be the most understanding but fear is a silly thing. It can make one be unreasonable and Taehyung is no exception. So he hides it.
At least until he properly figures it out first.
Thankfully it was the weekend so there was no reason for Taehyung to head out since he didn’t have classes. Meaning, there was no chance of him bumping into a certain someone, or rather, /someones./
He and Jimin spent the weekend catching up on homework and on their k-dramas, and at some point, Jimin left to go meet up with the mysterious Yoongi, leaving the dorm with a blush on his cheeks. Taehyung only threw a condom at him and a “be safe.”
Once alone, Taehyung is left to deal with his phone that has been pinging with messages ever since Saturday morning. Messages that came from Jeongguk and Jungkook, that is. Asking him how he is. What he’s doing. If he’s mad at them. If they could meet.
And just, it makes him feel more scared at how fond it made him feel about them.
Still, he’s a coward who doesn’t know how to face his fears so ignores them and just goes about his day until his phone stops ringing and Taehyung is left a miserable mess.
The weekend passes and the weekdays arrive in a blink of an eye.
Taehyung is in the university’s Christian Club (surprise, surprise) and he’s been assigned the task to hand out flyers for an upcoming fundraiser talent show that’s set to take place in less than three weeks.
It’s Wednesday afternoon. He’s sitting under an oak tree with said flyers in his hands, being promptly ignored as usual no matter how hard he smiles at passersby and offers them one. He’s pretty exhausted and is soaking with sweat, but he still perseveres because
he still has a lot of flyers to hand out and he barely has anyone interested in signing up to join.
He’s currently sitting on the grass, using said flyers as a makeshift fan. Resting with his eyes closed for a minute.
Praying that he could at least get one person to join the competition until he goes back to his dorm and sleep.
Suddenly, a shade blocks the sun’s harsh rays. Thinking it’s Jimin, Taehyung stays seated and with his eyes closed.
Wanting to rest some more before he and his best friend start giving out flyers again.
“One more minute, Mimi,” Taehyung says tiredly. “It’s so hot today. I think I’m gonna burn.”
“I think you’re hotter.”
That instantly gets Taehyung to open his eyes and look up to find Jungkook looking down at him. Wearing some loose shorts, a muscle tee, some sneakers and a bucket hat. If Taehyung flushes even more, it’s not because of the sun anymore
but because of the heat that Jungkook’s body is radiating with, and his cocky grin.
But he wasn’t gonna admit that out loud.
Taehyung clears his throat. “Hey.” he looks down, picking on the grass.
“Hey yourself,” Jungkook replies, sitting down on the grass next to him
and leaning on the tree. “Why did you ghost us?”
Although his tone didn’t sound biting, Taehyung could not help but feel guilty as he avoids the other’s gaze and looked down on the grass.
“Sorry,” he mumbles. “I–”
‘I kind of like you and your twin? Which is kind of bad because aside from the fact that being gay was frowned upon in my religion, having a thing for brothers was a whole new other level of sin.’ was what he wanted to say, but ends up trailing off his sentence
as he bites his lips.
Jungkook sighs from beside him. “Look, I get it,” he says, patting his knee gently and making Taehyung look at him wearily. “Hoseok told us about… about the religion thing. So I get why you’re avoiding us. I just came to say I’m sorry for coming in too
strong and that you could maybe forget about that whole night of me and Gguk being all flirty if that makes it more comfortable for you.”
To say Taehyung was shocked was a huge understatement. He was completely floored and the other’s sincere apology did nothing to stop Taehyung
from feeling more for him. He knew that the twins were direct to the point but he didn’t think that they’d broach this topic of him being a (seemingly) straight church kid so gently and be so considerate, to the point that Jungkook apologized even after Taehyung ignored them
for days. And even reached out to Hoseok to understand him.
It was unfair, really. To live in a world where being homosexual was seen as a stigma in the church. To be deduced as a sinner for simply liking someone of the same gender.
It’s hypocritical if Taehyung thinks of it more, that a group of people who were taught by some book to love others as you love yourself, to be judgemental like this. To point fingers and mock someone when the God they worship was described to love all, regardless of anything.
Taehyung hears Jungkook sigh defeatedly next to him and senses him grab his gym bag on the floor and begin to stand. “Anyway, like I said. Me and Jeongguk are sorry and we’ll stop bothering you anymore since–”
“Wait!” Taehyung says, pulling him down on the grass with a shy blush
on his cheeks. “I–”
He flails his hands, trying to look for the right words. Jungkook watches him with an amused smile but waits patiently.
“I– fuck. No, why are you apologizing? I was the one who ignored you after you and Jeongguk were kind to me that evening.
I should be the one who’s sorry.” he manages to say through his stutters. “So sorry. Sorry for ghosting you and for not bothering to tell you why. I guess you were right when you said I was uncomfortable, but not because of your flirting but because–”
Because he was still trying to organize his feelings and think about it more, Taehyung thought but only ended up sighing as he looked down on his lap and bunches his pants with closed fists.
“Because it was new.” Jungkook suffices with an understanding nod. “Okay, I hear you.”
And god. Taehyung has never met anyone apart from Jimin who just gets him in an instant. Someone who can read between the lines, be non judgemental and just… it makes him feel really heard.
“Thank you.” Taehyung shoots him a small smile.
“Yeah, it’s new. I– I’ve never had a, uh, boy flirt with me before. Let alone twins, so it took me time to process.”
“Understandable.” Jungkook nods, sounding casual and light. As if he didn’t want Taehyung to be burdened with even more guilt, which he appreciates a lot.
“Anyway, are we friends?”
“Friends.” Taehyung agrees with a smile.
Jungkook grins back at him widely, showing his bunny teeth.
Fuck, there goes the butterflies again.
“So,” Jungkook says, gesturing towards the flyers in his hands. “What’cha up to?”
“Just handing out flyers for the Christian Club,” Taehyung explains, handing the elder one a flier. “The church is hosting a talent show in three weeks and I’m trying to recruit participants.”
Jungkook accepts the flier and proceeds to read it. “Oh, cool. Five hundred thousand won prize? That’s generous!” he says, eyes widening. “Are you accepting people who aren’t a part of the church?”
Taehyung’s eyes widened. “Why?” he asks. “I mean, it’s open for everyone to join.
But, uh, are you thinking of participating?”
“Nah, I’m not thinking of participating.” Taehyung slightly deflates. “I want to join if you’ll have me. Where do I sign up?”
Taehyung grins at him, wide and boxy, making Jungkook slightly blush but remains smiling nonetheless.
“You will?” Taehyung says eagerly. “You want to join?”
“Sure.” Jungkook nods, opening his bag and grabbing a pen. “Where’s the sign up sheet?”
Taehyung eagerly hands him his clipboard that only has one name– Jimin, listed there and watches as Jungkook enters his information to
show to him that he’s serious about joining.
“There.” Jungkook returns his clipboard. “Now you have yourself a competition.”
“Oh my bears. Thank you, Jungkookie! It means a lot,” Taehyung says happily, not realizing he used a nickname.
“I’ve been handing out flyers for two hours now and you’re the first to actually sign up.”
“Really?” Jungkook replies, scrunching his eyebrows. “People actually had the audacity to ignore you? What a bunch of blind losers.”
Taehyung blushes, but this time, he doesn’t look away from Jungkook. Still too happy over one registration. “Yeah well, I don’t think they’re interested in some church thing.” he mumbles.
Jungkook snorts, and before Taehyung could ask, he steals the clipboard from him
and stands. Looking around the university’s courtyard until he spots a male that’s walking from afar.
“HEY!” Jungkook yells, stealing everyone's attention. “Hey Yugyeom! Come here!”
The guy, Yugyeom, walks up to them with an eyebrow raised. “What?” he asks.
Jungkook shoves the clipboard in his hands. “Sign up here with that band of yours. They’re giving away 500,000 won.” he explains.
Yugyeom’s eyes widened and immediately grabs the pen. “Sure!” he says, registering. Making Taehyung’s mouth drop open and stand next to Jungkook
to watch Yugyeom sign. “Is it okay if I call Jihyo and the cheer squad? I heard they need funds for new cheering outfits. This might help.”
“Sure!” Taehyung is the one who replies, bouncing on his feet. “The more the merrier!”
Yugyeom smiles and pulls his phone out to call his friend. While he does that, Jungkook begins to call over some random people and explain the talent show, making Taehyung more happy. Pretty soon, Taehyung was able to secure thirteen registrations
and a lot of interested queries asking where they can buy tickets to watch the show. All made possible thanks to Jungkook.
By the time the last person left and it was well into the evening already, Taehyung turns to Jungkook and gives him a hug.
“Thank you, Jungkook!” he says sincerely. “This really means a lot to me!”
He hears Jungkook suck in a breath but hugs him back. Tight. And mumbles a quiet, “Well, you mean a lot to me.” he reveals, making Taehyung blush and slowly pull back from the hug.
But it seems, Jungkook doesn’t want to cut the hug short and pulls him in. “Just a second more. I like how you smell.”
Taehyung could not help but chuckle at him and hug him back. Secretly not wanting the hug to end yet too. They stay for about a minute like that. A minute
that felt like eternity. Like home.
Until they finally separate and they smile at each other shyly. Bottom lips trapped between their teeth.
“Anyway.” Jungkook scratches the side of his head. “Don’t overthink this, but would you want to go and have some dinner with me?”
Taehyung’s heart starts to pound. The floaty feeling of euphoria outweighs the hesitance he once felt, so he nods at the other with a smile. “I’m buying.” he says, bending down to pick up his bag.
Jungkook grins at him. “I’m not opposed to that,” he says, leading the way out the university next to Taehyung. “But next time, I’m buying. Okay?”
Next time. Oh God. Taehyung really really wants that.
But he only nods as Jungkook leads him to some korean barbeque restaurant. Spending hours there, talking and laughing. And just, having a great time. Taehyung honestly wants to knock his head to the exhaust pipe for being a little silly and for being afraid.
Because Jungkook is quite the opposite of bad. He’s really lovely and pleasant. Under the cocky grins and the lustful eyes is a boy with a twinkling laugh and a good personality.
It’d be a sin to dim that smile down, Taehyung thought as the night progressed.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
A day later, Taehyung finds himself sharing a table with Jeongguk.
It came as a bit of a shock, actually, since he didn’t really expect to spend time with one of the twins again so soon. But to be honest, Taehyung should really stop with the assumptions since the twins have
been nothing but a surprise, a good one, since they entered his life.
After his date– wait. Scratch that. It wasn’t a date. They were just hanging out.
After /hanging out/ with Jungkook the night before, just as he walked Taehyung back to his dorms and waved at him
goodbye with that handsome smile, Taehyung’s phone pinged with a text.
The text was from Jeongguk.
It reads, ‘Why were you hanging out with Kook and ignoring me?’ followed by a series of sad emojis that made Taehyung chuckle in adoration before promptly replying with a:
‘We met by chance. But I’m sorry for ignoring you tho.’
‘No worries!!! :D But can we meet by chance too?’ Jeongguk replies not a minute later.
And Taehyung supposes that he owes Jeongguk as much as he owes Jungkook, so leaving all hesitations out the door, he replies with:
‘I might be in the library tomorrow at around 1PM. If you’re there BY CHANCE, then I guess :3’
‘Noted :D I guess let’s leave that to fate then :D’ he replies, making Taehyung smile into his phone.
Not even realizing that Jimin was inside their door, silently watching him from
his bed with an eyebrow quirked. Taehyung only became aware of him when Jimin threw a pillow at him and asked him where he was and why he was smiling like a schoolgirl with a crush.
Taehyung only shrugged at him and said that he was happy because thirteen people registered at
the talent show. It wasn’t a lie since it is part of the reason. He’s just… not giving all the details. That’s all.
Unsurprisingly, Jimin’s eyes bulged wide and demanded how he did that before jumping up and down in glee, muttering something about having to up his game since
there was going to be real competition. Taehyung only smiled at him, intentionally not answering his questions and just celebrating this small, yet important, win.
Fast forward to today and his and Jeongguk’s ‘chance’ meeting, Taehyung is at the library, pretending to study
for some test he had that afternoon but is actually listening to lady gaga through the speakers of his headphones.
Lady Gaga was kind of a taboo subject at the church because of her beliefs and what her presence meant, so she was kind of Taehyung’s guilty pleasure and liked to
listen to her songs when he’s all alone. Actually, he’s quite a fan so it always made his inner fanboy sad because he never got the opportunity to gush about her with anyone.
He was just belting out the lyrics of Bad Romance when a bag suddenly dropped on his table, making him
squeak and look up with wide eyes to find Jeongguk across from him with a teasing yet handsome grin on his face.
“Jeongguk!” Taehyung whines, hand over his heart. “You scared me.”
Jeongguk’s grin only widened as he took a seat opposite him.
“Sorry Baby.” he replies, making Taehyung blush.
Seriously, when will he stop blushing in the presence of these twins?
“Anyway,” Jeongguk says as he takes his books out of his bag. “Fancy seeing you here. Who would have thought I’d see you at the library at one o’clock today?”
Taehyung snorts as he grabs his phone from the table to turn his music off. “It must be fate,” he says with a small smile.
“Must be.” Jeongguk nods, looking at his phone and finding one of Taehyung’s music apps still open. “Lady Gaga? That’s… unexpected.”
Taehyung bites his lips as he tries to shut the app off, feeling a bit uneasy since no one knows about his Lady Gaga obsession. “Oh, uh, yeah.” he chuckles nervously. “I was just, uhm, reading while listening to music and her song came in, and–”
“Lady Gaga is cool,” Jeongguk cuts him off, sounding nonchalant as he opens his books and looks at Taehyung. “I’m assuming you heard her jazz tracks already?”
Taehyung nods at him slowly. “I- yeah. I have.” he admits shyly. “Her music is really good.”
“No shit.” Jeongguk grins at him. “When her first single came out, I think I was obsessed for months. Poker Face remains iconic to this day.”
Taehyung’s eyes start to lighten at that. “Same.” he says shyly. “Though I like Just Dance a bit more.”
“What?” Jeongguk feigns offense, making Taehyung giggle at him. “Poker face is–”
And it was mostly just them bantering. But not in a bad or heated way, but the fun kind. With the two of them arguing which song is better and singing some of her old and new hits back and forth
until the librarian shushed them and warned them to keep it down. Making both of them giggle quietly and proceed to studying.
“I’ll show you how iconic Poker Face is at the talent show,” Jeongguk then says as he picks up a pen and begins to write something on his notebook.
“I’ve been trying to work the choreography out since last night and now that I found out about how you’re gaga for Gaga then I know which music to pick.”
“You’re joining the contest too?” Taehyung asks, touched.
Jeongguk scoffs at him lightly. “Of course I did.” he nods
before looking at him and shooting him a serious look. “You really think I’m gonna let Kook woo you with his ugly singing?”
Taehyung bites his bottom lip. “He sings?”
Jeongguk snorts. “Yeah, and I dance,” he points out. “And I’m good at it, so we’ll see who wins in the end.”
Taehyung wonders what prize they’re after. And brushes it off when something inside him told him that it was his heart.
“I guess I’ll have to be the judge, then,” he replies. “But seriously, thank you for supporting the talent show, Ggukkie. It means a lot.”
“Anything for you.” Jeongguk winks, making Taehyung huff out a breath. Though his red face seemed to give his fondness for the other away.
They start to study after that. The two basked in comfortable silence as they did their own thing, with the occasional stolen stares when
the other wasn’t looking and shy smiles they exchanged when one of them catches the other.
It was just so sweet, honestly. And although, parts of him– the closeted one, is still hiding away refusing to see the light of day until it was ready, another part– the regular,
non-church boy Taehyung part, loved hanging out with Jeongguk and simply talk about the things he was ashamed yet happy about like lady gaga.
It seems he wasn’t just gaga for Gaga, but perhaps he’s a little gaga for Jeongguk too. Just don’t tell him that.
Not yet, at least. Not until he figures it out.
After their study date. Wait, again. It isn’t a date. It’s a chance meeting. Jeongguk offers to walk him to his next class, saying that it was along his way even though he knows that Jeongguk’s building was in another place since he was in the arts department
and Taehyung was in the science department.
But he lets him, because he secretly wanted to be in his presence a little more. By the time they arrive at his next class’s lecture room, he finds himself standing face to face with Jeongguk. Still with the shy and hesitant smile on
their faces, both out of words and not knowing how to end the good day they just had.
The both of them say at once, making them pause and wait for the other to continue, before they laugh since they seemed to be waiting on each other. It was silly.
They were silly.
“I wanted to say that meeting you today by chance was great.” Jeongguk eventually says as he looks at Taehyung with a soft expression on his face. “I hope we get more of that. More– more days like these.”
Taehyung smiles. He does. He wants more days of soft smiles and light banters with Jeongguk too. He wants it so much that it hurts to have to hold himself back. But he knows it wouldn’t be fair for Jeongguk, and Jungkook, to lead them on when he was still a bit unsure.
When he is still figuring it out.
As much as he wants to skip the good part, accept this part of him and live happily ever after… with a boy, there’s still so much that Taehyung has to unpack. To take into consideration before he goes there.
He didn't realize that his smile turned into a grimace as he thought of those things until Jeongguk reached to unfurl the scrunch on his eyebrows with an easy smile on his face.
“Don’t overthink it too much, Tae.” he tells him gently. “There’s no rush. I promise.”
And like Lady Gaga, like his passion for art and everything else, Jeongguk seems to understand and read between the lines just like Jungkook did. Taehyung didn’t need words for him to know exactly what he meant. And again, Taehyung appreciates it. He appreciates him so damn much.
“Thank you, Jeongguk.” Taehyung says, hugging his books against his chest. “And again, I’m sorry for ghosting you and Jungkook last weekend. I was just–”
“Don’t mention it.” Jeongguk brushes him with a wave of his hands. “I understand. You don’t even have to explain.”
“Still, I’m sorry.” Taehyung replies firmly. “It was unkind of me to leave you two hanging like that, but like you said… I’d like more days like these too.”
“Yeah?” Jeongguk grins.
“Yeah.” Taehyung replies.
“Consider it done.” the other says, eyes twinkling with promise. A promise that Taehyung believes that he wouldn’t break.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
The next Saturday arrives and Taehyung finds himself accompanying Jimin, again, to some abandoned warehouse that apparently hosts underground rap battles, among other things, according to his best friend.
And like usual, Taehyung was hesitant in coming because he wasn’t used to those types of places. Plus the event sounded illegal to him in a way, because surely the owner wouldn’t allow some random people to use some place they owned as a venue for some party. Right?
But after some coaxing, some puppy eyes, a dangerous pout, and more importantly, “Hobi hyung is going to be there! So are the twins!”, Taehyung caved. But only because Jimin was cute and nothing else. (He reminds himself to add lying to his next visit to the confession booth)
Jimin dressed him in another pair of his tight acid washed jeans, and styled one of Taehyung’s oversized white button ups above it and wrapped up the look with a loose black tie and some old converse sneakers.
“Would it be okay if I put some makeup on you, Teddy Bear?” Jimin asks as he looks at Taehyung closely, tapping his chin.
“Would you like my mother to behead me, Baby Chick?” Taehyung rolls his eyes.
Jimin scoffs at him and proceeds to get a tube of his foundation.
“What your mother doesn’t know won’t hurt you, young one.” he tells him as he dabs some of the liquid on his finger. “Come on, Tae. Just a little.”
“I don’t know, Mimi.” Taehyung eyes the foundation wearily. “This is already the second week I lied about sleeping early.
I’m scared she might find out somehow.”
“Don’t be,” Jimin encourages. “I doubt anyone would tell her. I mean, it’s a rap battle. Who would even know her, Tae?”
“She’s a pastor, Jimin.” Taehyung points out. “Someone is bound to know.”
Jimin sighs. “And apart from me, Hobi hyung and you, who do you think would be brave enough to go to an illegal rap battle a day before church?”
“So it is illegal!”
“Didn’t say it wasn’t.” Jimin shrugs. “And my point still stands. Who would say? And who would even think that
the pastor’s son would go to a place?”
Taehyung bites his lips. “Fine.” he says, making Jimin jump in excitement. “But only a little. Nothing too obvious.”
“I’ll only make your pretty features stand out. I promise!” Jimin eagerly says before he proceeds to painting his face
with nudes and something charcoal colored, and drawing something along his eyes. Until he pulls back with a satisfied smile on his face.
“If you were gay, I would have made out with you,” Jimin says as he surveys his look, making Taehyung swallow. If only he knew, he thought.
“You look gorgeous, Tae. I bet girls will be lining up for you at the event.”
“Yeah, well.” Taehyung cards his fingers through his hair. “They can try.” But they will fail.
Jimin grins before he nods and begins to pull on a dark green jacket over the white shirt he’s wearing
and grabbing his wallet and keys from their desk. “Anyway, we should get going, Tae. We don’t want to miss the good fight! I heard the twins were fighting today too.”
Taehyung stops in his tracks as Jimin’s words register in his head. “Fighting?” he asks.
Jimin snorts. “Don’t worry, Tae. It’s just play-fighting. Boxing. People just want to see them without their shirts on, that’s all.” he explains. “They do it for fun and apparently it earns them a lot of cash.”
Oh Taehyung bets they do. He’d pay actual money himself to see that.
But of course, he bottles everything inside and follows Jimin out the door.
Preparing his heart for the inevitable punches it’s going to receive by seeing two, very handsome and very hot twins, flex their strength and muscles around for everyone to see.
May God forgive him.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
a thread of character visuals if you're interested! —
As expected, like the frat party they went to, the underground rap scene was crowded as hell and it seems like everything– and Taehyung means everything bad and unholy is happening all at once.
The venue is big and is an open space that’s dimly lit with a few neon colored fluorescent lights. Music and the sound of people chattering greets them as he and Jimin enter.
Taehyung takes the place in and he sees vans parked on one side of the warehouse, the trunk open revealing coolers that have cans of beer and different kinds of alcohol inside and where most of the people flocked around waving their money in the air to buy one or more.
On another side of the venue were some bleachers you see in the gym, pushed to the wall where some people were sitting in, having drinks, some were even making out and– is someone getting a tattoo? Is that a makeshift tattoo stand?
Taehyung starts to feel uncomfortable as he follows Jimin inside towards a makeshift stage that was still being set up with microphones and speakers where Taehyung presumed the rap battle was going to take place.
Jimin grins wide as he greets a couple of people he knows as he pulls Taehyung further and further inside, holding his hand tight as if to ground him which the taller male appreciates. Everything is still so new to him, the world outside his parents’ roof still
boggles Taehyung’s mind. He’s quite jealous that Jimin blends in easily with the crowd, not looking like he’s an outsider. Because although Taehyung looks like he belongs, he feels far from it.
It still feels like he’s looking from inside the cage that his parents built him
with its cage wide open for Taehyung to escape, to explore, but he’s still afraid of leaving. Of taking a leap of faith, as ironic as it sounds.
He and Jimin stop next to the stage where more people are crowded together seemingly waiting for something to start since there’s
some old gym mats on the ground with a couple edison bulbs lighting up the place. It looks like a makeshift ring since some guy was walking around asking if anyone wanted to take bets.
Namely, the fight ring where he thinks Jeongguk and Jungkook were going to fight.
Shirtless. Their muscles and tattoos all out for display.
For some bizarre reason, Taehyung has the urge to make the sign of the cross but he holds himself back since it wasn’t really the most appropriate place to do so.
“Where are they?” he hears Jimin mutter beside him, looking around and standing on his tippy toes to look for who he assumes is Yoongi and Hoseok. “They said they were here.”
Taehyung helps, also looking around the area
till he sees a pair of familiar looking heads with dark hair– one longer and the other cropped short, surrounded by men and women shooting flirty smiles in their direction. Jeongguk and Jungkook have grins on their faces, seemingly enjoying the attention.
The image makes Taehyung’s tummy churn as he looks away, pretending not to see. He knows he has no rights or whatsoever to feel insecure, and maybe a little jealous, since they’re just friends. He himself was the one who-
laid down the boundaries of their relationship, he was the one who shied away from their advances. So what rights does he have, right?
Still, the green eyed monster was hard to beat so he looks at Jimin and shrugs. “I don’t know,” he mumbles. “Did you text your lovers already?”
Jimin snorts, pulling his phone out of his tight jeans. “I did! Let me–” but before he could finish his sentence, a pair of pale arms circle around Jimin’s waist, and a guy who’s slightly shorter than his soulmate hugs the latter from behind and kisses his neck,
making Jimin jump in surprise and Taehyung to look away with flustered cheeks since the action looks intimate to him.
“Hey Min.” the guy says, face still tucked in the crevice of Jimin’s shoulder and neck. “I missed you.”
Jimin flushes, eyes looking in between him and Taehyung hesitantly. Looking like he doesn’t know what to do since he knows Taehyung wasn’t used to this side of him yet. “Yoongi hyung,” Jimin mutters, squeezing his hands that were resting over his abdomen. “Not now. Tae’s here.”
Taehyung waves him off with a hand. “Please,” he says, still a little shy but acting nonchalant nonetheless. “Don’t stop on my account.”
Jimin still looks conflicted but Yoongi squeezes him tight. “You heard him,” he says, kissing his neck. “Don’t stop.”
“Yoongi hyung!” Jimin squeals, tickled. “Stop!”
Taehyung could not help but chuckle at the pair. Sure, it still feels odd to him to be a spectator of something that should be done inside closed doors but he can feel the affection– the love that oozes out of the both of them.
Although Jimin’s face is flushed and is trying to escape the other’s clutches, he looks happy. Happier he’s ever seen him, and they aren’t even doing anything special. Just hugging. Taehyung supposes that that’s how love is. Simple yet powerful.
He smiles at them. “I’m assuming you’re the famous Yoongi,” Taehyung says with a polite bow before he offers him a hand to shake. “I’ve heard so much about you and it’s a pleasure to finally meet you. I’m Taehyung.”
Yoongi accepts his extended hand and shakes it, his other arm still wrapped protectively around Jimin’s waist. “Nice to meet me and Hoseok’s greatest competitor,” he says, a small smile on his face. “The teddy bear. Am I right?”
Taehyung chuckles at him, lips extending into a smile. “It’s no competition,” he says.
“That’s right!” Jimin says, pulling free from Yoongi and standing beside Taehyung. “Cause my Taetae wins all the time.”
Taehyung grins at his soulmate while Yoongi just looks amused yet fond. “Damn, not even a group effort could beat you, eh?” he says. “Oh well, I’m not opposed to being second. As long as Hoseok is third.”
He and Jimin giggles.
“Anyway, wanna go get some drinks?” Yoongi says, gesturing towards the vans. “I’m buying the first round.”
“Uh, no thank you.” Taehyung waves a hand in thanks. “I have to go to church tomorrow and I don’t really like hangovers.”
Yoongi snorts. “A soda, then?” he offers. “Pretty sure they have Sprite there or something.”
“If it isn’t too much to ask then thank you, Yoongi-ssi.” Taehyung bows gratefully.
Yoongi grins and nods. “I kinda get why you like him, Jimin-ah,” he says. “He’s a baby.”
Taehyung flushes shyly but there’s a smile on his face. Jimin puts an arm around his neck. “He’s /my/ baby, so back off.” he threatens lightly. “Now shoo! And go get me a beer too.”
Yoongi bows at him ninety degrees. “As you wish, your majesty.” he says, rolling his eyes as he stands. “And Hobi and Joon are at the bleachers next to the ring. I’ll meet you there.”
“Okay.” Jimin nods.
And before Yoongi goes, he approaches Jimin and kisses him on the lips. It’s chaste and quick, but again, Taehyung could see how much Yoongi adores– loves his best friend. This time, he doesn’t shy away and keeps the smile on his face.
As soon as Yoongi is on his way to get them drinks, Jimin looks at him. Neck tinged scarlet and trying to look nonchalant, but Taehyung knows he’s buzzing with anxiety at the display that he and Yoongi did in front of him.
“Let’s go meet Hobi hyung?” he asks, already walking to the direction of the bleachers.
“Yoongi is nice,” Taehyung states, breaking the ice softly. “I’m glad it’s him, Jimin.”
Jimin looks at him then, eyes a little shiny as he smiles at Taehyung.
“I’m glad you think so, Tae,” he replies. “I really like him and Hobi hyung.”
“I think they like you too.” Taehyung chuckles, putting an arm around Jimin’s neck. “I think they like you a lot. And I’m happy for you.”
Jimin grins at him, big and wide, then proceeds to stand on his tippy toes and drops a kiss on Taehyung’s cheek. “If you find the one for you, just know that I’ll be happy for you too,” he states genuinely.
At that, Taehyung can’t help but feel his chest tighten due to the secret he was keeping. The part of him that’s still trapped inside the cage longs for escape, or at least to let someone– someone like Jimin in to help carry the cross he’s been carrying alone for the past week.
He smiles at Jimin for lack of anything to say and allows the other to pull to a group huddled together in the bleachers, laughing loudly about something.
Taehyung detects the sound of Hoseok’s infectious laughter, easily spotting the male in the middle.
Wearing loose jeans that have rips under the knees, a loose shirt that has another short sleeved button up layered over it.
“Jimin-ah!” Hoseok yells happily as soon as he sees them approaching. “Taehyungie too? Wow! It’s nice to see you at a place like this again!”
Taehyung smiles at him as he and Jimin stop by them. “Quit saying that, hyung,” Jimin scolds. “Tae is now a new person! Ain’t that right?”
Quite the understatement. But Taehyung nods at Jimin. “Yes, it’s true,” he says. “Looking good, hyung.”
Hoseok stands and does a spin to show his outfit. “Do you like it?” he grins. “It’s LV’s latest collection.”
“And yet–” another voice joins in, belonging to a tall handsome male seated beside Hoseok with brown curly hair atop his ethereal face. He points at Taehyung.
“He still looks better than you.”
Hoseok scoffs and rolls his eyes. “Why do you always have to be the villain, Jin hyung?” he says, “Where’s Yoongi hyung?”
“He got me and Tae drinks,” Jimin says, climbing up the bleachers to go sit within the group. Taehyung follows him behind.
“He should be here any minute now.”
“Shouldn’t he stop drinking?” the handsome male, Jin, says with an eyebrow raised. Crossing his legs elegantly and perching his chin on his palm. “Doesn’t he have a contest?”
“His tongue technology works best with alcohol,” Jimin says.
“Oh, I can attest to that!” Hoseok giggles.
Jin groans at them, whilst Taehyung flushes at the implication behind the message. Clearing his throat and looking down at his lap for lack of anything to do.
“Anyway, who’s this?” one of the girls with long blonde hair within their small group asks, pointing towards Taehyung. “Have we met before?”
“He’s cute.” another girl, the one with a black bob and pink bangs, giggles, looking at Taehyung with a flirty smile
and making him feel a bit awkward.
“Back off, Seolhyun,” Jimin warns lightly, wrapping a hand around Taehyung’s arm. “He’s off limits. My Taetae is too pure.”
The girl, Seolhyun, rolls her eyes at him playfully. “I was just asking,” she says. “So, are you gonna introduce us?”
“Right!” Hoseok says, arms open to begin the introductions. “Meet Taehyung, everyone! Everyone, meet Taehyung! Be nice to him. He’s new here.”
Taehyung gives the group a shy smile. “Hi, it’s nice to meet you, guys.” he says politely.
“I’m Seokjin,” the handsome male, Seokjin, says. “But you can call me Jin hyung. I’m the oldest among this bunch.”
“I’m Seol,” the girl with the pink bangs says with a wide smile. “Nice to meet you, Taehyung!”
“Same here,” Taehyung bows.
“I’m Somi,” the girl with the long
blonde hair introduces, looking at him with an eyebrow quirked. “And you really look familiar. Have we met before or something?”
Taehyung shakes his head. “No, sorry. I don’t think we have,” he says. “It’s my first time around here and I don’t go out a lot.”
“How come?” Seokjin asks, looking at him scrutinizingly. “Seol’s right. You’re handsome, Taehyung-ssi. Handsome guys like us need to flaunt it more to the world.”
Taehyung blushes while the rest of the group groans at him playfully.
“Oh, I– uhm.” he swallows, looking at Jimin helplessly. He doesn’t really know how to accept compliments.
“Like what Hobi hyung said,” Jimin says, shooting him a reassuring smile. “This isn’t really Tae’s scene. You’re lucky you even got to meet him in the first place.”
“Right.” Hoseok nods. “He’s a good egg. All he does is study, church and sleep.”
“Church?” Somi asks, lips turning into a grimace. “You go there?”
Hoseok giggles. “He practically lives there,” he says. “He’s the pastor’s kid.”
Somi doesn’t hold back and grimaces at him, looking at him like she feels sorry for him and effectively making Taehyung fidget in his seat due to discomfort.
The thing is, he isn’t really ashamed or he doesn’t really dislike being a church boy. Despite the prejudices that come with being a member of the church, he actually enjoys attending services and doing church work.
And even atop his recent sexuality crisis, he doesn’t forget to pray every night. He thinks it’s always going to be a part of him since it's been instilled in him since he was young – being a church boy, that is.
But he knows how most people feel about people like him.
He cannot really escape the judgment wherever he goes. Not from the church or from the world outside its walls. Even though he doesn’t force his beliefs on others and just minds his own business, there will always be someone ready to judge.
“Oh quit being a bitch, Somi.” Seokjin rolls his eyes. “You just met him for fuck’s sake.”
“Yeah, come on, Som.” Seolhyun says, bumping her shoulder against Somi’s before shooting Taehyung an apologetic look.
“Sorry about her, Taehyung-ssi. She tends to have strong opinions on certain things.”
Taehyung gives them a tightlipped smile. “It’s okay,” he mumbles. “I get it.” He gets it all the time, actually.
Somi waves a hand at him. “It’s nothing personal, Taehyung-ssi,” she says. “I used to go to church before college and I hated it there. Sorry.”
Seolhyun giggles. “Her parents are hella religious,” she says. “You might know them?”
Taehyung starts to feel uneasy at that. Although Somi says that she isn't active in the church anymore, the prospect of someone who’s related to their members makes him feel uncomfortable. “Uh maybe?” he says. “I know most of our members, so there’s a chance I do.”
“My stepdad is Lee Junghyun,” she says, making Taehyung’s eyes widen. “Do you know him?”
Lee Junghyun is one of their biggest donors. He and his wife used to, and to his knowledge, still have dinner with his parents.
Suddenly, he feels nerves surround every inch of his body and he starts to regret coming here at the fear that Somi might tell her parents, and her parents might tell his parents.
“I– I, uhm,” he stutters, scratching the side of his neck. “Yeah, I- I do.”
Jimin seems to sense his discomfort, scrunching his eyebrows at him worriedly before he reaches to grab his hand and squeezes it in comfort. “Anyway,” he says, attempting to change the subject. “Are the twins fighting anytime soon?”
Seokjin seems to sense Taehyung’s discomfort too, and nods at Jimin. “Yeah, they’re just greeting their fans. You know how they are.” he rolls his eyes.
“Did you guys place any bets?” Hoseok asks eagerly, patting his pockets and taking out a purple ticket.
“I placed my bet on Jungkook!”
“Jeongguk has been working out relentlessly the past week so I bet on him,” Seolhyun says, waving her ticket.
“That kid has been obsessed with his looks the past week,” Seokjin says, looking over to the twins and the group that are still
surrounding them. “You’d think he’s trying hard for someone or something.”
“Same with Jungkook.” Somi pouts. “I saw him the other day smiling on his phone. I think he likes someone.”
Seolhyun coos at her teasingly. “Oh don’t worry, Som!” she says, wrapping her arms around her shoulder. “I’m sure it’s just another fling like last time.”
Like last time? Taehyung couldn’t help but think, trying to stomp down the flowing rivers of thoughts filling his head.
But the more he tries to fight it, the more it shows on his face since his eyebrows are beginning to scrunch.
“If not then there’s always Jeongguk,” Jimin tells her. “Though, you might have to wait a bit since he recently broke up with his last girlfriend.”
“But wasn’t that three months ago?” Hoseok asks.
“It was pretty serious, though,” Seolhyun says, shrugging her shoulders. “Heard it was a rough breakup.”
“Either way,” Somi sighs. “It’d be nice to be with one of them.”
“You’ll get your shot.” Seolhyun says, rubbing her back comfortingly.
Taehyung bites his lip as he takes all of that information in.
Aside from the green eyed monster that’s been lurking around, another monster in the form of dark fog that’s called doubt joins it.
Making Taehyung’s skin crawl with insecurity. A feeling he finds that he doesn’t like.
He wasn’t really a jealous person. He was always the type to be happy with what he has and be happy for someone else even when they received something that Taehyung’s been yearning for.
He’s always had this simple belief that something that is meant for you will never get away. That he doesn’t have to be possessive to keep things, or in this case– people; because the right ones will come and stay, and you will never lose what is meant for you.
So he has never been the possessive type nor the jealous or insecure.
His eyes shift towards Jeongguk and Jungkook who are now getting ready for their match, and he wonders if the last few days they spent together meant something to them like it did to him.
He knows he has no rights to demand since he’s only been with each of them twice, and has only collected a basin full of details about the other and that there’s still a river left for him to collect.
Still, Taehyung would be lying if he said that those last few days weren’t life changing, because it is. For him it is.
Meeting Jeongguk and Jungkook felt earth suddenly changing its axis, like the air he used to think that blew towards north now blows towards south now.
And he wonders if he’s just some guy who happened to have caught both their attention at the same time, a case of happenstance.
But he shakes his head and tries to give them the benefit of the doubt. Again, he doesn’t like to be judged before being understood
so he tries not to be judgemental first too. He refrains himself from being possessive and jealous.
He tells himself that just because one thing changed, doesn’t mean everything has to.
Taehyung feels someone tap his shoulder and he turns to face them and sees Seokjin looking at him carefully. “What about you, Taehyung-ssi?” he asks conversationally. “Are you seeing someone right now?”
Taehyung gulps. “Uh, no– not really.” he says, sounding unsure.
Seokjin raises an eyebrow at him. “How come you don’t sound sure?” he asks.
“He has been mysteriously texting someone the past couple of days actually,” Jimin quips in, joining in on their conversation. “With a dopey smile on his face, if I may add.”
Taehyung chokes, clearing his throat. “It– it’s nothing,” he says. “I was just–”
God seems to show him some mercy since Yoongi suddenly arrives, balancing three bottles of beers and a can of soda in his hands. “Help!” he yells.
Jimin stands to retrieve some bottles from him, making Taehyung sigh in relief. And unbeknownst to him, Seokjin sees the action and raises an eyebrow in question.
“Where’s ours?” Seolhyun pouts, looking at the drinks that Yoongi is passing over to Jimin, Hoseok and Taehyung.
Yoongi scoffs. “Last time I checked, you aren’t my boyfriends or my boyfriends’ best friend so get your own.” he huffs, sitting in between Hoseok and Jimin.
Seokjin huffs out a breath at him. “It’s fine. I’ll ask Joon to get me one instead.” he says.
True to his word, taking his phone out and typing a text.
“Don’t expect it to arrive anytime soon,” Jimin says as he points at the ring where a tall buff male with sun kissed skin and intense yet soft eyes makes his way to the middle with a megaphone in his hands.
“I think the fight is starting soon.”
And at that, the group shifts its attention to the tiny ring and joins in the cheering as Jeongguk and Jungkook walk in the middle– shirtless, only wearing tight-fit short shorts
that accentuates their asses, the v line on their hips and their rock hard abs and their bulging biceps.
Taehyung now understands why they make a lot of money on this as he watches the twins bounce on their feet, boxing the air as the man between them speaks into the microphone.
“Are you ready?” he grins into the megaphone, making the crowd go wild. “Have you all placed your bets already?”
The crowd promptly cheers.
“Joon is getting so buff these days.” Hoseok whistles, surveying the host. “What have you been feeding him, Jin hyung?”
Seokjin smirks. “Wouldn’t you like to know?”
Taehyung tunes out of their conversation with flushed cheeks and focuses on the match. The host– Joon is telling the crowd to place their last minute bets before the twins match’s start.
He takes that opportunity to look at the twins closely. Jeongguk is on the left side, wearing green shorts and with his long hair tied into a man bun with a few stray strands falling over his face, pierced tongue running through his pierced bottom lip. Jungkook on the other hand
has his cropped hair loose and wild. He’s wearing red shorts, his eyebrow piercing glinting through the bulbs behind him as he does some stretches.
Taehyung wonders if God is testing him, and he wonders himself if he is going to pass or fail it. But from the way he’s keeping
his thighs together to constrict something, he has a feeling that we won’t really like the results.
Still, he tries to remain calm. Choosing to stay still and quiet to not make it obvious as Joon brings the megaphone to his face.
“Bets are over!” he announces with
a dimpled smile. “Let’s get it!”
And at that the crowd cheers wildly as Joon approaches the twins and huddles them together to speak to them privately, while the rest of his crew clears people away from the gym mats laying on the floor to give the twins space to fight.
Taehyung waits with bated breaths as he watches the twins nod at Joon, and before the latter walks to the side to begin their fight. The sound of a deafening bell echoes inside the warehouse, indicating the start of the match and soon it’s just Jeongguk and Jungkook in the middle
of everything and is the apple of everyone’s eyes.
The twins start by circling around each other, eyes fixed on the other as they hold up their hands that are protected with boxing gloves.
Jungkook is the first one to advance towards his twin as he attempts to land a left hook
on his side. Jeongguk swiftly avoids the hit and promptly punches his brother on his left cheek, making the latter stumble a step.
“YES!” Seolhyun and Seokjin cheers, waving their tickets. “Go Jeongguk!”
“Fight back Kook!” Hoseok yells, standing up and stomping his feet on the ground. “I bet fifty thousand on you, come on!”
Taehyung on the other hand is at a loss for words. Awed is the right term, actually.
He absolutely cannot tear his gaze at the image of the twins boxing and from the way their biceps are flexing as they attempt to land a punch on the other.
He isn’t normally a fan of violence, and he has no knowledge whatsoever when it comes to boxing
but he could tell that the twins were holding back their punches, and he could sense that some of their groans or stumbles were staged. Still, it’s still quite a sight to see and they’re very good actors. Hot actors, that is.
At some point during the match, Taehyung finds himself looking directly into Jungkook's eyes and feels himself flush pink at that brief interaction. Especially when Jungkook winked at him cockily then proceeded to throw some punches to his brother with much gusto.
From beside him, Taehyung senses Seokjin looking from Jungkook to him with an eyebrow raised before eventually shrugging and returning back to the match.
After the twins shift positions, with Jungkook’s back turned to him and with Jeongguk facing his direction,
he also catches the latter’s eyes at the change. Jeongguk’s eyes widens as he sees Taehyung, pausing in between the match to ogle at him with his mouth slightly agape.
Until Taehyung yells a hurried, “Duck!”
Thankfully, Jeongguk ducks at the last minute and begins to return the punches that his twin threw his way.
The match heats up from there it seems, and Taehyung wonders if it has anything to do with him. Because he after the twins became aware of his presence, they’ve done
nothing but flex their arms and bite their lips, gazes shifting over to Taehyung from time to time.
Taehyung is at a loss. He honestly doesn’t know if he wants them to stop or continue. It’s flattering of course. It’s nice to think that you’re somewhat grabbing the attention of
someone who has everyone else’s. It’s nice to think that they’re putting on a show for him. But that’s really all there is to it: thoughts. Delusion. At least that’s what Taehyung tells himself.
“The twins sure do look at you a lot, Taehyung-ssi.” Seokjin tells him, looking at him.
“Oh uh.” Taehyung licks his lips. “We’re friends.”
“Friends?” Seokjin quirks an eyebrow up.
Taehyung nods. “Yeah. Friends.” he gulps.
Seokjin stares at him for a second, a long and agonizing second, before he turns to look back at the fight. Muttering “They never look at someone like that before.” under his breath, making him blush,
and weirdly, a bit reassured at the fact that they reserved a special look just for him.
Maybe he is someone special.
Thankfully, the rest of the group doesn’t hear their brief conversation since they’re still too focused on the match that’s about to end since the fifteen minutes were almost up. Jimin told him that the match was just one short round, a round for the twins to display their abs
and it was done.
Soon, the sound of the bell is heard across the warehouse, making everyone cheer as Joon returns to the middle to stand in between the twins. This time, Jeongguk and Jungkook stare shamelessly back at Taehyung,
their chest heaving and sweat dripping from their bodies. Eyes holding twin intense stares as Joon says something into his megaphone.
From the corner of Taehyung’s eyes, he sees Somi look from the twins to him with her eyebrows meeting.
Taehyung starts to feel a chill climb up his spine as he makes himself small under Somi’s gaze. Suddenly reminded of the fact that she kind of has a thing for the twins, and as far as everyone knows, he’s straight.
Slowly, he tears his gaze away from the twins and focuses on his lap instead, fear crowding him into a corner and snarling at him threateningly as he hugs his arms.
“You okay?” Jimin asks, looking at him with an eyebrow raised.
Taehyung nods. “Yeah,” he mumbles. “Just– just not used to fights, I guess.”
Jimin smiles at him reassuringly. “Don’t worry, Tae,” he says. “Yoongi hyung told me that they rehearsed this fight before so I’m sure no one’s really hurt.”
Taehyung only smiles at his best friend, but deep down, he wishes he could tell him what’s really bothering him. Which is a lot at that moment, but his tongue is tied and fear is still around the corner so he ends up nodding as he bites his lips instead.
Jimin scrunches his
eyebrows, always the observant one. “You sure you’re okay, Tae?” he asks. “If there’s something bothering you, you know you can tell me. Right?”
It looks like an opening; a chance to come clean and tell his best friend about his recent worries.
But fear is a silly thing. Taehyung is silly. So he shakes his head and fakes a smile.
Jimin nods at him before he turns his attention back to the ring. Taehyung does too with hesitant eyes, and finds both Jeongguk and Jungkook looking at him with eyebrows scrunched
and with a worried look on their face. It’s as if, like always, they understand without the need for words.
Taehyung attempts to shoot them a small smile, but it seems like it looks like a grimace since the concerned looks on the twins’ faces doesn’t fade.
Sounds come in like noise through Taehyung’s ears as he sits in fear and pretends to act okay. Just wanting the night to get over with so he could escape to the confines of his bed and forget the night happened.
He doesn’t even hear the announcement of the winner since he’s still feeling anxious and only registers the happy cheers and groans of disappointments from nearby.
Until he feels hands. Warm, sweaty, pale, tattooed hands.
One on his shoulder, one at the top of his head, another tilting his chin up. Then he sees two pairs of twin doe eyes that’s looking at him protectively.
It kind of reminds him of the night he met both of them–
when it was just the three of them in their own little world. Away from judgemental and suspicious eyes.
“Hey Tae,” Jungkook says easily. “Did you like the match?” He sounds casual. Like he doesn’t want to give anything away, give Taehyung away. which he appreciates.
“Yeah, it was.” he replies, feeling some of his anxiety melt away.
“Did you see me beat his ass?” Jeongguk adds, a grin on his face. Playing along.
Jungkook snorts. “You wish. I went easy on you, shitface.” he says. “So say thank you.”
Jeongguk rolls his eyes at his brother as he sits down beside Taehyung. “Thank you for being a loser,” he teases. “And thanks to you, I can finally buy an outfit for Taehyung’s talent show.”
“Don’t bother,” Jungkook says, crossing his arms at him.
“You’re gonna lose anyway to me. Don’t waste your money.”
“Don’t count your eggs before the chicken hatches it.” his twin counters back.
“Would you two stop fighting!” Another voice, Seokjin pipes in. “You’ve just left the ring!”
“Sorry hyung.” Jeongguk shrugs. “It’s a twin thing. He triggers me a lot.”
Jungkook only scoffs and goes to sit next to Hoseok after shooting Taehyung a look that oddly translates to him as, ‘You good now?’
Taehyung shoots him a brief smile as if to reply. ‘Better now. Thanks.’
Jungkook subtly nods before he turns to talk to Yoongi about the rap battle that was going to take place in a few minutes. It seems like it’s nothing but Taehyung knows that it isn’t.
He knows that both Jeongguk and Jungkook are both trying to protect him, in a way and at the same time comfort him through their silly banters.
And it works. He feels safer now. He feels more at ease.
And it doesn’t feel like he’s carrying his cross alone anymore.
Taehyung relaxes then and there and leans back on the bleachers, basking in the comfort of the arms that Jeongguk had on his seat’s backrest and the fingers that subtly touched his shoulders.
And thinking, maybe a safe place isn’t really a place. Maybe it could be a person, or rather, people too.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
After the rap battle contest, which Yoongi undoubtedly won and made Taehyung one of the newest members of his fan club (According to Jimin, Taehyung can be the VP since he’s already the president), their group retreated back to the frat house to celebrate.
Plus, according to Hoseok, booze was cheaper outside the venue. “Just cause you all won a little more cash doesn’t mean you should waste on alcohol.” Hoseok clicked his tongue, eyeing Yoongi who was shooting him a blank look but eventually
caved when even the twins, who usually liked to stay for the afterparty, agreed.
Taehyung has a feeling that the twins only insisted because they know how he isn’t comfortable in those kinds of places. Again, just a gut feeling. (Note: His gut feelings were always right)
They’re currently sitting in the frat house’s living room. Unlike before when Taehyung was there when it was used as a dance area at the party, the living room is back to its original state. With three mismatched couches facing the coffee table in the middle, and
with a huge television mounted on the wall where a soccer game was playing.
Along the way to the house, they stopped by a convenience store and bought their poisons. Beer and soju, and some snacks they could munch on while drinking. The twins threw in some cans of sodas.
Saying they were all out. But Taehyung has another gut feeling that they bought it for him since he mentioned that he couldn’t stay long since he’s going to church the next day.
They’re all huddled together in the living room. Seolhyun and Somi are sitting on one of the couches,
talking about a project that they were paired to do. Hoseok, Yoongi and Jimin are on another sofa– Well, Jimin is sitting in Hoseok’s lap and Yoongi is beside Hoseok. While Joon, or Namjoon was on the carpet floor, in charge of passing the shot glasses filled with Soju, back
turned to the television.
The twins and Seokjin were in the kitchen, getting the snacks prepared, leaving Taehyung to occupy the last couch by himself as he listens to Jimin’s plans on making a twitter account dedicated to Yoongi so they could promote his growing rap career
some more. And with Hoseok piping in suggestions on what he could do.
“What do you think of the name Kitty Gang, babe?” Jimin asks Yoongi, looking at the latter seriously. “For your fan club name?”
Yoongi scrunches his eyebrows at him, an unimpressed look on his face, causing Hoseok and Taehyung to laugh. “No.” Yoongi scowls. “No one is going to take some rapper whose fans are called the kitties, Min.”
Hoseok laughs as he claps his hands. “It’s funny, though!”
“I think it’s quite cute.” Taehyung smiles, watching as Yoongi grimaces at him.
“Please don’t encourage him, Taehyung-ah,” Yoongi says, looking at him pleadingly. “He listens to everything you say.”
“But he’s right! It is cute!” Jimin crosses his arms, pouting at Yoongi.
“And you don’t have to call your fans kitties. You can call them your pus–”
“Jimin!” Taehyung scolds with a grin. “Don’t be crass!”
“It’s not meant to be derogatory.” Jimin shrugs, ever the most persistent before he looks at Yoongi. “So?”
“Add that to the list but it’s still a no,” Yoongi says, letting him down gently. “I want a slightly cooler fanbase name if ever I do get famous.”
Jimin sighs. “You always say no to my ideas.” he mutters glumly.
“I like your ideas.” Hoseok looks up, grinning at Jimin.
Jimin grins back at him and hugs the elder male. “I know. That’s why I like you best today.” he replies, making Yoongi scoff and mutter a quiet “Kiss ass.” under his breath and making Taehyung giggle at them.
Taehyung then feels the couch he’s sitting on slightly tremble, making him look to the side to find Jungkook climbing over the sofa’s backrest and landing next to him with a winning grin on his face, and Jeongguk following behind with a scowl, hands holding some beers and a soda.
“Cheat” Jeongguk grumbles quietly, taking the seat next to Jungkook and handing him a beer, then passing Taehyung a soda.
“You can’t win everything tonight, my little dongsaeng,” Jungkook tells him, clinking his bottle of beer with Taehyung’s soda before taking a huge swig.
Jeongguk rolls his eyes before he takes a gulp from his own bottle. Winking at Taehyung through the glass when he catches the latter staring. Taehyung clears his throat and helps himself to his drink.
“Why is everything a competition to the both of you,” Seokjin pipes in, holding a tray full of bowls of chips as he enters the kitchen. “And I thought you were going to help me with the chips but as soon as you got your beer, you bolted.”
“It’s not like you can’t handle it, Jin hyung,” Jungkook tells him with a grin.
“And besides, you’re used to doing all the kitchen work alone since you’re hooking up with Joon hyung.” Jeongguk adds, making Seokjin scoff at them as he places the tray on the coffee table
and takes a seat next to Seolhyun on the other couch.
“I’m actually better in the kitchen these days.” Namjoon whines from the floor, looking at the twins with scrunched eyebrows. “Right, hyung?”
Seokjin hums non committedly. “Pass me a beer.” he says, making everyone laugh
at Namjoon and the latter to roll his eyes. “Anyway, let’s toast before we start the shots!”
“To Yoongi’s tongue technology!” Hoseok raises a shot glass up.
“To the twins’ hot bodies!” Seolhyun laughs as they all raise their shot glasses and beers up in the air.
Taehyung could toast to that, he thought but he didn't raise his can of soda since it wasn’t an alcoholic beverage. Jungkook seems to know what’s on his mind, like always, and grabs his wrist where he’s holding his drink and guides him to clink his can with the rest.
Not wanting him to feel left out, before they bring their drinks to their lips and drink.
Seokjin didn’t miss the action and raised his eyebrows at them, before he says “So Taehyung-ssi, since you’re new around here, you’re taking the hot seat tonight.”
“The hot seat?” he asks, a little nerved.
“Yeah!” Seolhyun says excitedly, putting her shot glass on the coffee table for Namjoon to refill. “We’re really interested in getting to know you more!”
Namjoon smiles at her knowingly.
“You sure /we’re/ excited, Seol or are you just talking about yourself?” he teases lightly.
Seolhyun scoffs, rolling her eyes at him with pink dusted cheeks. “Well, have you seen him?” she says unashamedly.
“Can you blame me? I’m upset Jimin was keeping him to himself after all this time!”
“Please.” Jimin waves a hand at her. “Even if you met him ages ago, my Taehyungie is one hard man to please. He’s been single since birth for a reason.”
Taehyung opens his mouth with a ready retort. But Jimin cuts him off, soulmate bond activated. “And that ‘relationship’ you had back in seventh grade doesn’t count, Tae.” he snorts. “You were together for what? A day?”
It was a week, he thought to himself. But that won’t really work in his favor so he ends up pouting at his best friend instead.
“Cute.” he hears Jeongguk mutter from beside his twin.
Taehyung clears his throat, controlling himself from reacting to the small praise.
“You say that as if I have high standards,” he says. “I just haven’t had the chance to date, that’s all!”
“Strict parents?” Yoongi asks, looking at him.
“Guess that’s kind of a reason, yes, but not really.” Taehyung replies, scratching the side of his neck.
“Kind of the reason?” Seokjin continues, eating some peanuts and looking at him.
“Yeah.” Taehyung nods. “It’s not like I’m not allowed to date, it’s just…”
“In church, when you date, you’re kind of expected to date someone you want to marry,” Jimin explains for him as he
accepts his drink from Namjoon. “And since he’s, you know, the pastor’s son…”
“It’s kind of a big deal.” Yoongi suffices for him with an understanding nod. “So I’m assuming you haven’t met anyone you see a future with, then?”
Taehyung shrugs, taking a sip from his soda and sensing a pair of eyes burning a hole at the side of his neck. “Not really.” he mumbles shyly.
“Well what’s your type?” Somi asks, legs crossed as she holds up her shot. “Your ideal girl?”
Not a girl, a voice whispers in his head, making him clear his throat. Suddenly feeling unprepared for the line of questioning. “I– I don’t know.” he mumbles. “I mean, looks aren’t really that important to me, I guess but I think I’d prefer someone I get along with well.
Someone who I can feel at ease with and laugh with, and can put up with me too.”
“Ditto on the last part,” Hoseok says teasingly. “My Taehyungie can be bratty especially when he’s in a mopey mood. He once locked himself in his room for three days when he wasn’t elected as our
high school’s secretary!”
“Yeah.” Jimin laughs. “It took me and Hobi hyung to get him out of his pity party!”
Taehyung rolls his eyes at his friends. “The person who won had terrible penmanship!” he reasons. “And I’ve been a secretary for three consecutive years!”
“See?” Hoseok says, pointing at him. “He’s still salty to this day and that was two years ago!”
The group laughs as Taehyung sulks, crossing his arms at him playfully. “Still think I would’ve done a better job, though.” he says.
“If you run for secretary next year, I’ll vote for you, Tae,” Jeongguk quips in, breaking his silence. Shooting him a smile that Taehyung returns.
“I’ll be your campaign manager,” Jungkook adds with a winning smirk. “I was Joon hyung’s last year and he won by a landslide.”
“Only because you handed out his pins shirtless.” Seolhyun laughs.
“It is effective though.” Somi says with a smile pointed at Jungkook’s way. “He got my vote.”
Taehyung could not help but notice the flirty undertone to her words but remains quiet as he takes a sip of his drink
Plus the image of Jungkook handing out buttons with a vote for Tae written on it kept flashing in his mind.
“We can do a fundraiser too!” Jeongguk says. “Like a carwash or something.”
Now he has the image of Jeongguk dressed in a white shirt and some shorts, the wet material clinging to his body and hugging his muscular frame. Great.
He really is gay, he thought to himself as his lips extended to a line.
“Well, you’re all getting way ahead of yourself,” Taehyung says, shutting the discussion down before they suggest even more ridiculously hot ideas and before he becomes more and more sure of his sexuality. “I’m not even thinking of running but if I do, I’ll keep that in mind.”
“And going back to your ideal woman, though,” Seolhyun quips. Taehyung tries not to grimace. “Sounds like you really are looking for a keeper. Can I try my luck? I want a keeper too!”
“You failed two tests recently and you don’t know how to cook,” Jeongguk says before Taehyung can respond. Taehyung flushes, not knowing what to say as he looks at the twins where Jungkook is laughing and Jungkook has a smug look on his face.
Seolhyun scowls at them. “Well he isn’t looking for someone perfect, though!” she retorts, pouting. “He says he wants someone he can get along well with, and can put up with him! I can do that.”
“You just met him.” Seokjin points out, patting her knee and making Seolhyun sigh
before she takes another shot. “And he didn’t even laugh at that joke. So sit your ass down and behave. Sorry Tae. She’s on a mission to collect pretty boys.”
“It’s okay.” Taehyung tries to smile at Seolhyun. “But I hope you do find someone, Seol. Someone for real.”
Seolhyun smiles at him, not at all peeved at the rejection. “Thanks Tae,” she replies. “But if you change your mind, though. Call me!
Taehyung laughs and he could hear two people huffing their breath in his side.
“Anyway, enough about me,” he tells the group. “I’m sure we’ll get to know each other more in the future. Or at least, I hope that that’s the case.”
“It is.” Namjoon grins from across him. Tone warm and welcoming. “Plenty of room for the group, don’t worry.”
“And we do come as a package deal so it’s not like they have a choice.” Jimin adds with a happy smile.
“I agree!” Hoseok beams, nodding at Taehyung’s direction.
It’s a simple gesture, but it makes Taehyung’s heart full. Even though Taehyung tended to be friendly, he didn’t
really have a lot of friends. Mostly because people– both his church and non-church friends, were intimidated by him since he’s the pastor’s son. It’s nice to be a part of something, to belong rather than look through boarded windows from the outside.
The night progresses on with friendly conversations. And with Taehyung finding out more about his new found friends. Seokjin, Somi and Seolhyun he finds out are acting majors and have been friends since the three of them were in their first year.
Namjoon is Seokjin’s boyfriend, and is not only the student body’s, but the fraternity’s president as well. Hence, Seokjin was kind of an unofficial resident at the house. Yoongi is studying music and is only around the fraternity because of Hoseok, who also joined
the frat last year with the twins.
Laughter bubbles out of them easily as Hoseok goofily recounts his initiation when he joined a frat. Apparently, part of the initiation, or mission as he called it, was him taking a picture of the grumpiest person in the university smiling.
(Spoiler Alert, it was Yoongi)
“I did everything!” Hoseok says enthusiastically. “I tried to paint my face and looked like a clown. I tried making baby sounds at him and tickling him!”
“I almost broke his wrist.” Yoongi smugly adds before he takes a shot.
“He did!” Hoseok whines. “I thought I was gonna fail but I eventually succeeded at the last minute.”
“How did you do it?” Taehyung asks.
Yoongi faintly blushes. “He apologized for acting goofy,” he says.
“And he asked him out on a date.” Jimin giggles.
“Weren’t you and Hobi hyung together at that time, though?” Jungkook asks, tone curious. Leaning on his thighs to listen attentively. “Like, how did it work out?”
“Well,” Jimin says, pursing his lips as he thinks it through.
“Obviously, it was complicated at first. Me and Hobi hyung weren’t really together when he met Yoongi hyung. We were just casually flirting back and forth, maybe shared a drunken kiss one time but that was that.”
“But I was interested!” Hoseok adds hastily, smiling up at Jimin.
“I was just, I don’t know. Wasn’t sure if you were really into me, Jimin-ah.”
“I was!” Jimin exclaims. “I wasn’t sure if you were serious cause all we did was flirt, and then you went out with Yoongi hyung!”
“How did that play out?” Somi asks. “I’m sure there was a lot of misunderstanding.”
“There was.” Yoongi sighs, looking over at his boyfriends with a fond smile. “When me and Hobi went on our third date, I think? I could tell he was bothered with something so I asked, and
eventually confessed that he also likes someone else.”
“I was avoiding Hobi hyung for days,” Jimin adds. Shooting an apologetic smile in Hoseok’s direction. “But Yoongi hyung came to visit me and fuck. I was like, ‘no wonder he likes him better! He’s hot!’ and completely made
a fool of myself!”
“So how did you figure it out then?” Jeongguk asks, listening attentively.
“Me and Hobi hyung made up, and he confessed his feelings for me,” Jimin says, eyes twinkling. “But he also confessed that he has feelings for Yoongi hyung too.”
“And Yoongi hyung was like, fuck it. Let’s all be in a relationship!” Hoseok cackles. “It was hard at first because someone was trying to one up the other and shit but we eventually worked it out.”
“Yeah, and now we’re here.” Yoongi smiles, putting an arm around Hoseok’s back
and squeezing Jimin’s arm. “I’m their babysitter.”
Everyone laughs at that, while Hoseok and Jimin begin to playfully pinch Yoongi, causing the latter to scoff at them.
“It sure does sound like one hell of a ride,” Somi tells them, grinning. “I can’t imagine being in a relationship like yours. No offense. It sounds like a lot of work.”
“You don’t know the half of it.” Yoongi says lightly.
Taehyung smiles at the three of them.
Thinking how everything seemed to have paid off for them since they genuinely look like they’re all in a good place now. A place where love seeps out of them abundantly.
He can see it with Yoongi’s patience for the two, which is saying something since Taehyung knows how his two
friends are. He can see it with Hoseok’s kindness for the two, the way he’s so fond and just wants to keep them smiling all the time through his jokes and his positivity. And the way Jimin celebrates the two of them by planning a fan club for Yoongi and supporting his blossoming
career, the way he’d always be there for Hoseok’s dance competitions and parties.
Sure, it’s not really a conventional kind of relationship. It can easily be frowned upon especially at the church, but it’s love. And love is love, after all. It has no rules. No buts or commas.
It just is.
“Well they say love endures all things and you did,” Taehyung simply says. “As long as you have a lot of that, I don’t think you’re all going to fail.”
Jimin beams at him, eyes turning to crescent due to his wide smile while Hoseok flashes him a happy grin.
Yoongi tries to stifle a smile, but he knows there’s more behind it despite it.
“Anyway,” Taehyung says, checking the time on his wristwatch and seeing that it’s past one o’clock already. “I better head out. I have an early morning tomorrow.”
“Let me walk you back!” Jimin says, standing up but slightly faltering in his steps since he’s already had a couple of drinks.
“Can you even stand?” Namjoon teases, looking at him with an eyebrow raised, watching as Yoongi holds Jimin’s elbow to support him.
“Of course I can!” Jimin says, trying to pry Yoongi hand off. “Now let go Yoongi!”
“It’s okay, Mimi.” Taehyung says, standing up and pushing Jimin to sit down on the couch. “I’m a big boy. I can go back by myself and you’re drunk.”
“Just tipsy!” Jimin whines.
“Tipsy, then.” Taehyung grins at him fondly. “So just stay here. Besides, you’re sleeping here anyway so it isn’t safe for you to go back alone.”
“But–” Jimin tries to say.
Jeongguk stands. “I’ll walk Tae back.” he says casually, dusting some chips off his pants.
“I’m not drunk.”
“I can go too,” Jungkook adds, finishing his bottle of beer and placing it on the coffee table. “I want to stop by the convenience store to buy some, uh, lube.”
Taehyung clears his throat, ears starting to redden. “It’s– it’s fine. I’m okay.”
“And didn’t you place an order online already for lube and condoms?” Seokjin quirks an eyebrow at them.
Jungkook shrugs nonchalantly as he stands. “Who knows when I’ll need it.” he says, beginning to walk towards the door. “C’mon, let’s go.”
“It’s really okay, Jungkookie.” Taehyung says, walking after him. Not realizing his slip that made a couple of eyebrows raise questioningly. “I’m sure you buy the, uh, lube–”
“Let’s go.” This time, the order comes from Jeongguk who’s standing by the door.
“I wanted to take a walk too.”
“But,” he tries again.
“Let’s go.” the twins say in unison, leaving no room for discussion.
“You heard them!” Jimin, the traitor, scolds. “Go with them! They can get themselves lost on their way back, I don’t care but you need to go back in one piece!”
Taehyung sighs, shoulder sagging as he walks back to the living room to tell their goodbyes.
He gives Jimin and Hoseok a hug, and waves at the rest since he’s still a bit shy. “It was really nice to meet everyone.” he tells them.
“Same here, Taehyung-ssi!” Seolhyun waves drunkenly. “Take care!”
“See you around!” Somi smiles. Looking unbothered, thankfully.
“Please look after those two idiots by the way,” Namjoon says, looking behind the two of them where the twins are standing. “I don’t trust them alone together.”
Taehyung chuckles. “I’ll do my best.” he smiles.
“I’m sure you can handle them, Tae-ah.” Seokjin says, a smirk at the corner of his lips. “Take care now!”
Taehyung flushes. “Thank you.” he bows, before turning to Yoongi. “He snores really loud when he sleeps drunk.” he points towards Jimin.
“I placed some earplugs in his jacket if you need them.”
Yoongi gracefully shoots him a wide grin, making Hoseok gasp in surprise. “You made him grin?” he exclaims, sounding betrayed. “In just a day?”
Yoongi shrugs. “What can I say?” he says.
“Jimin’s teddy bear has a way of buttering me up. Thanks Tae. Take care going home.”
Taehyung nods at them a final time before following the twins out the door where a cool breeze greets them.
He hears Jungkook say “No goodbye kisses for me?” behind him followed by a loud chorus of “Get the hell out of here!” from inside the house, making Taehyung giggle.
“Tough crowd.” Jungkook comments after he slams the door shut and catches up to him and Jeongguk.
“You got them wrapped around your finger, though.”
“Well have you taken a look at him?” Jeongguk replies with a roll of his eyes. “You look beautiful by the way, Tae.”
Jungkook scoffs, looking offended as he looks at his twin.
“Of course I have,” he says. “And yes. He is beautiful.”
Beautiful? Taehyung thought. He doesn’t know how to react to that certain praise. Sure, he’s been told that he’s handsome or good looking. And sometimes sexy by Jimin.
But beautiful was new and he finds that it flatters him more than the other words he’s heard.
He finds out just then about how much he likes it, and wonders if it’s special because the twins were the first to tell him that.
“Thank you,” Taehyung eventually says as the three of them walk along a pavement that’s lit with street lamps. The light emits a warm glow as the sounds of crickets chirp nearby. “No one has told me that before.”
“Glad to be the first one to say that.” Jeongguk says, a smug look on his face.
Jungkook snorts. “I thought of it first when I saw him at the ring.”
Jeongguk snorts. “Did not.”
“Did–” Jungkook tries to continue before Taehyung scoffs at the two of them.
“What are you two? Five years old?” he scolds lightly yet secretly amused as they turn a corner where the roads lead towards the dormitory buildings. “Actually, you’re worse. I’d rather look after five year olds.”
“Watch it,” Jungkook threatens lightly. “We’re older than you. I’m offended you haven’t called me hyung before.”
Taehyung flushes. “Well, you never said that I could call you that.” he mumbles.
“Well you called me Jungkookie back there and you didn’t ask if you were allowed to call me that.” Jungkook retorts lightly.
Jeongguk hums from beside him. “You called me Jeonggukkie too.” he points out, looking at Taehyung. “But by all means, keep on doing it. I kinda like it.”
“Same.” Jungkook grins as their footsteps echo, copying the sound of the thump of Taehyung’s heartbeat.
“Then why did you have to argue that case if you liked it anyways.” Taehyung mumbles, bottom lip jutting out.
“Cause you look cute when you’re whining, Tae.” Jeongguk teases with a boyish laugh, bumping his shoulder against him, making him stumble against Jungkook.
“You’re both bullies.” he comments with a roll of his eyes.
“Nah, you’re just easy to fluster,” Jungkook says. “I keep tabs on the number of times I’ve made you blush the past few days and it’s a lot.”
“Especially during our fight back at the warehouse.” Jeongguk snickers. “Did you enjoy the show that much?”
Taehyung wants nothing. -
/Absolutely nothing/ but the earth to open up and swallow him whole, then take him directly to hell at the thought that his attempts in hiding the heat on his cheeks were futile.
And even with that thought in mind, his cheeks betray him and turn scarlet in embarrassment.
He feels fingers carding through his hair, messing up his hair and the sound of twin laughter. Making him shove both of them with his elbows and huff out a breath. “You’re both terrible.” he mumbles shyly, walking ahead of them to try and control the buns from flushing.
The twins catch up to him easily, not even out of breath and walking beside him. “Hey! Wait up.” Jungkook says with a grin, placing an arm around his shoulder. It doesn’t help the case of his flustered cheeks at all, thanks.
“Hobi hyung is right. You are kind of a brat,” he teases as the three of them enter Taehyung’s dorm building and head towards the lift.
“Well, you two were teasing me,” Taehyung whines as the elevator door opens and the three of them head inside together.
“And I was blush– It was just my allergies. That’s all!”
The two of them hum with devilish smiles on their faces that Taehyung badly wants to wipe away with the holy water he has in his dorm. (He might)
The lift takes them up to his and Jimin’s floor where their dorm is located and they walk a couple steps until they stop by the door, Taehyung turns to look at them. Attempting a threatening look, even though he knows that he kind of looks as intimidating as a kitten.
“Well, I’m home safe now. Thank you for walking me home. Bye!” he says hastily, turning around to grab his keys from his pockets and slotting it inside the lock before pushing the door open. Taehyung crosses the threshold and he could sense
them attempt to follow him inside, but he turns around instantly and attempts to shut the door.
The twins laugh at him once again. His pout becomes bigger. “What do you want!” he whines, still pushing the door but he knows he’s no match for two muscled twins. “Go home now!”
“Oh come on, Tae,” Jeongguk says, placing a foot in between the door and the doorway to prevent him from closing it. “Is that how you treat your hyungs?”
Taehyung clicks his tongue at him and eventually relents from pushing since it was no use and enters the dorm,
leaving the door open. He sits on his bed, crossing his arms as he watches the twins look around the room. Still with that teasing glint in their eyes.
“Aren't you supposed to buy– what was it? Lube at the store?” Taehyung says, frowning at the two.
Jungkook shrugs. “It’s not like I need it that bad,” he mumbles. “I’m not really with anyone right now. I just said that as an excuse to walk you home.”
Taehyung, again, blushes.
But he’s also reminded of what he heard at the warehouse about Jungkook texting somebody, and Jeongguk’s recent break up. He can’t help but be more curious than flustered now since they brought it up, and since they were already there. Taehyung decides to broach the subject.
He hums, watching as Jeongguk sits on Jimin’s bed while Jungkook leans on the wall beside his study table, hands inside his shorts’ pockets as he looks at Taehyung. “Yeah well, I meant to ask you something.” he starts to say, tone changing to a more careful one.
“Sure,” Jungkook says. “We kind of wanted to ask you something too but you go first.”
“You go first.” Jeongguk says, leaning his weight on his arms.
Taehyung licks his lips as he tries to recall the details of what he’s heard before the match started.
Feeling kind of a bit hesitant since Jeongguk and Jungkook owe him nothing. But then again, Taehyung wants to be honest and he wants to drive the monsters known as jealousy and doubt away, and he knows only the twins could help him do that.
“So, I- I kind of heard a couple things from Seolhyun and the others back at the warehouse,” he starts slowly. “And you owe me nothing. I know that, but I do want to hear things directly from you two before I start blowing things out of proportion in my head.”
“Okay sure. Ask away,” Jungkook replies, putting a serious face on as he and his twin give Taehyung their full attention.
Taehyung nods. “So I kind of found out from Seol and Som that you were kinda seeing someone right now,” he says, looking at Jungkook.
“And that you recently just got out of a serious relationship.” he looks at Jeongguk.
“I know I said we’re all friends, but I can't help but think if there’s some kind of other thing that’s going on between us.
Cause that’s what it feels like to me because of all the, uh, flirting and I don’t know, the sweet gestures,” Taehyung says, using all his bravery to let all his thoughts out. “I know we’ve just met and I could be reading things wrong–”
“You’re not,” Jeongguk cuts him, no flash of playfulness in his eyes and listening to him intently. “We know you’re not dumb, Tae. We know you get the message.”
“Right.” he replies, unable to know how to feel after that admission.
Of course, there’s still an internal battle going on inside of him since this is pretty new to him, but above everything else, he also feels fluttery. A bit swooned if he’s being honest. But he tries not to focus on that. Not yet, at least.
And tries to stay in topic to drive the other doubts that were cornering him to one side.
“And well, I just don’t want to be that person in the middle of everything, you know?” he tells them, hugging himself as a defense mechanism.
“I don’t want to come in between something that you’re either trying to heal from or start with somebody else.”
Silence fills the room as the twins look at each other as if they’re tapping into their twin telepathy. Taehyung waits with bated breaths as he looks in between
the two until Jungkook sighs and walks over to him and sits beside him.
“You’re not getting in between me or someone else, Tae.” he tells him gently. Tone oozing with honesty and reassurance.
“I know I kind of have a reputation or whatever, but I hope you see past that and know that I’m not the type to lead anybody on.”
Taehyung nods, comforted as he takes in Jungkook’s words.
“And I did get out of a relationship. That’s right.” Jeongguk says next,
looking at him intensely. “But it was so long ago and I’ve moved on. The girl I was last seeing is already with someone else. We broke up because, well, like you said earlier back at the house; I was looking for someone that I saw a future with, and I guess, I didn’t see
that with my ex. Not anymore at least, and she felt the same.”
Taehyung shoots them an appreciative smile. “Thank you for your honesty.” he tells them. “I’m not really the type to allow things like these to get the best of me so I do appreciate you two for clearing that out.”
Jeongguk, on the other hand, is biting his lips. Looking deep in thought before he inhales a deep breath and looks at Taehyung, trying to look open. “Can I ask for your honesty too, Tae?” he starts.
“You don’t have to have an answer since that could be the answer as well, but since we’re talking about it. I just wanted to know…” he trails off, looking at Jungkook for support.
“Well, we were kind of wondering if there might be a slim chance of you’re maybe into one of us the way we’re both kind of into you.” Jungkook tells him bluntly but with gentleness.
“Don’t get us wrong, we’re not forcing you to be something you’re not and these last couple of days may have confused you, so we kind of wanted to know what your boundaries are. If it’s getting a little too much or if we’re pushing you too far.”
Taehyung feels soft at that. He feels incredibly smitten by the twins’ thoughtfulness and is blown away by treating his crisis delicately. He knows part of their doubts are coming from him too, because although most of the flirting came from their end,
Taehyung didn’t really do anything to stop them. It’s understandable to be confused, to want to know where you stand and where to go next.
And he isn’t exactly laying out the map because he’s hiding it. Still slightly in denial and afraid to accept that part of him.
But as he sits there with Jeongguk and Jungkook, just the three of them in their own little world. Away from prying eyes and ears, Taehyung becomes a little braver. A little more accepting of himself.
It’s still a scary thing to come to terms with, yes.
It’s still so fresh and new, but he manages to muster his courage and places a foot out of his cage.
“You’re not pushing me to do things I don’t want to do,” he admits slowly, swallowing the lump stuck on his throat.
“I- Everything is still so new to me and I was raised to think things a little traditionally, so although it does make me feel a little weird, it’s not something that I want to shy away from. Not anymore, at least.”
He sees growing smiles appear on the twins' faces.
Hope shimmering around their irises as they take that information in. And as much as Taehyung wants to keep the shine there, he doesn’t want to overwater that seed that he just planted. And he feels that the twins should know that too.
“But again,” he says hastily, looking down at his lap. “It’s still new. I’m still kind of figuring things out myself, so I don’t know yet for sure. But maybe? Maybe we could just take things slow until I do.”
“Hey,” Jungkook says, tapping his knee and
making Taehyung look at him shyly. “You can set the pace while you figure it out, but just tell us when the waves get too rough. Okay?”
“Okay.” Taehyung smiles, feeling some of the baggage on his shoulders fall on the floor.
“You’re not alone in this anymore, Tae.” Jeongguk adds, gentle and careful. “And you shouldn’t be ashamed or afraid, or at least, not to us. You know we won’t judge you.”
“Yeah, I– I guess I’m not anymore.” Taehyung replies. Still reeling over the fact that he kind of let someone, or rather– someones, in the enclosed space that he’s been hiding in for the past few days. It feels a bit freeing to tell someone, and to have someone who understands.
Who’s patient and kind and gentle.
“So where do we go from here then?” Jungkook asks, letting out a breath of relief and half-laying down on Taehyung’s single bed to ease the tension that was filling the room. “It’s your call, maknae.”
Taehyung rolls his eyes at the other.
Honestly he has no idea what the next step is, there’s still so much that he has to know about the whole being gay and being with someone.
But Taehyung has a gut feeling that the twins will help him along the way.
(Spoiler alert: his gut feelings never fail)
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
Now that Taehyung has kind of accepted that he’s gay and has voiced it to someone other than himself, he oddly feels like he’s walking around town with a rainbow flag tied around his neck like a cape, and is wearing a shirt that says ‘Love is Love!’
with a drawing of a gay couple kissing on it.
He can’t explain why but being gay feels more real after he told someone. Like it’s irrefutable and more cemented now. It feels like he’s holding some type of ticking bomb that can set off anytime, only when it explodes it’ll
announce to the world that he’s gay and everything is going to change. For the good or the bad, Taehyung doesn’t know, but he’s in no rush to find out.
After that night with the twins, the high and fluttery feeling after admitting that he’s not opposed to them pursuing him
instantly dropped and it felt like he was coming down from a sugar high. From happy and giddy to panicked and anxious.
And the worst part about it is that he has no one to freak out with.
Sure, the twins are there and Taehyung knows that they’d be willing to listen to him
and reassure that there’s nothing to be scared of. They made it clear that night that they won’t judge him, after all.
But he can’t exactly go to them and tell them that he’s having a mini panic attack /because of them./
He’s already embarrassed himself a lot, thanks, so no thanks.
After Taehyung cleared things out with the twins that evening and agreed to take it slow, Jeongguk and Jungkook asked Taehyung through separate texts if he’d be willing to go out on a date. Something that made
Taehyung’s heart skip a beat and stop at the same time since one: it’s the twins. His gay awakening. Of course his heart would skip a freaking beat.
But then again, he doesn’t know how to feel about going out with them at the same time separately because – they’re brothers.
/Twin/ brothers and the last thing he wants is to come in between them. So he’s very conflicted.
Discovering that he’s gay was already one thing he’s having a hard time dealing with. So being asked out by two men, twin brothers, was just the strawberry on top.
And everytime he thinks of having to pick one, he gets a bad headache.
Because for one, both Jeongguk and Jungkook are nothing short of perfect. His ideal type, his head suffices. Though they may be different in terms of Jungkook being more forward and flirty
while Jeongguk is more subtle yet romantic, they both make him feel happy. They’re both caring and considerate, and they just understand him in more ways than one.
Taehyung tried to not-so-subtly change the subject after each of them asked him out, something both the twins
went with since, again, they’re considerate and they respect his decision to take things slow. Something that conflicts Taehyung more than comfort him.
Which leads back to his dilemma of not having anyone to help him in his journey of being a newly gay person.
He’s been thinking of coming out to Jimin, and let him in on his big secret. But he’s holding back because so much has already changed in Taehyung’s life in the course of a week and he badly wants one thing to stay the same. Try to keep some parts of his life the same.
And for some reason, and although he knows Jimin won’t think less of him, coming out to someone you’ve known since for a long time is harder than telling someone you’ve known for a while.
So he holds off. At least for the meantime, he tells himself.
Your own pace, the sound of Jungkook’s voice enters his head that never fails to make him calmer.
Sunday service was a drag today.
Taehyung normally listens intently in every service, but today he wasn’t as attentive. He blames it on the fact that he stayed up later than intended, overthinking everything, thus resulting in him only getting an hour of sleep.
He tried his best to stifle his yawns and keep his eyes open, but even with his best attempts in hiding it, his mother caught on and elbowed him a few times during the service. Scolding him under her breath when he failed to react with the usual ‘Amen’ when
the pastor– his father, would ask the congregation a question or when he didn’t sing the worship songs as loud as usual.
Thankfully, he was able to stay awake until the end of the service and his mother didn’t mention his lack of enthusiasm afterwards.
Though, he has a feeling that she’ll bring it up later. Something he wasn’t looking forward to, but oh well, consequences.
Taehyung and his family are currently at a diner having brunch. It’s a ritual that they do after church as a way for them to bond and catch up with
what’s happening to each other’s lives. It’s usually the same conversation on repeat since nothing really exciting happens to them, but after his recent new discovery, Taehyung can’t help but feel a little anxious in their presence.
He’s been focused on eating his pancakes, listening to his parents converse about renovating their spare room back at home to a new home office.
Aside from being the head of the church, his father is also into real estate, buying old houses for cheap prices and remodeling them
so he could sell them at market value price. While his mother was an ER nurse who works at the local hospital, and is mainly the head of taking care of the church’s fundraising events and charities.
Taehyung is trying not to draw attention to himself as much as possible, not too
excited about the fact that he may possibly lie to them. Lying wasn’t his greatest forte and usually his parents see right through his lies, so it’s a bit nerve wracking to say the least.
“How’s uni, Taehyung-ah?” his father asks from across from him, holding up a cup of coffee
in his hands and quirking an eyebrow at him questioningly. Taehyung looks up at him, bracing himself and hoping he doesn’t look guilty of anything. “You didn’t call us a lot this week. You got us worried a bit.”
“Sorry Appa.” he smiles at him apologetically, cutting his pancakes
with his fork and knife with clenched fists. “I had so much homework last week, plus I was busy handing out flyers for the fundraiser we’re having by the end of the month.”
Taehyung’s mother hums at him approvingly. “How’s that going by the way?” she asks, looking at him.
“Has anyone signed up yet?”
“Yes.” Taehyung grins, happy to share some good news. “We already filled up all fifteen slots. All that’s left is to sell some tickets for the show and we’re good to go.”
His mother beams. “That’s great!” she says.
“I spoke to the school head already and they agreed to reserve the auditorium for the talent show.”
“Thanks Eomma,” he replies with a smile. “I’ll let our stage director know so she can schedule rehearsals before then and set up the stage.”
“Sounds good, honey, let me know if you need extra help. Okay?” his mother says, making Taehyung nod at her in understanding.
“And what about school?” his father asks next. “Are your grades doing okay?”
“All good,” Taehyung answers with a smile. If he were a bit more cocky he’d
brag about making it to the dean’s list, but he isn’t. And quite frankly, his parents won’t really bat an eye since it’s already expected from him. “But I think I gotta study harder for one of my classes. My last test came back with just a passing score.” he tells them honestly.
Taehyung’s mother frowns. “Why?” she asks. “Didn’t you study for it beforehand?”
Taehyung’s lips twitch. He actually did study hard but it proved to be difficult since one, the class was a bit challenging and his professor wasn’t exactly the most helpful and two, his passions
didn’t lay on his major.
He wasn’t going to tell her that, of course.
“I did.” he sighs. “It was just a bit hard. That’s all.”
“Well I’m sure you’ll do better if you commit to it more.” his father says as he cuts his bacon. Tone bleak.
“Try to study more on the weekends, Taehyung. You don’t have classes then, right?”
He doesn’t, but it's the only time in the week he could actually catch up on sleep and be a lazy human being since Sundays were reserved for church and he had a full week of class, but again,
like the perfect kid, he bites his tongue and nods. “I will.” he mumbles.
“That’s a good boy.” his mother smiles at him gently.
Taehyung tries to make the smile on his face look like an actual smile rather than a grimace.
Don’t get him wrong, his relationship with his parents are good. Sure, they were strict and had the tendency to micromanage him, but Taehyung knows that it comes from a place of concern; that they only want what’s best for him.
But what’s best for him is not exactly what Taehyung wants, and as much as he wants to tell them how he feels, he knows his concerns will fall on deaf ears and he will just end up getting a private preaching from his mother and father, so he has stopped bothering to do so.
“How’s Jimin, by the way?” his father asks. “I didn’t see him in service today. Last week too.”
That’s because he’s probably cuddled in bed with his boyfriends, he thought. “He’s good,” Taehyung replies, avoiding their eyes as he eats a slice of his pancakes.
“He’s just a bit busy, that’s all, Appa.”
His mother sighs disappointedly. “You can’t be too busy for God,” she comments. “Sunday is reserved for praise and worship.”
Oh, he’s praising and worshiping something alright. But Taehyung settles in chewing his food as slow as he can.
“Tell him to come next week,” his father says firmly. “He can’t miss three services in a row, otherwise I’ll have to talk to his father.”
“I will,” he answers. Lips pulled into a line. Hoping Jimin got back from the frat house already so he could give him a head’s up.
“If not then I think it would be best to find another company.” his mother adds before she takes a sip of her orange juice. Tone final, making Taehyung’s tummy churn in discomfort as he looks at them. “The reason why we even allowed you to attend his uni was because of him.
But it looks like he’s being influenced there.”
“Are you influenced?” his father raises an eyebrow. “It’s not too late to transfer you if ever–”
“No Appa,” Taehyung cuts him off instantly. “Jimin is just busy. His major requires a lot of practical stuff, so he’s been working
hard to practice everyday but I’ll tell him to come to church next week. I promise.”
It wasn’t exactly a lie. Jimin is busy with school, among other things. Aside from his relationship, he’s working on a routine for one of his classes
and the routine he’s going to perform at the talent show.
His father hums at him, busy chewing on his food.
Thankfully, Taehyung is saved from that conversation since one of their churchmates arrives and stops by their table to greet them, making them pause their breakfast
to stand and bow at them with a smile.
“Pastor Kim,” One of their longtime church members, Bae Jongsuk, greets them with a friendly nod. Along with his wife and daughter. “Today’s service was lovely.”
Taehyung’s father shoots them his signature pastor smile. “They’re God’s words not mine,” he replies. Referring to his preaching earlier about conquering some guy defeating a giant. Something Taehyung ironically related to.
“How’s the bakery doing, Jongsuk? I hope all is well.” his father asks. “We haven’t had the chance to visit lately. I apologize.”
“Oh, it’s all’s good, Pastor. No need to apologize and thank you for asking,” the wife replies, before looking over at Taehyung
and smiling at him warmly. “Hi Taehyung-ssi, how are you? I heard you started studying at SNU!”
“Yes, I did, Mrs. Bae,” Taehyung replies politely. “I started about two months ago and have been staying at the dorms. It’s why I haven’t been that active in the church’s youth club.”
“It’s fine, dear.” Mrs. Bae replies with a wave of her hand. “Suji has been doing a good job taking over your post as the youth leader.”
She turns to look at her daughter, Suji. Another one of Taehyung’s acquaintances at church. She’s around his age, a few inches shorter than
him with long black hair falling until her midsection that’s tied in a low ponytail, wearing jeans and a sweater.
She isn’t exactly a friend like Jimin. But Taehyung could say that they were a bit close since they both used to lead the youth club’s events, with her leading the
girls and Taehyung leading the guys. He could say their relationship is more professional than anything else.
He wishes it’s the same for her, though. Since he caught her a handful of times looking at him when she thinks he wasn’t looking and sense some of her touches
lingering longer than usual. And thinking about it, from everyone else’s point of view, it looks as though that they can be the perfect couple. The church’s youth leaders ending up together, that is.
But Taehyung has never felt that way for her.
Sure, she’s pretty and kind and is the type of person that his parents would want him to be with. And admittedly, he tried to see if he could feel the same for her, and went out to get coffee once after their youth meetings to see if there was a spark somewhere,
but the only spark he felt when he went out with her was the spark of energy since she bought him an espresso, instead of his usual strawberry frappuccino so he never tried again afterwards since he didn’t want to lead her on.
“I’m sure Suji-ssi is doing a great job.” Taehyung beams at Suji with a friendly smile. “How is it by the way?”
Suji gives him a smile. “Like what Eomma said, it’s been good,” she says. “All the youth leaders are planning to go on a hike soon though. If you’re interested?”
Taehyung was just opening his mouth to decline. Again, not wanting to lead her on since there’s a twinkle in her eyes that tells him something else. Plus, he’s busy at school on top of his extracurricular activities.
But before he can utter a word out, his mother replies, “He’ll be there.” for him. Tone final and like Taehyung has no choice. He only swallows his sigh and smiles at her.
Suji seems elated, a grin spreading out of her face. “Okay!” she says eagerly.
“I’ll register your name then and I’ll text you all the details!”
“Thank you, Suji.” Taehyung replies, trying to sound chipper.
“Anyway,” Jongsuk says, looking at them. “We won’t take much of your time anymore, Pastor.
Again, thank you for the lovely service and have a great rest of your Sunday!”
They say their goodbyes as well, and once the Baes were seated on their table a distance away and Taehyung and his family are back to finishing their breakfast, his mother looks at him intently.
“Suji is nice, don’t you think so, Taehyung-ah?” she asks.
Taehyung’s lips extend to a line. “Yeah, she is.” he replies, tone blank. Trying to get her to understand that he isn’t interested in whatever it is that she has planned.
“I heard she’s studying architecture and is the top of her class too,” his father adds, tone suggestive. “Seems like a good catch. Why don’t you try and go out on a date with her, son?”
Cause I’m not interested in her. Or any ‘hers’ for that matter, he thinks. But holds it in. Feeling more uncomfortable by the second as he finishes his pancakes and waits for his parents to finish their food so he could leave and go back to the dorm.
“I- I don’t know,” he mumbles. “I don’t really like her that way, Appa.”
“Nonsense.” his mother clicks her tongue at him. “I’m sure you’ll learn to like her over time, Taehyung-ah. Love takes time to develop after all.”
Although his mother does raise a good point, he can’t help but disagree a bit because he remembers that first night he met both Jeongguk and Jungkook, and feeling sparks explode like a firework show on a New Year’s eve when he laid eyes on both of them.
And it’s only been a week of them getting to know each other, but it feels so much longer. Like they know him in the way Jimin does, and that’s saying a lot since Jimin (kind of) knows everything about him.
To him, love is something that comes naturally and grows by itself through actions and words.
If only his parents thought the same.
“I’ll think about it, Eomma,” Taehyung replies.
“Go on that hike then,” his father says, finishing the last of his breakfast and leaning back on his chair. “Try to get to know her and ask her out properly afterwards. Okay?”
Taehyung looks at him, feeling a bit helpless. Feeling himself getting sucked in his cage and chained on the leg. He can’t help but think that it’s all unfair, that even choosing someone– whether a boy or a girl - wasn't his choice to make.
That love, to them, was all about appearances and reputations rather than a thing that’s felt mutually by both parties.
He doesn’t even know he’s holding his breath and only realizes it when he sucked up a breath and exhaled, more out of defeat than anything else,
before he replies with an, “Okay, Appa.” that makes both his parents hum in content.
“I should get going back,” Taehyung says once the bill is paid, standing up from his seat and attempting a smile. “I still have to review and do homework.”
“Want us to drive you back?” his mother asks, also standing and grabbing her purse so the three of them could head out of the diner together.
Taehyung shakes his head at them, wanting to be alone. To escape.
“No need,” he replies. “It’s out of your way and I have to stop by the store to buy some school supplies.”
“Alright then,” his mother says. Stopping by the pavement next to their car and kissing Taehyung on the cheek as goodbye. “See you next week, darling. Please take care.”
“I will, Eomma. You too.” he replies, feeling more relieved, though there’s a lump stuck on his throat.
“Call us more often, son.” his father says, shaking his hand. “Love you.”
“Love you too.” he mumbles before they go their separate ways.
Taehyung wishes he can separate from the feeling of helplessness too. Try to go back to that world he made up where he’s free to do whatever he wants, love whoever he chooses with no repercussions but the more steps he takes, the more and more he feels burdened by everything.
He wishes he can live in that world instead of pretend to. Pretend he’s happy and free, but he can’t. Not really.
He stops by the store along his way back to the dorms, picking up some stuff he needs for class and thinking of the things he could study for that day
as a way to distract himself from everything else that’s causing his shoulders to sag.
But then he hears the sound of familiar voices. Voices he associated with safety, albeit these voices were bickering as normal.
But despite that, it doesn’t fail to make Taehyung’s lips twitch to a small smile.
He walks over to the next aisle and finds the twins there, arguing. Jungkook is holding up two notebooks in his hands while Jeongguk was standing next to him with his hands inside his sweatpants’
pockets. Both sporting black bucket hats, with Jeongguk wearing a black shirt and Jungkook a white one, only the latter was wearing some shorts.
“This is cheaper,” Jungkook was saying, eyes on the notebooks. “But I like this design better.”
“Just pick one already!” Jeongguk whines, eyebrows scrunching. “It serves the same purpose for fuck’s sake!”
“Wait, look at this one that has that favorite anime we like.” Jungkook picks up a notebook that has the characters of the anime haikyuu printed on the cover. “Sweet!”
Taehyung giggles at that, causing both twins to look in his direction.
“Tae!” Jeongguk says, the scrunch on his eyebrows fading and being replaced with a bright smile. “What are you doing here?”
“What do you think, dumbass?” Jungkook says as the two of them approach him, bringing the notebooks with him. “He’s buying supplies just like everyone else.”
Jeongguk rolls his eyes at him as they stop next to him.
“Do you two ever stop fighting?” Taehyung asks, amused.
“No.” the twins said at once, making Taehyung grin.
“Well, at least you agree on one thing.” Taehyung says, looking at the notebooks that Jungkook has on his hands and pointing a finger at the haikyuu one. “If you want my opinion, I like this one.”
Jungkook throws the other two notebooks at a nearby shelf instantly. “Done.” he says with a grin, making Taehyung feel giddy inside.
“I thought you were in church today?” Jeongguk asks conversationally.
“I was,” Taehyung says with a stiff smile.
Something that made Jeongguk’s pierced eyebrows raise. “I’m just going back to the dorms. Service is finished.”
“Does church usually last four hours?” Jungkook asks, genuinely curious.
Taehyung chuckles at him lightly. “Uh no,” he says.
“I had breakfast with my parents at a place nearby. It only usually lasts for two hours at the most.”
For the twins’ benefit, they tried to stifle their grimace. It’s pretty evident that the idea of being stuck in an enclosed space filled with religious
(and most likely, homophobic) people wasn’t an ideal thought for them. For most people, actually, so he understands.
And the expression on their faces was just so comical, it’s enough to make Taehyung laugh.
Something that was usually hard to do after he spends time with his parents.
“No need to pretend you like it,” Taehyung says, smile still in place. “It’s not for everyone.”
“Just trying to be polite,” Jeongguk says, carding his fingers through his hair as he lifts his bucket hat to tuck it back in. “I know that’s important to you.”
Taehyung bites his lips, attempting to control his growing smile. “Thanks, but you don’t really have to,” he says.
“Course we do,” Jungkook replies. “If it means something to you then we respect it. Easy as that.”
God, Taehyung thinks. How he wishes everyone were like the twins who accepts things without reason, who’s considerate and just makes everything easy.
He can’t help but think back to what happened at the diner. About being forced to do things against his wishes and to succumb to what his parents think is right for him.
Taehyung didn't realize that his smile dropped and he was starting to frown
until Jeongguk reached a finger to soothe the lines that were appearing on his forehead. “You okay?” he asks, gentle and careful.
Taehyung shakes his head. “Yeah, sorry.” he clears his throat, trying to get himself together. “I spaced out there for a second. But yeah, thank you
for being considerate. I- yeah. Thanks.”
The twins frown, seemingly able to catch on to what he’s feeling.
It’s funny, Taehyung thinks. They’re the twins but he feels like he’s also connected to them since they seem to be in tune with what he’s feeling and thinking without
the need of words.
“You don’t have to thank us, Tae.” Jeongguk says, ruffling his hair lightly. “It’s nothing.”
“Trust me, it’s something to me.” he replies, tone mixed with a bit of sadness.
“Why? Something happened?” Jungkook asks, eyebrows scrunched. “Want me to beat somebody up?”
Taehyung snorts at him fondly. “I don’t condone violence,” he scolds lightly. “And it’s nothing to worry about, really. Breakfast with my parents was just… just a lot, I guess.”
Jeongguk hums at him thoughtfully, nodding his head. “I can only imagine,” he replies. “Sorry to hear, Tae.”
He only smiles at him gratefully, shifting in his feet as he looks at the twins. “Uh anyway,” he says, scratching his neck.
“I guess I should leave you to it, then? Sorry. I heard you from the other aisle. I didn’t mean to intrude and–”
“Nah, we just stopped by to grab this notebook.” Jungkook wiggles the notebook in his hand. “You’re never intruding. You’re welcome to pop out of nowhere anytime.”
“And speaking of popping out of nowhere,” Jeongguk adds, looking at Taehyung. “You doing something after this?”
“Just gonna do some advance reading for my classes next week,” he replies, quirking an eyebrow up. “Why?”
Jeongguk and Jungkook look at each other, exchanging a quick telepathic message before looking back at Taehyung.
“Well,” Jungkook starts. “You just seem a bit down.”
“And we were on our way to the park to chill and maybe buy a corndog.” Jeongguk continues.
“Oh,” Taehyung says slowly, trying not to think too much of it and get slightly excited. “Okay, sounds nice.”
Jungkook grins at him. “And we were wondering–”
“If you want to come with?” Jeongguk finishes, matching his twin’s smile.
Taehyung bites his lip, trying (and failing) to keep himself from smiling back at them widely. But then, he’s reminded of that supposed date that he’s supposed to go on with Suji– the date his parents want him to go on, on top of that hike.
He wants to say yes. He wants to fuck it all and just go with what he wants. Wants it to be as easy as the twins make it out to be. But the chains were still in place, preventing him from uttering the words out.
Luckily, the twins have the key.
“Just a quick breather, Tae.” Jungkook smiles, gentle and kind.
Taehyung exhales. “Fine.” he nods, making the twins smile. “I’ll go.”
“You’re riding with me!” Jeongguk says happily as the three of them head to check out their purchases, making Taehyung scrunch his eyebrows.
“Like fuck he is.” Jungkook snorts as he pays for his notebook, opting out of the paper bag and just taking the receipt before Taehyung pays for his own things.
“What do you mean I’m riding with you?” he asks, dropping the pads of paper on the counter and letting the
woman ring him up, before he pays them with his card. “Do you mean the bus?”
Jungkook smirks. “You’ll see.”
Taehyung only looks at them with a puzzled look as he gets his purchases and follows them outside the door, to where his question is answered with his jaw slackening open as he sees two motorcycles– Harley Davidson motorcycles parked next to the curb.
Jesus Christ, he thinks.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
- mention of minor character death
- manipulative relationship (not between tk)
- light angst
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
Riding on a Harley was an experience that Taehyung didn’t think that he’d actually quite enjoy.
At first he was hesitant in riding one since his mother never missed to tell him how motorcycles are death traps and that he shouldn’t ever ride one unless he wanted a
trip to the hospital, or worse: the morgue, so he never attempted to.
But after some coaxing and some reassurance, Taehyung eventually agreed to ride one. Making the twins promise to stick to the speed limit or below it, to which they agreed to with twin pouts on their lips.
And after a game of rock paper scissors between the twins, Taehyung ended up riding with Jeongguk first since he won, and Jungkook will take him later when they go back to the dorms. Something they both bickered about for five whole minutes, by the way, since Jeongguk kept
insisting that since he won, he should be the one to give Taehyung the ride going and returning, but eventually caved Taehyung promised to study with him on Tuesday instead. (Something that made Jungkook whine, therefore making Taehyung promise to study with him too on Wednesday)
The sound of the motorcycle’s roar made Taehyung’s heart jump along with the vibrations he felt underneath his thighs as Jeongguk waited for the engine to heat up. Taehyung found himself clinging onto Jeongguk’s sides already even though they haven’t moved yet
since the whirring noises made him nervous, but when Jeongguk kicked off and rode alongside Jungkook, both following the speed limit as promised, Taehyung started to feel less nervous and more at ease since it was evident that Jeongguk knew how to work the motorcycle well
due to how easily he was able to zip past traffic and turn along the curb flawlessly.
At some point during the ride to the park, Jeongguk kicked up speed to catch up with Jungkook who was ahead of them, making Taehyung hug his body tighter and scold him into slowing down
albeit he was laughing as he said it.
To Taehyung, it kind of felt like riding an ordinary bike. Only it was faster and louder, and only air separated them from the other vehicles that drove past them.
It felt liberating and like he was rebelling in a way, if soft breezes brushing his hair and the sunshine on his nape was what rebellion felt like; That, along with Jeongguk looking over his shoulder during traffic to check on him
and Jungkook grinning at him through his helmet while revving his bike loudly to tease Taehyung.
It feels so blissful. Freeing. He thought taking a step out of his cage to indulge himself to something as simple as riding a motorcycle would scare him, but it didn’t. Not really.
The only thing that really scares him is his mother finding out but everything else was good
The breeze hitting his face is good, the steady speed of the motorcycle is good, the feeling of choosing to do this for himself despite his fears is good. And the company? Even better.
They arrived at Hangang Park a few minutes later where a lot of people were bustling the area. Food stalls were around every corner of the park as well as tiny shops that sold souvenirs for tourists. The playground was packed with children since it was a weekend with their
parents watching closeby, and overall, it proved to be a better distraction than the advanced studying that Taehyung initially planned to do.
He and the twins settled on sitting on one of the benches beside the river with the twins eating their corndog and Taehyung sipping
on a strawberry shake that they got for him. ‘How did you know that I like strawberries?’ Taehyung had asked, to which they only responded with a smug smile.
Honestly, the twins have never failed to surprise him.
It’s honestly romantic of them to try and get to know him through other people if they aren’t together. It makes him feel special, and even though the gesture is small, it’s still so big for him. It makes his heart grow two sizes bigger, enough to keep two people there.
If only Taehyung could make it grow five times bigger to give the people inside (namely, the twins) enough space to fight since they’ve been doing that ever since they hopped off their motorcycles, he thought with a sigh.
“What are you? A kid?” Jeongguk complains from his right, looking over at Jungkook who has mustard all over his lips after taking a bite of his corndog. “Clean your face! You look like a clown.”
Jungkook scoffs, cheeks bulging since he was still chewing. “Guess who looks like me?” he retorts, making his twin roll his eyes at him and Taehyung to chuckle as he gets some napkins from his lap and wipes Jungkook’s face with it, causing the latter to smile.
“He’s right,” Taehyung says as he wipes Jungkook’s lips. “You’re like a baby.”
“As long as I’m your baby, then it’s fine,” Jungkook replies, making Taehyung’s cheeks heat and Jeongguk to snort.
“You’re so lame,” Jeongguk comments, throwing a balled napkin at him.
“Do you honestly think that Tae is gonna fall for that?”
“Well he’s blushing, ain’t he?” Jungkook retorts, throwing the napkin back at him.
Taehyung, who’s sitting in the middle of them, just sighs as he drinks his shake.
Shaking his head at them, though again, it’s flattering that the twins are trying to fight for his attention when his eyes are only on them.
“Stop,” Taehyung says, holding up a hand between them to stop them once again from fighting.
He kind of understands now what Yoongi meant when he said he was Hoseok and Jimin’s babysitter since he’s Jungkook and Jeongguk’s. “Can’t we all just get along for one day and enjoy the Sunday together?”
“Hard to when you’re with a guy like him!”
“Hard to when you’re with a guy that looks like you only uglier!”
Taehyung sighs and shoots them an unimpressed look.
“Sorry.” the both of them echo, causing Taehyung to snort.
“Anyway,” he says, trying to change the subject to keep the peace between the two. “I didn’t know that the two of you were loaded.”
“Loaded? Who? Us?” Jungkook scoffs lightly. “Please, the only thing we’re loaded with are muscles.”
Taehyung rolls his eyes. But he makes a good point about the muscles. “Then how did you get those Harleys?” he asks, trying to stay on topic. “I don’t know a lot about motorcycles but I know those are expensive, and you both have one of them.”
“Our dad owns a garage,” Jeongguk explains before taking a bite of his corndog. “It’s not big or anything but a lot of his regulars are from this bike gang that only rides Harleys.”
“Yeah.” Jungkook nods.
“And one time, their leader brought these bikes to the shop. Says the bikes needed too many repairs so they sold it to us for a good price. Not gonna lie though, the repairs were a lot of work and is expensive as fuck, but it paid off in the end.”
Taehyung hums at that. Intrigued at the newfound piece of information about the twins. “Is that why you took up mechanical engineering then?” he asks. “To follow your dad’s footsteps and take over the shop?”
“Kind of.” Jungkook shrugs. “I mean, it was my choice since I like fixing up cars and bikes. Plus, I’m not too bad at math so I picked that because I liked it. Our dad didn’t really pressure me or anything. He just wanted us to go to college and get a degree.”
at him. Though, he feels kind of a bit jealous. “Good for you,” he replies.
“What about you?” Jeongguk asks, looking at him as he finishes his corn dog with one last bite. “You said your parents picked pre-med for you, right? Is it because one of them is a doctor or something?”
“My mom is a nurse,” Taehyung says. “She was supposed to go to med school after graduating pre-med herself, but she married my dad then had me not long after so she wasn’t able to pursue it.”
“Which leaves you to live out her dreams, then?” Jungkook asks, tone careful.
Not at all accusing, making Taehyung nod at him with a sad smile. “Damn, sorry to hear.”
Taehyung sighs at him deeply. “Don’t be,” he replies. “It’s not my first choice, sure, but at least my future is secured now, right?”
“Still,” Jeongguk says. “It’s not your choice. It’s your future. You should get to decide what to do with it.”
“Yeah well, it’s not like I have a choice. My parents–” he trails off, not knowing how much he can share since the topic is a bit heavy
and he doesn’t really want to ruin the easy going atmosphere around them.
“Let me guess,” Jungkook quips in, throwing his corndog stick on the trashcan next to him and looking at Taehyung as he claps his hands to remove the crumbs off them. “They're the controlling type?”
Taehyung frowns sadly. He doesn’t really want to speak ill of his parents, but then again, would he be really speaking ill of them if he were just saying the truth? “I mean, I know they mean well,” he tries to defend weakly.
“I know they’re just looking out for me and just want my life to turn out okay, so I can’t hold that against them.”
“I understand where you’re coming from, Tae. I know they’re just parents being parents, but,” Jeongguk says, licking his lips as he chooses his words carefully.
“Guiding someone to make the right choice is different from controlling someone to make their preferred choice. You’re your own person too, Tae.”
“And even if you make the wrong choice, then so what?” Jungkook adds, crossing his legs and leaning back on the bench.
Eyes watching the small boats passing by along the river. “It’s your lesson. Not theirs. It’s how you grow.”
“When did you two get so wise suddenly?” Taehyung teases lightly, looking over at the two of them. But he has to admit their words strike a chord within him that’s
beginning to make him see things in a different light. “Are you two the same people who were boxing each other for show the other night?”
The twins snort at him and roll their eyes at him at once, making Taehyung giggle.
“Like we said,” Jeongguk says. “We’re not really made of money and the fights help our dad out with some of the expenses.”
“Plus a lot of people seem to like it.” Jungkook adds with a grin. “I know you did, Tae.”
“Oh shut up,” Taehyung says, slapping him on the thigh with blushed cheeks as the twins laugh. “Seriously, when will you ever stop mentioning that?”
“When you admit it,” Jungkook replies, smirking at him. “C’mon, just say it. I promise I’ll stop.”
“Say what?” he scoffs, crossing his arms and controlling himself from reacting in the way the twins wanted him to. “That I enjoyed watching you two punch each other at some sleazy warehouse while you’re both half naked?”
He did, Taehyung thought to himself. But he is never going to admit it out loud.
But could he ever hide anything from the twins after everything?
“Wasn’t that hard to say, right?” Jeongguk teases, looking at him with a playful glint in his eyes. “I knew it.”
“I didn’t–” Taehyung tries to complain, eyes widening.
“No take backs,” Jungkook says, grabbing Taehyung’s shake and taking a sip from it. “Nothing bad about complimenting someone.”
“You two are impossible.” Taehyung mutters to himself.
“I wonder why I keep hanging out with the two of you.”
“Want me to answer that?” Jeongguk grins.
“No.” Taehyung mumbles, trying to hide his flusteredness by stealing his drink back from Jungkook and taking a sip from it.
“But kidding aside though,” Jeongguk starts to say, copying his twin's posture. “Is- is that why you were kind of upset earlier?”
Jeongguk’s tone is conversational but Taehyung can still hear the concern and curiosity behind it.
Masking it with his casualness to make him open up. Something that he appreciates and is effective.
“Yeah,” he admits. “Being a pastor’s son is really… I don’t know.”
A label that everyone expects him to live up to. A responsibility. A burden.
Taehyung sighs. “It’s a lot to handle with only so little space to work with if that makes any sense.” he manages to say in the end.
“Other people’s expectations can really do that.” Jungkook nods. “Limit you, I mean. It removes the extra space for you to make mistakes.”
Taehyung smiles. Once again, they understand between the lines.
“Exactly.” he says. “And don’t get me wrong, I do like some of my duties. I like to do volunteer work and help out the poor and all those other things that come with the title.
I just don’t like the eyes on me, you know? I don’t want to be expected of great things. Things that I can’t do.”
“But you are doing great things, though.” Jeongguk points out, looking at him with a warm smile.
“I read that flier about the talent show and saw that all the show’s proceeds go to the children’s hospital. You’re literally volunteering your free time for this, Tae. Isn’t that a great thing?”
“It’s nothing, really.” he shyly says. “It’s not something I haven’t done before.”
“And that makes you even greater,” Jungkook says. “I can count on one hand the number of university students who would offer their precious time to do what you do, Tae. And trust me, it’s not a lot.”
“Stop.” he blushes. “Again, it’s something that’s expected from me as my dad’s son. I’m not being modest or anything, but doing those things comes with my title. It’s something that I was raised to do. Sacrifice.”
Silence envelops the three of them as his words simmer in the air. Taehyung was not the type to voice out his complaints. It’s another thing that comes along with being the pastor’s son and his strict parents’ child. So it’s
nice to let it out and have someone else know. To vent and just let those bottled up feelings loose.
He knows by saying this, the responsibilities and expectations won’t go away but it’s nice to just release those repressed feelings inside of him to give him air to breathe.
It’s nice to have someone– /someones/ who could lend him a listening ear.
“Anyway, enough about me,” Taehyung says, tone light to bring back the easy atmosphere they had going earlier. “Tell me more about you two.”
He hears one of them clear their throat,
obviously still thinking about what he had just said, before Jeongguk sits up and looks at him. “What do you want to know?” he asks.
Taehyung shrugs. “I don’t know. What about something that I don’t know? Any sob stories too?” he jokes lightly.
Jeongguk hums. “Our mother died giving birth to us,” he says, making Taehyung pause and look at him with a shocked look. “There were some complications from what our dad told us.”
“I-” Taehyung stutters. Now feeling guilty about complaining about his parents when the twins lost one. “I’m sorry. I-”
“Oh don’t be,” Jungkook says easily. “It was a long time ago.”
“Still, I’m sorry,” Taehyung says firmly. “You should’ve told me before I went on that whole rant about my parents. It was insensitive of me.”
“It wasn’t, don’t be silly.” Jeongguk says, bumping shoulders with him with a smile.
“It’s not really something that makes us sad anymore. Sure, mother’s day was kind of depressing sometimes, but it’s not something we cry about at all.”
“Regardless, I’m sure there’s a part of you that longs to have met her.” Taehyung says, placing his drink on the ground
and each grabbing one of the twins' hands and squeezing it in comfort. “To experience having one, I mean.”
Jeongguk and Jungkook shoot him a smile, and before Taehyung knows it, they’re both turning their hands and gripping his hand back. Effectively making him blush.
“It sucks to not meet her, sure.” Jungkook continues to say, not mentioning the hand holding. “But dad is enough. He did his best raising two twin boys.”
“And he did a great job, if I do say so myself.” Taehyung smiles.
Feeling his hands begin to sweat at the intimacy of the twins’ holding it and their little sharing session.
“Thanks, we’ll let him know,” Jeongguk replies with a smile. “And to give your parents the benefit of the doubt, Tae. They also did a good job raising you.”
“Still think they’re kinda controlling though,” Jungkook quips under his breath, making Taehyung snort. “No offense.”
“None taken,” Taehyung replies, easing his hands out of the twins' grips since he saw someone look in their direction.
Already missing the warmth as soon as they let go and tucking them underneath his thighs as he sways back and forth. “They can be a little too much but I love them.”
“We can all love our parents but still think they can be too much.” Jungkook says.
“And if it’s any consolation to you, just know that you won’t have to pretend or sacrifice anything when you’re with us.”
Jeongguk nods. “Yeah, what he said,” he replies. “And if they get too much, you can lean on us.”
“Same to you,” Taehyung smiles. “You can lean on me too.”
The rest of the day is spent with more talks about each other, watching boats pass by in front of them, soft smiles exchanged and just enjoying each other’s companies until it was well into the afternoon and they all needed to go back to uni to get some school work done.
And as agreed, Taehyung rides with Jungkook this time and lets the latter wear the helmet for him even though he was fully capable of doing it himself. (Not that he minded) And the three of them, well two since Taehyung was just a passenger, driving past cars that were also on
their way back home as city lights turn into a blur and wind blows past them.
Soon, they were parked outside Taehyung’s dorm building and were standing by the pavement next to it, fidgeting on their feet as they lacked anything to say.
Still too caught up by the great day they had that was about to end.
“Anyway, I had a great time,” Taehyung is the first to break their silence. Smiling at both of them. “Thank you for today.”
“Thanks for coming with,” Jeongguk says. “I know you had stuff to do, so, yeah.”
“It was nothing,” Taehyung licks his lips. “I- I actually needed the distraction as you both can tell.”
“Well if you need any more distractions, you know who to call.” Jungkook grins. “It’s me by the way. Not him.”
“Or me.” Jeongguk says, rolling his eyes at the twin.
“I’m the better twin anyway.”
“Okay, I’ll keep you /both/ in mind,” Taehyung interrupts, rolling his eyes at them. “You two go home safely now, alright?”
“Alright.” the both of them say, shooting Taehyung a warm smile before they turn around to each head out to their bikes to ride back to the frat house. He stays there, watching as the twins stand next to their respective bikes, grabbing their helmets.
Taehyung cannot help but bite his lips, still filled with that fuzzy feeling that replaced the heaviness he was feeling that morning. Fuzzy feelings that the twins were both responsible for.
He remembers that feeling about riding their motorcycles earlier.
His hesitancy to try it at first because of certain misconceptions that his mother planted in his head, and could not help but think it was oddly like this thing that he’s been wanting to try out with the twins– date.
Something he wanted, something that’s within his reach if only he holds his hand up. Something that’s so close, but the chains were holding him back.
Until he remembers that the twins have the key.
Taehyung decides to take that chance.
“Hey,” he says, walking up to them and making the twins look at him with twin looks of confusion. “Wait. I, uh, wanted to tell you something real quick.”
“Sure,” Jeongguk replies, perching his helmet on his motorcycle while his twin does the same. “What is it?”
He inhales. “So,” he starts, feeling a bit nervous, a bit unsure but it still felt good. “About that date you wanted to go with me…”
The twins’ eyes widens, ears perking up as they listen to Taehyung attentively.
“Uhm.” Taehyung tucks his hair behind his ear, looking down on his feet. “Is– is it too late to accept?”
“No.” the twins say in unison, making Taehyung stifle his smile.
He musters the courage to look up to find Jeongguk and Jungkook grinning at him from ear to ear, hope and happiness shining along with the stars in their eyes. Taehyung sucks up a breath.
“Okay,” he replies, giddy and excited. “Okay.”
“Okay.” Jungkook says too, reaching to pinch his cheeks with the boyish grin still plastered on his face. “Text me when you’re free. I’ll handle the rest.”
“Me too.” Jeongguk smiles, ruffling Taehyung’s hair. “I’ll wait for it.”
“Okay.” he replies. He sounds like a broken record, sure, but it’s the only coherent thing that he can manage to say due to the butterflies swarming in his tummy.
“See you then, Tae.” Jungkook says, fiddling with the helmet in his hands. A flash of hesitation crossing in his face for a split second before he mutters a quick, “Fuck it.” under his breath and deposited a kiss on his cheek, causing Taehyung to gasp in happy surprise.
Jeongguk scoffs at the other. “No fair.” he says, and before Taehyung could even recover from the last peck, Jeongguk does the same to his other heated cheek, making the butterflies shift into zoo animals.
“See you on the date!” Jeongguk says.
“I’ll make sure our date it better.” Jungkook grins.
“I-” Taehyung shakes his head, suddenly remembering his other dilemma. “Wait, I uh, before you go. Is- is this a bit awkward? I mean, me going out with each of you separately I mean?”
“Nope.” Jungkook answers with a chuckle. “I mean, I get why he likes you, Tae.”
“And besides,” Jeongguk smirks, looking at his twin with a challenging glint in his eyes. “We like being competitive.”
Taehyung swallows. “I- okay.” he says, a little unsure.
Of course, they catch on to his insecurities and shoots him a smile. “Don’t worry, Tae. If all else fails, there’s always plan B.” Jungkook says, before he wears his helmet and begins to straddle his bike.
“Plan B?” Taehyung asks, looking at Jeongguk who was rolling his eyes at his twin amusedly.
“You’ll see.” Jeongguk says before doing the same.
And before Taehyung can question them even more, the sound of twin motorcycles’ loud revving echoes outside, mimicking the sound of his heartbeat and making Taehyung take a step back to allow the twins to back the corner.
They wave at him goodbye. He can almost see the smirk in their smiles before they ride away into the direction of the fraternity house. Leaving Taehyung there, still at a loss of how to react after what he just did.
It feels like he was laying on a floating cloud as he goes back to his and Jimin’s door. Despite his fears and hesitations, the feeling that the twins left him with is still so strong. So right. Wrong, but right.
He enters the dorm to find Jimin sitting on his bed with a conflicted look on his face, hands clasped together as he looks at the floor.
Taehyung raises an eyebrow at him. “Hey?” he says, closing the door behind him and throwing his keys on his desk. “What’s up?”
Jimin looks at him, licking his lips. Before he says, “So, you’re going on a date huh?”
Taehyung’s heart still. And in that moment, he knows what it feels like to drop from a cloud.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
The zoo in Taehyung’s tummy now feels like a swarm of bees, stinging and rendering him frozen as he stands in his and Jimin’s dorm with its venom numbing the euphoria that was running through his veins as he stares as Jimin’s accusing and hurt look.
Taehyung feels panicked. He feels like a bucket of iced water was poured over his head, waking him up from a sweet dream so he could wake up to live out one of his many nightmares. He’s afraid and he suddenly misses the safety that the twins always come along with
and the courage they give him to accept himself more.
But they aren’t here. Taehyung knows that he can’t have them in every one of his battles in his new journey, and he also knows that this is something that he should deal with by himself. His first giant to defeat.
The giant, who’s in the form of his 174 cm best friend, that is. Taehyung sucks up a deep breath, mustering all his courage so he could coherently try and open up this part about himself to Jimin.
“Jimin, I-” he tries to say, trying to look for the right words to say. “I-”
“I thought I was your best friend, Tae,” Jimin interrupts, tone tinged with a bout of hurt as he slowly stands and approaches him. Though, the accusatory look on his face is slowly turning into a softer one. “You promised. No more secrets.”
“I- I know what I said, Mimi.” Taehyung sighs, the slump on his shoulders returning as he looks down on his feet. “I’m sorry. I meant to tell you but, I guess… I guess I was just scared of what you would say.”
“You were scared of /me/?” Jimin asks, looking at him with eyebrows scrunching. “Me? Your best friend since preschool? Your soulmate?”
“Listen, I-” Taehyung tries to say.
“You know it wouldn't have been a big deal to me, Tae,” Jimin retorts, lips frowning.
“You know I would have supported you.”
“I know. God, Jimin. Don’t you think that I know that?” Taehyung replies, tone a bit exasperated. Hugging himself and feeling small even though he was a few inches taller than his best friend.
“Didn’t you think that I’ve thought of telling you?”
“Then why didn’t you?” the other asks, looking at Taehyung intensely. “I mean, it’s just me, Tae. I’m not some random person. It’s just me. Just Jimin.”
“And that’s exactly why I didn’t tell you,” Taehyung says, tone louder and conflicted. Making Jimin close his mouth and listen to him. “Like you said. You’ve been my best friend for as long as I can remember, Jimin.
You are the only person who has always been there for me, who knows nearly everything about me too. Everything was just happening and changing too fast, and I needed you to stay the same.”
Taehyung is gasping for air at this point as he slowly lets out drops of his frustration
and guilt. “I didn’t mean to put you in the dark. I swear, but I was just making sure of it myself first too. I was testing the waters out,” he explains, tone tired. “But you beat me to it. And I’m sorry. I swear I didn’t mean to.”
They’re both silent now, save for Taehyung’s ragged breaths due to his outburst. Feeling needles prickle his skin as he waits for his friend to reply.
Eventually, Jimin sighs at him and places a hand over his shoulder before gently grabbing his hand
and pulling him towards his single bed. The fight has left Jimin’s eyes as they sit and as the latter shoots him a patient look. The corner of his lips twisting into an apologetic yet reassuring smile.
It reminds Taehyung so much of when he and Jimin were younger.
Even though they were practically the same age with only a few months separating them. Jimin liked to act like he was so much older, like he was his protector.
He remembers the times when they were in middle school. When kids would tease Taehyung as too soft, too flamboyant and too odd. Something that made him insecure, but Jimin would always come to his defense and tell those kids off.
Sure their parents would scold them once they found out because ‘that’s not how God’s children were taught’ and all that jazz, but afterwards, he and his friend would always find themselves entangled in one of their childhood beds, hands gripping each other as words of
reassurance escaped their lips.
Something that hadn’t changed throughout the years. Something that’s constant.
“Listen, Taetae. I get it.” Jimin starts, squeezing his hand and rubbing the back of it with a pad of his thumb.
“I’m sorry for coming at you like that. I- I didn’t mean to sound judgmental. I guess I was just surprised. That’s all. I really didn’t expect that to happen, actually.”
“I- I know,” Taehyung replies, looking at him with bitten lips. “I didn’t expect it to happen either.
It just– It just did.”
“I understand.” Jimin smiles. “It was like for me with Hobi hyung too. At first it was just an attraction, or at least, I thought it was an attraction but over time, I just became sure that it was something else. Something more. You know?”
Taehyung nods, because it’s the same for him. When he first saw the twins, attraction was an understatement. He thinks bewitched is a better term because he always finds himself staring at the other, admiring the stars in their eyes, the art on their skin and
the brightness of their smiles.
But then he got to know them. And sure, it isn’t as long as his other existing relationships. It’s been barely two weeks since they first laid eyes on each other but Taehyung doesn’t think he has met anyone he’s clicked with as fast as the twins.
He hasn’t met anyone who understands him so much, and is just so good to him. So good.
Meeting Jeongguk and Jungkook was just a surreal experience for him. And thinking about it now, he didn’t think he was this whipped for them already, but funny how things go.
“I know what you mean,” Taehyung replies. “It- it was like that for me too.”
Jimin grins at him happily, his eyes turning into half crescent moons as he looks at Taehyung. “I’m happy for you, Tae.” he says. “I really really am.”
Taehyung smiles back at him. “Thank you, Mimi. I’m happy too.” he replies, sighing in relief at how easy it is.
Honestly, he wonders why he was even nervous in the first place since he knew Jimin was going to be understanding as usual. It feels like he can breathe freely again,
like a thorn was pulled out of his chest, as he watches Jimin nod and let go of his hand so he could lean on the wall next to the bed.
“So?” he says, tone more chipper. “Tell me all about it, then. I want to know all the details, Tae!”
He bites his lips, mood lifting thanks to the other’s excitement. “There’s really not that much to say, really.” Taehyung scratches the side of his neck, feeling his face hot since this is kind of his first time opening up on the whole being gay and going out with boys thing.
“I- I haven’t even been on that date yet. I still have to ask.”
“Okay, fine. But how did it all start?” Jimin asks eagerly. “Is that who you were texting with after all this time then?”
“Yeah.” he blushes, trying to stifle the smile from spreading on his face.
He fails, of course, and it causes Jimin to laugh and shove him. “Good God,” he says gleefully. “I never thought I’d actually see the day you fall for someone, Taetae.”
“Me too,” Taehyung replies, slapping his foot away since Jimin kept poking him with it. “And keep
the excitement down. It’s still so new and I’m still trying to figure my feelings out.”
“You don’t have to figure things out, Tae.” Jimin snorts. “If you know, you know. It’s not a problem that you need to solve or a riddle you need to answer. It shouldn’t be complicated.”
Taehyung bites his lips. “It seems complicated,” he whines with a pout. “I don’t want to hurt or disappoint anyone.”
“Then don’t,” Jimin says easily, rolling his eyes at him. “Just go with the flow and I’m sure things will be clearer for you.”
“But it’s not that simple.” Taehyung furrows his eyebrows
“You’re the only one who’s making it complicated,” Jimin replies. “And it’s because you’re overthinking that pretty little head of yours. Take it from me, Tae. I mean– look at my relationship. It looks complicated, yeah?”
“Yeah.” Taehyung nods.
“I mean, sure it was complicated at first, but like you said back at the frat house,” Jimin continues, smiling at him gently. “Love knows how to endure and eventually everything paid off. The only complications that me and Hobi and Yoongi hyung have these
days are our sleeping arrangements since Yoongi hyung’s bed isn’t even a queen size.”
Taehyung snorts. Though he has to admit that he’s beginning to wonder how a polyamory would work out for him– not that he thinks that the twins would go for it, of course,
since one: they’re brothers. Womb mates. Surely it’d be awkward, and kind of a sin, to be in one with your brother.
Plus they were competitive as heck, not even a minute after he agreed to go on a date with each of them, they’re already bickering about who’s going to take him
out on a better date. So it wouldn’t work.
Being gay is already one thing. Being in a polyamory is another. But being in a polyamorous relationship with brothers? Taehyung could already see his cell in hell with his name on it.
“I guess you’re right, Jimin.” he eventually says. “I’ll just see how it plays out on– on our date and see how it goes.”
“Of course I am! It’s why I was even offended you didn’t tell me in the first place, cause who else is going to give you great advice?” Jimin grins at him,
pulling him by the arm, causing him to fall on top of him before Jimin entangles his limbs around him affectionately. “But really, though. I’m really so happy for you, Taetae.”
Taehyung scoffs as he attempts to detach himself from Jimin’s clutches,
but he can’t help but feel endeared by the other’s excitement on his new dating adventure. “Get off me, Mimi.” he whines weakly.
“No!” Jimin says, still hugging him. “I’m gonna maximize all our cuddle time before Suji steals them from me.”
“I’m pretty sure you’re still gonna get cuddles even though me and–” Taehyung trails off.
Jimin snorts, not realizing that he paused mid sentence. “Pretty sure she won’t let me go near you once it’s official,” he says.
“She’s been crushing on you since forever. I bet she’s gonna make up for all the lost time.”
Taehyung starts to feel heavy again. Burdened. He completely forgot about that date his father asked him to go on that morning with Suji.
He was just too caught up with the twins that he had forgotten, too caught up in his own bliss to remember what he should be doing.
He tries to swallow the lump in his throat. “Uh, how did you know by the way?” Taehyung asks, feeling uneasy. “About the, uhm, date?”
“Your mom texted me,” Jimin says, finally untangling himself from Taehyung and laying down on the bed, hands behind his head as he looks at him. “She asked me how I was doing, and she asked if I could help you plan that date you were going with Suji.”
Of course his mom would make sure that he actually goes on that date he didn’t intend to go on. Of course she would take matters into her own hands.
Of course, he thought bitterly.
“Plus I saw the youth leaders’ GC,” Jimin continues, oblivious of his growing turmoil. “Heard you were going on that hike retreat too. Way to hit two birds with one stone, Taetae.”
Taehyung smiles at his grinning friend weakly. Starting to feel conflicted over the situation.
Part of him is telling him to just tell Jimin the truth. Just say the words out loud so his friend could help him look for a way out of this mess. Help him with the real issue at hand.
But then he remembers that warning from his parents earlier about separating him from Jimin
because they’re starting to think that Jimin might turn out to be a bad influence due to his church absences. He guesses his mom called to check on Jimin herself and perhaps give him this task to prove that he’s a good influence on Taehyung.
Fuck, he thought. This just keeps getting more and more complicated and the more he wants to tell his truth, the more pieces of his tongue get cut off. He’s now starting to wonder if there’s ever a chance he could be more honest. Be more himself and choose his own choices.
“You don’t look too happy, Tae.” Jimin frowns, ever the most observant.
He tries to smile at him. Back to pretending once again. He said earlier that being with the twins was like pretending to be someone else,
but the more Taehyung thinks about it, maybe… maybe he’s just pretending to be the perfect pastor’s son all along.
“I am.” Taehyung says– Taehyung lies.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
Days passed by in a hazy blur once the weekdays arrived, and in just a blink of an eye, it’s Friday already.
Taehyung can feel the exhaustion hugging his bones due to the busy week he had finalizing some things for their talent show that’s in a week,
attending his classes, catching up on some of his projects and essays, and taking care of the church’s youth club’s hike retreat that’s set to take place on the weekend after the talent show.
He’s beat. Tired is a huge understatement but instead of lounging in his dorm,
or perhaps, being dolled up by Jimin so they can go to the next party that his friend is invited to, he’s spending the start of his supposed weekend at the library studying for one of his classes because another test came back with not that high marks– something his parents would
not be too happy about since he just promised them that he’d put a little more effort in his studies.
Plus, he kind of wants to be alone right now because he doesn’t want to bump into one of the twins. – The twins who have been hinting about the date that he agreed to go on
all throughout the week.
When Taehyung met up with them on Tuesday and Wednesday with Jeongguk and Jungkook respectively, they had each been asking him nonstop about what he liked to do for fun so they could better plan their unscheduled dates.
Treating it as some type of competition.
Taehyung indulged them with some answers and said he likes to play video games, paint if he has the time and supplies, or that he’s fine with literally anything since he also likes to try out new things– all of which they nodded to
determinedly, making him feel endeared.
But secretly, he’s also feeling a bit guilty because of another date– a date that he didn’t want to go on with Suji. In a way, his packed schedule was like a blessing in disguise because he used that as an excuse to push their date back,
something the twins didn’t mind since Taehyung didn’t even have to act to show how stressed he is due to his tasks.
After that misunderstanding with Jimin, his best friend threw in some suggestions as to where he could take Suji out on a date and even coached him as to how
he could ask her out. Even going to the lengths of Jimin pretending to be her and denying Taehyung every time he’d play along to his friend’s skit. (He wishes Suji would deny him too but he thinks it’s less likely.)
Taehyung is honestly at a loss. He remembers what Jimin said about just going with the flow and just letting things play out, but he can’t help but think that he’s being a little unfair, not just to Suji, but to the twins too because he’s still nowhere close to coming out
and he can’t look for a way to get him out of that date he’s supposed to ask Suji on at the risk of his parents pulling him out of college and separating him from Jimin.
There’s just too many at risk. Too much to lose. And Taehyung cares too much to admit it to anyone,
but he pretends all is well. He’s a master at that anyway. But he does have to admit, it gets so heavy sometimes. It gets so lonely dealing with everything by himself and saying he’s alright when he’s close to breaking down any second.
He thought that things will be clearer for him as time passes by but it only became more hazy and hard to navigate. And as much as he hates spending his Friday afternoon studying, it’s also nice to escape everything for a bit. Forget about the decisions he needs to make
and the steps he needs to take before continuing to trudge on his journey.
His phone has been ringing with calls and texts for the last hour. All from Jimin, and of course, the twins asking him where he is. All of which Taehyung ignored since, again, he kind of wants to be alone
and he’s still deciding as to how he can stall the twins from going on their dates until he deals with the whole Suji issue.
But life has never favored Taehyung (Or maybe it does), since when he was just about to stand and get another book about human anatomy,
he saw someone drop a bag on the chair across from him, making him look up to find Jeongguk looking at him with a smile on his face. Clad in a black shirt, some loose dark pants, glasses perched on his nose and long hair brushed on the sides.
“Hey, Tae,” he says, sitting down on the empty chair across from him. “We were looking for you.”
Taehyung swallows his sigh. Though, he has to admit, the comfort that Jeongguk comes with relaxes him easily. “Hey,” he replies. Attempting a smile. “What are you doing here?”
Jeongguk scoffs at him lightly as he cards his fingers through his hair. “I should be asking you that,” he says. “What are you doing in the library on a Friday evening? Don’t you have a free day tomorrow?”
“Studying,” he answers glumly, lifting up his notebook to show him some notes. “What else would I be doing here?”
The other hums. “I dunno,” Jeongguk replies. “Thought you were hiding from us or something.”
Well, he isn’t wrong, but he can’t tell him that.
“Nah,” he says, avoiding his gaze. “I needed to do some reading for one of my classes. One of my tests came back with just a passing grade.”
Jeongguk scrunches his eyebrows at him. “Isn’t that a good thing?” he asks, tilting his head to the side. Looking like a puppy, making
“Well, if you’re an ordinary student then I’m sure it is,” he replies. “But if you’re someone on the dean’s list–”
“Fine fine, no need to rub it in.” Jeongguk jokes lightly, grinning at him.
“You’re a dean’s lister too, Gukkie.” Taehyung points his pen at him
as he rolls his eyes fondly.
The other shrugs. “You’re forgetting that I study dance and you study all this medical shit,” he replies, grimacing at his books. “Plus you hate your major so that’s plus points.”
Taehyung snorts. “I don’t hate it,” he reasons.
“It’s just… not my first choice.”
Jeongguk hums, unconvinced, before he reaches for the book in front of Taehyung and closes it, making the latter scoff and try to open it again but Jeongguk puts a hand over it teasingly.
“Jeongguk!” Taehyung whines, trying to lift Jeongguk’s hand up. “I have to study!”
“No, you don’t,” Jeongguk says sternly, not letting the book go and trying to steal it away from Taehyung’s vice grip. “You need to take a break.”
Taehyung clicks his tongue at him. “I can’t,” he replies. “I told my parents I’ll do better in school and I can’t–”
“You’re already doing great,” Jeongguk says, successfully stealing the book and placing it on the chair beside him.
“You’ve been working yourself to the bone for the past week. Cool down for a second.”
“I can’t,” Taehyung says, massaging his temples then leaning on the table. He’s only realizing how tired he is after Jeongguk stole his book away.
“I have so much to do. Sometimes I wish I had a twin so they could do half my work.”
Jeongguk snorts. “Well, that would have been interesting.” he mutters under his breath, causing Taehyung to scoff and look at him.
“Jeonggukkie, please.” he begs. “I really need to get this done so I could at least get four hours of sleep tonight before I start on some more work.”
Jeongguk looks at him as if he’s assessing the bags under his eyes, the state of his disheveled hair and clothes before he sighs
and reaches across the table with both hands to hold one of Taehyung’s hands. A concerned look appearing on his face. “C’mon, Tae.” he says softly.
Taehyung blushes on cue, looking around the library to see if everyone’s there but only to find the librarian snoozing from her
spot behind her desk. “Jeongguk–” he whines.
“Tae.” Jeongguk says firmly as he looks him in the eye. “You need to take a break.”
“I will,” he reasons, finding so much comfort in the way Jeongguk is gently massaging his hand. “I just have so much to do right now, and I-”
“And they can wait.” Jeongguk interrupts. “Tell me this. When was the last time you actually did things for yourself instead of doing things for someone else?”
Taehyung huffs. Honestly, it really shouldn’t be hard since it’s a simple question but the more he thinks about it,
thinks of when the last time he lazed in bed to watch his korean dramas or pick up a pencil to draw something, he comes up with nothing. Lately, it’s been all about church, school, clubs and being dragged along by Jimin to go to one party after another.
Heck, he can’t even recall the last time he had a full eight hours of sleep.
Jeongguk seems to know, like always, and smiles at him. “See?” he says smugly. “You can’t even think of the answer.”
“It’s not that, it’s just,” Taehyung tries to say. “I’ve just been busy with more
important things. That’s all”
“Me too” Jeongguk points out. Shooting him a significant look. “Uni alone is already a lot of work and you have ten other things that you’re taking care of on top of that, but even if thats the case, you should always try to find time for yourself.”
“Like I said, Guk.” Taehyung sighs. “I’m used to sacrificing my time for others. It’s practically in my DNA. I mean… Church kid since birth. Right?”
“I get it. Really. I get that helping others and making sure everyone is happy comes naturally to you, Tae,
but you shouldn’t overdo it,” Jeongguk replies. “Remember, the most important relationship you should have is your relationship with yourself.”
Taehyung purses his lips. Sometimes he wonders if God put the twins in his life to serve as his guardian angels or something.
His someones to remind him to slow down and to take care of himself. Enjoy life a little more.
He thinks of his relationship with himself, or his lack of one that is, and wonders if that’s the reason why he feels like a fish out of water most times.
If his selflessness was what’s causing his melancholia.
Before, he used to serve out of joy and his willingness. But these days, it’s been more like an obligation than anything else. A hammer to knee reaction where if someone asks, he automatically says yes
with no questions asked.
He didn’t realize he was frowning until Jeongguk, yet again, brushed the scrunched on his eyebrows and smiled at him gently. “Don’t worry, Tae,” Jeongguk says, tone oozing with gentleness and reassurance.
“It’s never too late to learn how to love yourself a little more.”
Taehyung sighs. At that point, he had no reason to tell the other no, so he pushes his notebook away with his free hand and squeezes that other’s hand gratefully.
“I guess you’re right,” he replies with a small smile. “I think I should do something for myself for a change.”
Jeongguk grins at him wide, eyes twinkling at him. “I’m glad you said that because–” he says eagerly.
“Well you might not remember the last thing you did something you wanted, but I do.”
“Oh?” Taehyung raises an eyebrow at him. “And what exactly is that, then?”
“I know you wanted to go on that date. With me,” Jeongguk says.
“Well, me and Kook but he’s not here right now and I am. So what do you say? Would you go out with me?”
His smile slightly falters, but it manages to stay in the end since the butterflies have gone back to their fluttering as he looks at that boyish smile on Jeongguk’s face.
Plus he’s right. He does want to go out on a date with him. “Sure” he says, biting his lips to suppress his smile.
“Good.” Jeongguk nods, standing up and grabbing his bag, perching it over his shoulder and reaching to hold Taehyung’s hand. The butterflies go wild.
“Now, let’s go.”
“Right now?” he asks but standing up and retrieving his things on the table with one hand nonetheless since Jeongguk wasn’t letting go of him.
“Right now.” Jeongguk confirms, pulling him along once Taehyung has his satchel on his shoulder
and half running outside the library. “C’mon let’s go!”
Taehyung smiles as he allows himself to be pulled by the other, feeling elated and fluttery as he and Jeongguk sprint across the quad hand in hand to a direction that he doesn’t know where.
But it doesn’t matter, he thinks. As long as Jeongguk is there.
It’s evening already, the sun long gone and the lamp posts are exuding a warm orange glow. Unlike most days, the quad was empty since everyone else was out to enjoy the weekend, making the campus look hauntingly
beautiful with its buildings bathing in dim lights from afar.
He and Jeongguk run across the grass together, with the elder running a couple steps ahead and Taehyung following behind with their hands intertwined. Something that just makes Taehyung feel so safe, so happy.
It’s something so simple. It’s just holding a hand. But it says and feels so much.
He guesses that this is what love kind of feels like. Yes, it’s too early to tell but Taehyung has a gut feeling that it won’t take him long to decide if it is.
They slow down once they reach the art department’s building. Like the rest of campus, it’s empty and dim with only the lamps outside lighting up the inside of it. They enter the building, still hand in hand and walk through the dark hallways together.
Taehyung finds himself squeezing Jeongguk’s hand as they bypass one door after another, confused as to what they’re even doing there in the first place when they were supposed to go on their date.
“You’re not gonna murder me, right?” Taehyung jokes, looking at the elder man
as they round a corner together. “The school is empty and this hallway is so dark. It looks like the perfect place to murder somebody.”
Jeongguk looks over his shoulder and smirks. “I hope I don’t.” he says secretively, making Taehyung lift an eyebrow up.
But before he can question him any further, they stop at a door and Jeongguk pulls a key out of his pocket. Shooting it inside the lock before pushing the door open to reveal a finely lit room filled with paintings and sculptures displayed and some tables pushed to the side
that had art materials on them.
Taehyung finds himself letting go of Jeongguk’s hand to look around with eyes wide as saucers as takes in the room. The sight of what could’ve been flashing right before him. – this could’ve been his classroom,
his art could’ve been one of those masterpieces displayed if only he had the courage to tell his parents about his passions.
His eyes lock with Jeongguk, who’s looking at him with a smile, making Taehyung clear his throat and lick his lips shyly.
“Uh, are we picking something up?” he asks.
Jeongguk only smiles and lets his bag fall on the floor before he gestures to Taehyung to follow him further inside.
“Nope,” he says, stopping by the middle of the room and gesturing for Taehyung to say before going
towards the table that had art materials there. “We’re making art.”
Taehyung lifts an eyebrow as he watches Jeongguk grab a sketchbook and pencil, before the latter returns to him and hands him the materials. “Uh okay,” he replies, unsure.
Looking from the sketchbook to Jeongguk. “Where’s your sketchbook?”
“I don’t need one.” Jeongguk shrugs.
“But I thought we’re making art, though?” he asks, watching as Jeongguk pulls a chair and pushes Taehyung to sit on it.
“Nope. Just you,” the other replies.
“I’m going to check off one of your wishlists on our date today.”
Taehyung raises an eyebrow. “What wishlist are you– Jeongguk!” he exclaims, lifting up the sketchbook in his hands to hide his burning face when Jeongguk suddenly takes his shirt off.
“What in Christ’s name are you doing?”
“What do you think?” Jeongguk asks. Taehyung could practically hear the smirk that’s accompanying the other’s sultry tone.
“I-I don’t know,” he stutters, hands gripping the sketchbook tightly.
“But- but whatever it is, can we please do it with your shirt on.”
Jeongguk chuckles at him, and instead of doing what Taehyung requested, he senses the other moving around and could hear more of his clothes rustling on the floor, making his face heat some more.
Holy shit. He is going to murder him.
“Please put your clothes back on!” he begs weakly.
“If I put them back on, how else are you going to start on that nude drawing you wanted to try?” Jeongguk retorts, making Taehyung’s face flush.
Fuck, he thought. Holy fuck.
“Holy fuck.” he ends up saying, making Jeongguk laugh.
“I’m guessing that’s good?” Jeongguk asks, before Taehyung hears his footsteps approaching him and sees a tattooed hand gripping the sketchbook in his hands and pulling it down.
Taehyung starts to pray under his breath and closes his eyes. Asking for forgiveness and wishes for strength to carry on because he has a feeling that he might not get out of this alive. Or at least, sane.
Jeongguk successfully takes the sketchbook out of his hands and Taehyung finds himself looking at a (Thank God) half-naked Jeongguk that’s only wearing a pair of C*lvin Kl*in briefs.
He blushes as his eyes begin to climb up– from Jeongguk’s eight pack to his strong
and defined chest, his thick neck, strong jawline and dark eyes looking down at him.
Taehyung’s pretty sure he resembles a tomato right now, but honestly, he can’t be blamed since the embodiment of sin is right before his very eyes. He gulps.
“I- I don’t think I can do this,” he mumbles, trying to focus on just Jeongguk’s eyes and not his bulging biceps or his thick wonderful thighs.
The corner of Jeongguk’s lips twist sinfully. “Of course you can,” he says, before taking a few steps back to give Taehyung
the full view– not that it was any better, because again, Jeongguk is just so beautiful. A walking daydream.
Despite his half naked state and his growing arousal, Taehyung can’t find it in himself to look away and appreciate Jeongguk more and the art decorating his right arm,
the muscles he worked hard on, his long silky dark hair and his eyes that are shining with mirth.
Plus the fact that they’re all alone, like they’re in a world of their own, makes everything much more intimate. So intimate.
“Warn a guy in advance next time,” Taehyung mumbles weakly. “You’re giving me a heart attack.”
Jeongguk grins at him from ear to ear and throws the sketchbook back in his direction. Taehyung catches it and places it on his lap, not knowing what to do with his hands since the
other is overwhelming him in a good way.
“I hope it’s the good kind of heart attack,” he replies, rubbing his hands together and placing his hands on his hips. “So should we get started? How do you want me?”
Holy fuck part four, he thinks. Jeongguk saying that should be counted
as a sin, Taehyung thinks. Feeling his cheeks mimic the temperature of hell.
“You can’t say things like that,” Taehyung mutters under his breath. “You can’t just do this and cause me stress like this. I thought you took me out so I could relax?”
Jeongguk snorts. “You said drawing relaxes you,” he replies, amused. “And you were the one who said you wanted to try this.”
“I know what I said, Gukkie,” Taehyung whines. “But I don’t know. I’m not so sure now.”
“Do you prefer girls?” Jeongguk retorts with a laugh.
“Shut up.” Taehyung rolls his eyes at him, fiddling with his fingers. “I’m serious, Gukkie.”
“I’m serious too.” Jeongguk replies. “If you’re worried about me or something, then don’t. I’m used to being undressed anyway.”
Not helping, Taehyung thought,
as he continued to stare at his nails. Still shy. He knows it’s nothing but art and is completely normal for artists to do, but this is Jeongguk– he isn’t just anyone. Plus, he doesn’t want to admit that he hasn’t seen anyone besides himself naked before.
He hears Jeongguk sigh, though it's more patient than anything else. “Tell you what,” he says, making Taehyung look at him tentatively. “I’ll keep my underwear on. There’s plenty of other opportunities for the rest later, right?”
Taehyung gulps at the implications of another time, but he nods at him. Thinking he could deal with this state of his undress for the meantime. Baby steps and all.
“Fine.” Taehyung agrees, placing his bag down and taking out one of his pencils from his pencil case
then sitting up straight to find Jeongguk taking his glasses off and placing it over his clothes.
“Do you want me to pose a certain way?” he asks as he stands in the middle once again.
“N-no need,” Taehyung replies, opening the sketchpad and setting it back on his lap.
“You- you can just stand there or sit. It doesn’t matter.”
“I’ll stand,” Jeongguk replies, standing up straight and looking at Taehyung.
Taehyung nods at him slowly, breathing deeply as he holds his pencil and looks at Jeongguk again.
Staring at his face and focusing on the shape of his head, the line of his jaw, the curve of his lips and so on before he returns to his sketchpad and begins to draw. Shifting his gaze from his sketchbook to the male from time to time, and feeling some of his nerves ebb away
as he gets used to the other’s nakedness.
And despite how he felt before starting, Taehyung begins to feel the stress of the last couple of weeks– the last couple of months melt as he lets his brain shut down and let his hands take over for him.
It’s been awhile since he
last properly drew something and only settling for quick doodles at the corner of his notebooks during class to sate his inner artist’s needs, so it’s nice, it’s healing to get to make some art again after so long. It’s nice to be reminded of what he loves to do.
“If you need a break, let me know,” Taehyung says after some time as he starts to draw Jeongguk’s arms and torso next. “I’m nearly done, I’m just working on your body.”
“Take all the time you need, Tae.” Jeongguk tells him patiently. “I’m good. Don’t worry about me.”
“Thank you, Jeongguk.” he tells him with a small smile, hands still busy with the drawing. “And we can talk too if you want. I can multitask and I’m done with your face anyway.”
“Oh okay,” Jeongguk replies, nodding at him slowly but body staying unmoving.
“So, what made you like art?”
Taehyung hums, recalling the first time he picked up a crayon and a blank piece of paper when he was younger. “Well, initially I liked it because it was fun,” he starts to say.
“It lets me interpret things the way I see or envision the world, you know?”
Jeongguk hums at him, listening intently.
“When I was a kid, I used to be quite the oddball.” Taehyung chuckles as he starts drawing Jeongguk’s arms.
“I was teased and bullied a lot of times for it too.”
“Who? I’ll beat them up?” Jeongguk replies lightly, causing Taehyung to snort since it’s what his twin said the other week.
“Just some old classmates. I don’t know where they are now so no need to put these muscles to use,”
he replies softly. “And besides, if it wasn’t for them, I wouldn’t have retorted to drawing or painting. Art helps me escape sometimes so I can make a world of my own. It allows me to make things more beautiful than what they are in real life.”
“So you’re saying you’re gonna make me pretty?” Jeongguk asks with a grin.
Taehyung rolls his eyes at him fondly. “You- you already are,” he says, effectively making the apples of Jeongguk’s cheeks pink. A small win. “I’m just immortalizing it.”
“Keep feeding my ego like that and I’ll make you draw me everyday,” Jeongguk replies.
“I’m not opposed.” Taehyung laughs, starting on Jeongguk’s tattoos next. “You’re a natural.”
“Thank you.” the other says, wiggling his eyebrows.
“I asked for a friend’s advice on how to do this modeling thing, so I won’t be as fussy while you draw.”
His hand pauses lining up Jeongguk’s tattoos as he looks at him and smiles, touched. “You did?” he asks.
“Yeah.” Jeongguk nods. “They were also the one who lent me the keys to the art room, and they told me which sketchpad to buy, so I hope it’s good enough for you. I wasn’t sure if you’d like something bigger or not, so I settled with the standard size instead.”
Warmth. That’s what Taehyung could feel inside. So much of it that it seeps out of the tip of his fingers and spills out of the smile on his face.
He’s so touched, he feels so appreciated and it’s such a simple gesture.
It’s simply just putting some thought into their date,
but Taehyung could not help but be overwhelmed by his thoughtfulness. Not just in getting to know how to be a good model or to pick out the best type of sketchbook, but it’s him knowing when Taehyung needs a quick breather. It’s him taking the time to know what Taehyung loves
It’s everything he could ask for.
“It’s perfect, Jeongguk.” he tells him. You’re perfect, was what he wanted to say.
Jeongguk smiles at him, big and bright. “Good,” he says. “Cause it’s what you deserve.”
There goes the butterflies again.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
If you told Kim Taehyung that he went out on a date with a man like Jeon Jeongguk a month ago, he would have pointed you into the direction of the nearest confession booth. Maybe he would have done some counseling too to make sure that the person
who told him that is in good mental state, or whatever.
Because the Taehyung from a month ago is different from the Taehyung today. And the Taehyung today, despite how busy his Saturday has been due to his meetings and his studying, has not stopped smiling to himself whenever
he remembers that date he had with Jeongguk the previous night.
The thought is dizzying if he’s being honest. It’s kind of hard to grasp, no matter how unexplainably happy he is, cause he never imagined himself to act on his desires and actually go for it.
Take that leap of faith and go out with a guy, but there he was.
Back on his cloud, drifting around campus as if he’s floating and smiling at everyone who looked his way. Sure, he got a few confused looks in return but Taehyung could not care any less.
He’s happy and that’s all that matters to him at that moment.
His and Jeongguk’s date lasted well into the night. After drawing the elder male and tucking his drawing of him in his sketchbook, they went to get some dinner at some fast food restaurant and talked some more about
whatever they could think of until the restaurant was closing up and was kicking them out.
Jeongguk walked him back to the dorm like always, walking with a drag in his steps, and Taehyung suspected that it was because he was trying to make use of the remaining time they had– not
that he can blame him cause Taehyung was also counting the remaining minutes they had left.
Once they were in front of his dorm building, Jeongguk smiled at him big and wide. Told him he hoped he had a great time and hoped they could do it again.
Taehyung replied with a shy yet bold, “Well you promised me more days like these, right?” that got the smile on the other’s face widening even more and replying with an eager, “Consider it done, then.”
So in short, it was nothing but perfect.
It was nothing like that coffee date he went on Suji before where he was eager to leave and reluctant to share anything personal about himself. Everything was as easy as breathing, natural.
After getting some dinner with his club mates and after reminding Jimin to go to church
the next day since his friend was staying over at Yoongi’s place again, Taehyung finds himself walking to the dorm alone. The euphoria he was running on slightly dwindling down since he remembers that he has to go to church too.
But only for a bit, since
he finds a familiar looking bike– big bike parked outside his dorm building and certain male leaning on it, clad in tight black pants with rips on the knees, some combat boots, a black leather jacket over a gray plaid shirt underneath and a bucket hat on top of his head.
The fluttering in Taehyung’s chest returns with a vengeance when he sees him, him being Jungkook, grin when he finds Taehyung walking to him and standing up to meet him halfway in slow strides.
Taehyung finds himself biting his lips as Jungkook. Church going to the back of his head as he stops in front of the other male, finding twinkling eyes under the bucket hat. “Do you come here often?” Taehyung jokes, smiling while crossing his arms.
Jungkook smirks at him. “I hope I start to,” he replies confidently. Before he unashamedly begins looking at him from head to toe, checking him out. “You look pretty today, angel.”
“I’m only wearing sweats and a hoodie,” Taehyung mutters under his breath, shaking his head to control the sudden rush on his cheeks due to the compliment, the new pet name and the implication that Jungkook wants to come over to his place more often.
Talk about going all in.
“And?” Jungkook snorts. “Doesn’t make what I said any less true.”
Taehyung purses his lips and looks at him suspiciously. “Are you flirting with me?” he asks.
“Not that bright today, huh?” the other teases, making Taehyung roll his eyes at him.
“But if the compliments and the pet name wasn’t telling enough, then yes. I am flirting with you.”
Taehyung is no longer a human. He is nothing but heat. A puff of hot smoke with legs due to how Jungkook is making him feel.
Still, he tries to keep his composure and smiles at him. “Well, thanks for the clarification,” he mutters. “You don’t look so bad yourself.”
Jeongguk grins and does a comical twirl to show him his outfit. “You like it?” he asks. “It’s my date outfit.”
Taehyung stares at him, beginning to feel even more suspicious. “Date outfit?”
“Yeah,” the other replies. “For /our/ date.”
Again. Puff of hot smoke with legs.
“Oh,” Taehyung mumbles, tucking his hair behind his ear as licks his lips. “I wasn’t aware that I had a date today.”
“Well now you do.” Jungkook smiles at him. “If you’re okay with it, that is. It’s fine if you want to reschedule.”
Taehyung hums as he thinks of an answer. To be honest, he still has to go to church the next morning and do some quick reading before going to bed,
but he remembers that lesson that Jeongguk had taught him the night before about choosing himself first. And if he wants to compare his choice between studying or going out on another hot date, the latter outweighs the other, so Taehyung shrugs and says, “I’m in.”
“Good answer,” Jungkook says, holding up an arm, to which Taehyung grabs with a fond snort. “And as beautiful as you look in your sweats and hoodie, you kind of have to dress up to this place I’m taking you.”
“And where, may I ask, are you taking me this evening?” he asks.
“It’s a surprise.” Jungkook winks, leading him inside the dorms.
“Can I get a clue so I could at least dress appropriately?”
“Well, I won’t strip for you like Guk did,” the other says with a scoff. Looking peeved, making Taehyung giggle at him.
But he soon regrets it when Jungkook looks at him, corner of his lips twisting up and adds a sultry, “Unless you want to, that is.”
Taehyung pinches his arms over the jacket, making Jungkook laugh. “Don’t make me regret coming with you.” he threatens weakly as they enter the elevators together.
Though, he has a gut feeling that he won’t.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
After driving halfway across Seoul and into an area in Yongsan where several bars and clubs were lined next to each other, Jungkook finally parks his motorcycle in front of one of them where a purple and blue neon sign that reads HEAVEN, the name of the club, is written on it,
making Taehyung snort in amusement at the irony of it.
“You’re taking me to heaven, huh?” Taehyung asks as soon as he takes his helmet off and looks at the club’s exterior where a white gate is placed in front of the entrance where two bouncers dressed in white were guarding it.
“You sure you can get inside?” he jokes, making Jungkook snort.
“Pretty sure you can take me as your plus one,” Jungkook replies as he climbs out of his motorcycle and helps Taehyung next. Grabbing the helmet from him and hanging it around his arm next to the helmet he wore
before holding Taehyung’s hand to help him climb out next.
“Well since you’re a gentleman, I guess you can tag along.” Taehyung smiles, looking at the long line next to the gate and gesturing to it with a nod of his head.
“But I think we have to wait for a bit before we can go inside.”
“No need,” Jungkook says, pulling him so they can go inside. “I brought their nicest angel with me so I think we can skip that.”
Taehyung rolls his eyes at him, cheeks still not immune to the blushes, and allows Jungkook to pull him and bypass the long queue of other partygoers that were waiting outside until they reach the white gates together.
He expects them to tell off and to go to the back of the line, but instead one of the bouncers simply nods in Jungkook’s direction, not even asking for identification, and opens the gates for them so they could pass through a velvet blue curtain behind the bouncers.
pats one of them on the shoulder and pulls Taehyung inside a foggy hallway lit with only floor lights leading to some stairs at the end.
“Stairway to heaven.” Jungkook explains with a grin as he holds Taehyung’s hand and intertwines it with his before climbing up together.
“Very witty,” Taehyung comments under his breath as he follows Jungkook behind. Holding onto his hand with a vice grip since he can’t exactly see his steps due to the darkness. “And are you sure this is heaven? I don’t think heaven was described to be this dark.”
“Well, we’re not in heaven yet, Tae.” Jungkook says over his shoulder as they continue. “I believe this is what you call, uh, what was it again? Purge or something?”
Taehyung giggles. “Purgatory.” he suffices, making Jungkook nod.
“Yeah, that.” he says. “Sorry, the christian book I borrowed at the library wasn’t very detailed.”
Taehyung raises an eyebrow at him as they stop at the top of the stairs where music is beginning to bounce through the walls. “Why were you reading a christian book?” he asks.
“Thought you and Guk didn’t believe in that?”
“We don’t,” Jungkook replies. “But you do, and it didn’t hurt to know more about the topic so I picked it up a week ago.”
“That’s sweet of you,” Taehyung replies softly.
“But you didn’t have to do that. We don’t have to talk about my faith or anything.”
“I know,” the other says. “But I want to.”
Taehyung only smiles at him widely before Jungkook pushes another door open to reveal the inside of the club.
Unsurprisingly, Taehyung hasn’t been to a club yet before for obvious reasons, but he’s heard enough from Jimin’s own personal experiences to imagine what it could look like.
And from the looks of it, he decides that his imagination wasn’t too far off since it’s exactly
how he pictured it. – A vast, dimly lit room with only different colored strobe lights lighting up the place, a bar on one side where alcohol of every kind is displayed on the shelves behind it and some plush couches on the other side for people to sit.
A DJ booth where a huge led screen is behind it and in the middle, is a large dance floor where people crowded and danced as the DJ dropped the beats.
“What do you think?” Jungkook asks from beside him, making Taehyung look to find the elder male looking at him wearily.
Taehyung smiles at him reassuringly and squeezes his hand. “No. It’s okay.” he replies. “It’s just new, but not something I’d say no to.”
Jungkook nods, corner of his lips twisting up before he pulls him to the direction of the couches.
And as they make their way there, Taehyung could not help but notice a few lingering looks in their direction. Not that he blames them because Jungkook looks… heavenly, to say the least. But he couldn’t help but notice that he, too, was receiving the stares and not just from
women but men too. One of them even winked at him suggestively when Taehyung caught their eye, making him look away to stare at the floor and focus on the hand that was gripping his own.
Soon, he and Jungkook are seated on one of the white couches located on the side.
A seat that was reserved for them, actually, since as soon as he and Jungkook arrived, one of the servers dressed in skimpy clothing, points them to it and takes the reserved sign away.
“Are you some kind of VIP?” Taehyung asks, getting comfortable in his seat and looking down
on the menu.
“Like I said, I have God’s best angel with me,” Jungkook replies with a smile as he looks down on his menu. “So want to get some drinks or do you want to dance?”
Taehyung looks at the crowded dance floor and frowns.
He thinks he’s gonna need a drink (or five) before he can work up the courage to do his dance moves in public.
“Drinks it is, then.” Jungkook laughs, standing up to go to the bar on the other side. “Anything you like? My treat.”
“Nothing too strong please,” Taehyung replies, starting to feel a bit uncomfortable at the thought of being left alone. “And not beer. I don’t really like the taste.”
“Okay, I got you.” Jungkook nods before he squeezes himself through the litany of dancing bodies in the middle
to buy them both drinks and leaving Taehyung alone to entertain himself.
He chooses that time to survey his surroundings and to go people watching. Eyes finding their way to the dancefloor to look at people dancing with their partners.
Men dancing with women, women dancing with women, and men dancing with men blissfully. Unjudged. Something that’s so refreshing in Taehyung’s eyes since if this were to happen in church, he’s sure they’d get at least ten eye rolls.
And actually, the more he stares at the dancefloor, the more he notices that the men dancing with other men ratio the other pairs more. Something that had Taehyung raising an eyebrow in suspicion before a flash of glitter catches his eyes
and he finds himself looking at a handsome waiter, dressed in a sequin dress, holding up a tray and setting some drinks down on the table. Smiling at his patrons with his lipstick smudged lips.
Taehyung is not one to judge. Honest he’s not.
But he can’t help but stare with his mouth agape, more out of awe than anything else, as he follows the waiter around with a laser gaze. Strutting confidently and head held up high and no one– absolutely no one doing a double take, which makes it twice as more spectacular.
He begins to connect the dots slowly as he takes all his observations in. Scanning the area one more time until he finally finds that one thing to confirm his suspicions. The one thing being the strip poles located next to the DJ booth where people, correction: /men,/ were
dancing and twirling around as a crowd of men cheered and threw bills at them.
And as if Taehyung needed any more proof, a guy around his age sits next to him on the couch and shoots him a wide smile that has Taehyung moving away from him slowly.
“Hey,” the guy says. Tone flirty. “You new around here?”
Taehyung thinks he looks like a fish out of water due to the number of times he opened and closed his mouth at the lack of anything to say.
Flustered that some guy, other than the twins, would approach him and show him their interest. /Interest for him,/ that is.
“I- I, uh,” Taehyung stutters, feeling his hands begin to sweat. “I-”
“Back off. He’s my date.” Jungkook suddenly appears, holding up their drinks and frowning at the male sitting next to Taehyung. “Find someone else.”
The guy only sighs disappointedly and stands to walk away. Completely unperturbed at the idea that they– two men–
were out on a date.
Sure it may be common for others, but for a church boy like him? He feels like Jungkook brought him to another dimension. A good one where everyone is seen as equal. A dimension where you’re free to be who you are and be with whoever you want to be with.
Taehyung kind of wants to stay there.
“Sorry about that,” Jungkook says, setting their drinks down on the table and sliding a tall glass filled with blue liquid in Taehyung’s direction.
“I forgot to say that people are like vultures here. The moment they see you alone, they pounce.”
Taehyung, still a little mind blown at everything he’s witnessed in the past ten minutes, responds by taking a huge swig from the drink that Jungkook bought for him.
Surprisingly liking the zesty and tangy taste that overpowers the bitterness of the alcohol it’s mixed with.
“Guess you’re thirsty.” he hears Jungkook say as he puts his drink down on the table, and finds it half empty already.
Taehyung turns to look at him with wide, accusing eyes. “Jungkook,” he says, his frown looking more like a pout than anything else.
Jungkook chuckles at him. “What?” he asks
Taehyung leans close to him, gesturing for him to come close so he could whisper something in his ear, to which the other obliges with a fond snort.
“Are we in a gay club?” he whispers.
Jungkook laughs and pulls away from him as he shakes his head. “You don’t have to whisper it, Tae.” he grins. “There’s nothing wrong with it.”
“You haven’t answered my question!” Taehyung whines. “Are we?”
Jungkook smirks at him devilishly, before he nods. “Yeah,” he confirms. “We’re in a gay club.”
Taehyung downs his drink again. “Oh god,” he murmurs, making Jungkook chuckle and reach to hold his hand.
“Don’t worry about it, Tae,” Jungkook tells him reassuringly.
“This place is pretty far so no one from Uni will see us here plus I’m sure none of these people go to church, so you’re good.”
Taehyung is pretty sure that no goes to church here too, thanks.
“It’s not that,” he tells him.
“I’m just surprised, but I promise it’s not in a negative way or anything. I’m just so new to all this and it all feels so surreal to be here.”
“Well take it slow, baby,” Jungkook scolds him gently. “Especially on the drinks. That’s strong stuff you gulped there.”
“Sorry.” Taehyung blushes, licking his lips. “I’m just, I don’t know, a bit excited and a bit scared I guess. I mean, did you see that guy wearing a dress? No one blinked and I thought he’s gorgeous!”
Jungkook snorts at him, shooting him a smile that causes his nose to scrunch.
“I’m a little biased cause I think you’re the most gorgeous here, Tae,” he tells him unashamedly. “But yeah, he’s pretty too I guess.”
Taehyung scoffs. “Did you not see him?”
“I did.” Jungkook shrugs as he takes his bottle of beer and drinks. “But my attention is on you.”
Jungkook really really needs to stop turning him into a pink cloud of flustered smoke due to his forward responses. But also, Taehyung kinda maybe doesn’t want him to stop at the same time.
“I’m just amazed by him, that’s all.” he tells him.
Starting to feel the alcohol he inhaled earlier begin to cloud his thoughts due to how fast he drank it. “This isn’t really the type of thing I see everyday or even on rare days.”
“And that’s fine,” Jungkook replies. “I’m not judging you or anything.
It’s actually a bit endearing. I’m just not interested in looking at anyone else. That’s all.”
He wishes his glass would magically refill somehow, because Jungkook is on a mission to make him evaporate into nothingness before the end of their date.
“Anyway,” Jungkook says after he downs his drink in one go and wipes his mouth with the back of his hand. “Wanna dance?”
Taehyung looks from him to the crowded dance floor uncertainly, not too comfortable yet with these types of crowds despite the pleasant buzz he’s sporting
due to the alcohol and the club’s seemingly carefree and nonjudgmental vibe going.
He can’t explain it. It sounds silly to worry about something that seems non-existent in this universe. But growing up with eyes always on him, waiting for him to mess up, makes him afraid still.
Of course, Jungkook seems to understand and shoots him a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry, Tae.” he says in a gentle tone, scooting close to him and wrapping a protective arm around his waist. “You’re safe here. You’re safe with me.”
His safe place, he thinks.
Not a place. A congregation. Or a religion. But a person.
The thought alone comforts him in more ways than one, and it’s enough to give him the strength to nod at him albeit hesitantly, causing Jungkook to smile before he stands
and pulls him into the direction of the dancefloor.
They squeeze through the crowd together. Jungkook’s hand not leaving his waist despite the bodies that were bumping against them until they reach the middle and Jungkook turns to face him, a wide grin on his face
and begins to sway along to the music.
Grabbing Taehyung’s hands and playfully making him sway with him, causing Taehyung to laugh and mimic his moves. Going with the flow and convincing himself to stop overthinking. Experimentally copying the way Jungkook is moving his hips
and stepping side to side but still feeling a bit self conscious at the people around him.
As if sensing his reluctance, Jungkook lets go of his hands and begins to pull off the most ridiculous dance moves ever, making Taehyung laugh at him and causing everyone nearby to look
to look at him and cheer him on with happy whistles and screams. One of them even joined Jungkook in twerking in the middle.
It effectively kicks up Taehyung’s confidence a notch and he starts to move less consciously and rolls his hips from side to side while Jungkook does
an impressive breakdance in the middle of the dancefloor.
One of the guys next to him turns to him and dances with him from a respectable distance. It’s more friendly than anything else, encouraging too. And before Taehyung knows it, there’s a group of people dancing
surrounding him. Laughing and playfully swaying along with him until Taehyung finally forgets about his worries and dances with unmeasured steps, going along with the music and not shying away anymore from looks thrown his way since he knows that those looks aren’t judging,
but supportive. Welcoming.
Jungkook is still dancing away close to him. He can feel his intense eyes on him. Ready to come to his defense if anyone oversteps. Securing his safety as promised.
But there’s also fondness there and pride. He looks so genuinely happy to see him enjoy and let loose.
And Taehyung can’t help but wonder where someone can find a person like Jungkook?
Who’s ready to make a fool of himself and steal the crowd’s attention just to make you feel more comfortable? Who’s happy to see you win the smallest of battles as if he won himself? He thinks it’s hard to come across someone like him.
“Your boyfriend is really sweet,” someone whispers to him. Again, non judgemental. Like it’s normal for boys to be in a relationship with boys. It’s so refreshing. It’s so comforting. “You’re lucky.”
And he is. He’s very lucky to have caught the attention of someone like him. He’s lucky that out of everyone he could have discovered this part of himself– it was with the twins.
“Thanks,” he replies mindlessly. Too busy smiling widely while
watching Jungkook approach him with a grin of his own and doing a funny rendition of the robot dance.
“Please don’t make me regret coming with you!” Taehyung laughs as he lightly shoves Jungkook on the shoulder when the latter tries to hold his hands. “You’re the worst!”
“I’m the best dancer here! Admit it!” Jungkook says, turning him around and hugging him around the waist. Making Taehyung blush yet again. Hot puff of smoke and all.
“Never!” he replies under his breath, looking at him from over his shoulder,
still grinning despite the heat in his cheeks.
Jungkook huffs. He can feel his breath hit the side of his neck, making goosebumps erupt from it, before he leans in to whisper at the shell of his ear. Feeling his arms entangle tightly around his waist.
“It’s okay,” he mutters under his breath. “It was worth making a fool of myself to see you happy like this anyway.”
Taehyung is just feeling too much and is experiencing new things at once. He’s overwhelmed in the best way possible, and it’s all thanks to Jungkook.
He always thought that falling in love was a falling in the literal sense. Spiraling down until you wait for it to hit. But to Taehyung it was the opposite. It felt like floating. It feels like you’re light as air and is one with clouds.
No burdens, no weight on his shoulders. No nothing.
It feels like he’s free.
Something he hasn’t gotten the chance to experience.
Until now, that is.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
Taehyung is busy.
Well actually, that’s an understatement.
Taehyung has his hands full. He’s under a mountain of pending things that he has to do that all have nearing deadlines, and even after he checks off an item in his to-do list, two more things add up to it
and he’s stressed to say the very least.
As the christian club’s secretary, and of course as the pastor’s son, Taehyung was tasked to do a couple things for the upcoming talent show that’s in just a few days. From getting the stage set up, ordering consolation prizes for those
who joined the show, selling tickets and promoting it, and so on. Plus he’s also trying to keep up with his classes to make sure he maintains his grades, so that has been quite lovely too. (Not.)
So yes, Taehyung is busier than the devil itself it seems and
the only reason why he hasn’t dropped dead or lost his mind over the course of the last couple of days is because of the twins.
The twins who have always been there to remind him to take a break. Sometimes it’s just one of them, sometimes it’s both,
but they’ve been consistent ever since Taehyung’s hellish week has begun, and he has a suspicion that the two of them have made some sort of agreement to make sure that he’s cared for. Something that always triggers the butterflies in his stomach
and has his smiling silly when he’d see one or both of them during lunch or dinner to make sure he eats, or when he’d see them waiting for him outside his last class or after his club meetings so they could walk him back to the dorms (no matter how late it is) and so on.
And despite his busy schedule, they somehow find the time to go out on dates. Whether it’s a quick trip to the ice cream parlor or a study date. Quick breathers, they called it. Something he didn’t know he needed until the twins.
It’s all so sweet and he appreciates them a lot for it. He thinks that it’s nice to have someone– someones to lean on when things get rough and to take care of him when he forgets how to. A quick breather to help him unwind in the midst of chaos
and to just feel free from his responsibilities.
And the more they go out, the more he falls, or rather, floats in love. Something that scares him in a good and bad way.
Good, because it’s the twins. They haven’t given him a single reason to think that it’s bad or wrong
even when people (Read: the church) would say otherwise. They’re just two people, well three, trying to show their concern for each other and be good to one another.
The twins have just been so good to him and so patient, and sometimes Taehyung wonders what he did to deserve
it when he could hardly show the affection back due to his busy and closeted lifestyle but they don’t ask for anything in return. They just show give and give, and it’s all heart fluttering. It makes him feel really special. And loved.
And bad because, well they’re brothers. Twin brothers. Taehyung, as much as he tries to convince himself to start thinking things through and pick one so as not to lead the other on, feels conflicted. He’s falling– floating for them both equally. They may be different in more
ways than one but the way they make him feel is the same, but at the same time, he really doesn’t want to come in between them when the time comes for him to make a choice.
Again, Taehyung does not believe that love should not be possessive.
He is never the jealous type because he believes love comes with trust and whatever that is meant for you will be yours in the end. That you’re not gonna lose anything or anyone that God made for you. But at the same time, whenever he thinks of choosing,
of letting one of them go, he gets this sick feeling in the pit of his stomach.
He knows it’s selfish to keep hanging on and to let things escalate into something more serious that can cause heartbreaks, but how can he decide when both of them make him so happy?
Plus choosing feels like breaking his heart too. Maybe three since the twins, despite their banters, were close.
It’s all so unfair and it feels like a test from the heavens, or maybe hell, but at this point Taehyung just wants to wait and see how things play out.
Hopefully it ends with no broken hearts or sticky situations, however that will turn out.
For the meantime, he has his busyness to attend to and has his hands full with the upcoming talent show that seems to have become a trending thing throughout campus.
It seems that having a certain set of twins partaking in the show, among their other popular contestants, brought a lot of attention to it, making their tickets sell fast. Something he was grateful for, but still, it gets a bit tiring.
It’s well into the afternoon already
so thankfully it hasn’t been too busy compared to the days before. He’s currently at the university’s auditorium with the rest of the christian club doing some last minute preparations for the talent show that weekend.
His club members were busy setting up the stage and putting up decorations around while Taehyung was seated behind a table by the door, manning the ticket selling booth for the show while also completing an essay that’s due that evening for one of his classes.
were mostly empty, save for one or two students running to go to their next class, except for Taehyung and the sound of him typing onto his laptop and flicking through the textbook he has next to him until a shadow suddenly appears over Taehyung’s table, making him look up.
He plasters a smile on his face, ready to attend to whoever it is and finds Seolhyun and Somi standing in front of him. Somi has her arms crossed, looking tired and hair pulled up into a bun while Seolhyun is smiling down at Taehyung, pink strands of her bob braided
and holding up a flier for the talent show in her hands.
“Oh hey guys!” Taehyung greets politely, setting his laptop to the side and nodding at the both of them. “It’s nice to see you again. It’s been awhile.”
“Hey Taehyung-ssi!” Seolhyun replies with a grin.
“It’s nice to see you too. How are you?”
Taehyung shrugs. “I’ve been a little busy but I’m good,” he says. “How about you?”
“I’m great, thanks! And yeah, I could see that you are.” Seolhyun gestures to his laptop and book on the table.
“Guess that explains why Jimin has been in a pouty mood.”
Taehyung chuckles. Though, he feels a little guilty for not hanging out with Jimin as often as before except on Sundays when they have to go to church due to both their busy schedules. (And two lovers)
“Yeah, I guess,” he replies lightly. “Though, I should be done with most of my workload after the talent show so hopefully I can see more of you and the others.”
“That’s good.” Seolhyun nods, gripping the flier in her hands and shooting Taehyung a hesitant look that has the
latter feeling a little curious. “So, I actually came here to ask you something, Tae. Hope we’re not bothering you or anything.”
“No, not really,” Taehyung replies, smiling at Somi who has just been watching them converse with arms crossed. “What did you want to talk about?”
“Well…” Seolhyun trails off, tucking her braid behind her ear.
“Seolhyun wanted to ask if there’s still a spot left to join the competition,” Somi suffices for her, wrapping an arm around her shoulders. “And we heard you’re, like, one of the coordinators or something?”
“Uh yeah.” Taehyung gulps. Feeling uneasy. “I am.”
“Yeah and,” Seolhyun says slowly. “I only heard about the contest from Guk and Kook when I saw them practicing at theirs yesterday and they mentioned there was a cash prize?”
“Yup, there is,” Taehyung replies, lips slightly pursing cause he knows where this is going and he really hates disappointing anyone.
Seolhyun nods at him, pursing her lips. “Uh, don’t take this the wrong way, Tae. I’m not trying to emotionally blackmail you or anything,
I’m just trying to explain,” she says slowly, scratching the side of her neck. “You see, my Appa was laid off from work a month ago, so I’ve been trying to pay for my own stuff since, which kind of explains why I didn’t hear about the contest till recently since I go to my part
time jobs after classes, so I was wondering if there’s a slim chance that I can still join?
Taehyung licks his lips, nodding at her in understanding. “Oh, I see,” he says slowly, pushing his hair over his forehead and shifting in his seat uncomfortably.
Again, he really hates disappointing anyone and hearing Seolhyun’s reasons for wanting to join makes him empathize with her.
“Uh actually, Seol, all our slots were full since last week,” he tells her apologetically. “We’re running on a time limit so I don’t, uhm, think–”
“Oh, don’t feel pressured, Tae!” Seolhyun says, waving her hands at him. “I understand if it’s not possible. I was just shooting my shot, and well, I guess I missed so that’s alright.”
Her tone is understanding and sweet, however there’s a tinge of disappointment there
that Taehyung didn’t fail to miss, making him feel a bit sorry for her.
“I’m sorry, Seol,” he says with a sad smile. “I wish I could do something about it. Really. I’m sorry to hear about your situation too.”
“No worries, Tae.” Seolhyun sighs, still smiling.
“But thank you for hearing me out, at least.”
“If someone drops out at the last minute, I’ll call you immediately, or I’ll let Jimin know or something since I don’t have your number,” Taehyung says comfortingly, still feeling sad about disappointing her.
Seolhyun giggles. “Is this your way of asking me for my phone number, Taehyung-ah?” she teases, pulling her phone out and fluttering her eyes at him playfully. “Geez, Tae. All you had to do was ask!”
Taehyung blushes, a grimace appearing on his lips, making Somi snort at him amusedly. “You don’t have to hide your excitement, Tae.” Somi laughs, shaking her head at him.
“Nah, it’s cool.” Seolhyun grins, handing Taehyung her phone.
“I heard you got a date with some church girl from Jimin so I get it. You deserve someone as pure as you”
Taehyung’s eyes widened.
“O-oh?” he says nervously, grabbing her phone and entering his number as he bites his bottom lip. “Uh, when did he tell you guys?”
“Last saturday,” Somi says as she fixes her hair bun. “We were at the frat house and he mentioned it when we were drinking.”
“Oh.” Taehyung slumps, handing Seolhyun her phone back as he thinks back on what he did the past weekend.
He remembers going out with Jungkook that night. They went to the arcade after eating at a fast food restaurant until it was late into the night. As far as he recalls, Jeongguk couldn’t come with them because he was finishing an assignment.
Still, there’s a chance that Jeongguk was there with them. And if Jeongguk knows, it’s likely that Jungkook knows too, and the last thing that Taehyung wanted to do was be dishonest with them since they’ve been so kind and thoughtful to him the past couple of days.
But then again, he saw both the twins the days before and none of them mentioned it, so it’s possible that they don’t either. Still, it makes his tummy churn and it reminds him to be honest with them about what’s happening to avoid any misunderstandings.
“Anyway,” Somi says,
hooking her arm around Seolhyun. “Thanks for the time, Tae.”
“Yeah,” Seolhyun says, nodding at him. The both of them completely oblivious to his inner turmoil. “Thanks Tae, see you around!”
“See you,” he mumbles with a weak smile, waving at them as they head out.
Once they’re out of sight, Taehyung sighs and slumps down on the table. Feeling his temples throb due to the reminder of his complicated situation. He’s thought of telling the twins about Suji a handful of times in the past and even attempted to do it while they’re out together,
but every time he tries, a web of doubts suddenly fills his chest and he always chickens out at the last second and tells himself that he’ll do it some other time instead.
But it seems time was an impatient thing and it has caught up with him. “God,” he mumbles.
“You shouldn’t use the lord’s name in vain, Taehyung-ah.” a teasing voice says, making Taehyung sit up and look at the source of it. Jungkook is there with a handsome grin, holding up two cups in his hands, wearing some loose shorts and a shirt with the sleeves cut out
and with his biceps in full view “That’s a sin.”
You’re a sin, he wants to say but only sighs and perches his chin on his palm. “I’ll go to confession on Sunday.” he replies dryly, making Jungkook snort and take the seat next to him. Passing him one of the cups.
“You can confess to me if you want,” Jungkook grins, turning to look at him. “I liked being called the alternative version of father too, you know.”
Taehyung blushes as he smacks the elder’s bicep with the sound of the resonating slap echoing throughout the hallways,
with Jungkook’s laughter mixing with it. “Behave!” Taehyung scolds, pointing a finger at him.
Jungkook smirks. “What?” he says. “It’s true. I like being called da–”
“Kookie!” Taehyung whines, scrunching his eyebrows at him.
The other sighs at him. “Fine, fine, I’ll stop but quit calling me that.” he grimaces. “You make it sound like I’m a puppy.”
Taehyung giggles. “But you kinda are one.” he smiles, reaching to card some fingers over his bangs to push it out of his face.
“Your bangs are getting long. Aren’t you gonna get that trimmed?”
Jungkook shrugs. “I’m thinking of growing it out like Gguk’s,” he says, leaning back on his chair. “But with an undercut. What do you think?”
He doesn’t need to be even more attractive, he thinks
. But at the same time, he isn’t appalled by the idea. “I’m sure it’ll look good,” he replies. “That way I can braid it too during your football practice.”
Jungkook frowns. “No thanks. I’m fine with the sprout hairdo,” he says.
“Suit yourself. You look way more puppier that way anyway,” Taehyung teases.
The other snorts. “Anyway, enough about puppies,” he says. “Why you suddenly calling God?”
“Nothing,” Taehyung answers automatically. Starting to remember that conversation earlier with Seol and Somi.
Jungkook raises an eyebrow. “Don’t lie,” he says. “It didn’t look like nothing to me, so spill.”
Taehyung licks his lips, looking everywhere except Jungkook as he tries to summon some courage to try and tell him about that date he has to go on with Suji.
But he comes up with nothing, and bites his lips, going for something else instead.
“It’s just–” he gulps. “Well, uh, Seol and Somi were here a few minutes ago.”
“Oh?” Jungkook asks, looking at him. “What did they want?”
Taehyung fidgets in his seat. “Uh, Seol was asking if she could join the talent show,” he says. “She says she got the memo late and was hoping she could do a last minute sign up to try and win the prize money, but...”
Jungkook nods at him understandingly.
“Oh right, I heard about her money struggles lately,” he says empathetically. “I’m guessing you’re feeling guilty cause you had to say no?”
Taehyung sighs. “Yeah,” he replies. “I wish there was a way for me to help her out or something.”
Jungkook reaches to squeeze his shoulder in comfort, smiling at him. “Don’t feel guilty,” he tells him. “Look. It isn’t your fault. I’m pretty sure Seol knows that too so stop putting unnecessary baggage on your shoulders, Tae. Your plate is full as it is.”
“I know.” Taehyung smiles sadly. “But I wish I could help her. That’s all.”
Jungkook smiles back at him. “I know you do, Angel.” he tells him gently, rubbing his back affectionately. “It’s why I’m starting to f–” he shakes his head, cheeks turning a tinge of pink
as he licks his lips.
Taehyung is glad that Jungkook isn’t looking because he’s pretty sure he has a stupid smile on his face at the thought of what he was about to say, about what he was about to confess. But at the same time, he’s glad he retracted his statement
because he might confess back and he doesn’t want to just yet, since he also feels the same way for Jungkook’s brother.
“Uh anyway.” Jungkook clears his throat, sitting up straight. “I think I might have a solution for you.”
Taehyung raises an eyebrow. “Oh? And what is it?”
“I’ll give Seol my slot.” Jungkook says, not at all disappointed or perturbed, making Taehyung’s eyes widen.
“What? Don’t be silly, Kook,” he says. “You’re the first person who signed up even before everyone else did and I heard you’ve been practicing since then.
I won’t let you drop out.”
“It’s fine.” Jungkook shrugs. “I mean, Seol needs it more than me anyway so it’s no big deal.”
“And I’m trying it this whole being selfless thing,” Jungkook interrupts, shooting Taehyung a smile.
“I’ve been around good company lately and I gotta admit, they’re rubbing off on me a little.”
Butterflies. Butterflies. And more butterflies.
Taehyung honestly has the urge to kiss him or something due to how thoughtful he’s being.
It may seem like it’s nothing to some but over the last couple of weeks he’s been with the twins, Taehyung has come to know how competitive they are– especially with each other. They’re not the type to easily back out of a challenge,
plus the two of them have been talking shit with each other about the show for days.
So Jungkook easily letting his spot go for someone else who needs it more is a huge gesture. And to do it so willingly and easily? It was nice to know he was able to be a good influence to them.
“Thank you, Kookie.” Taehyung smiles at him appreciatively. “I’m sure Seol would appreciate it.”
“No problem,” Jungkook grins at him handsomely. Not annoyed by the nickname. “Anything for you, Angel.”
Taehyung bites his lips. Again, he could never get used to how the twins make him feel. How tiny gestures and sweet call names could create big thumps inside his chest.
“And besides,” Jungkook continues, a smirk appearing at the corner of his lips.
“I could perform for you privately, you know. I’m not opposed to a one on one show.”
Another loud echoing slap resonates along the hallways.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
Days pass and soon it’s the talent show already.
A buzz of excitement fills the school’s auditorium as students and guests fall in line to enter through the doors where an arch made of balloons was displayed. Showing their tickets at the entrance where Taehyung is
since he’s the person tasked to handle crowd management.
There’s still thirty minutes before showtime and Taehyung hopes he can finish soon so he can come backstage to wish Jimin and Jeongguk good luck and maybe find Jungkook at the audience so they could watch the show together
but with the number of people still in line, he thinks that’s highly unlikely, plus he hasn’t seen a whiff of Jungkook yet too.
According to the guys at the frat, who were already inside with banners in their hands, Jungkook and Jeongguk came together.
Contestants were granted access three hours before showtime to do some rehearsals to make sure things run smoothly, and as per Hoseok, the twins liked to be with each other to hype the other up when something big like this happens. Something that Taehyung found endearing and cute
to think about since it appears that they weren’t just each other’s arch nemesis, but their personal cheerleaders as well.
He was just thinking of texting them to wish Jeongguk luck and to ask Jungkook where he is when someone taps him on the shoulder, making him look to find
his parents– and Suji with them. Suddenly the fondness is replaced by discomfort as Taehyung excuses himself from the person he was about to assist with their ticket, and asks one of his club mates to fill in for him before he walks over to them with slow steps.
“Appa, Eomma,” he bows before turning to Suji. “Hey Suji.”
“Hey Tae,” Suji greets him with a smile. “It’s nice to see you again.”
“Same here.” he replies, hoping his smile doesn’t look like a grimace. “Uh, what are you three doing here?”
“Why else, dear?” his mother chuckles. “We’re here to support the show.”
“And we were hoping to get dinner with you too afterwards,” his father adds. “Hope you didn’t have plans.”
He does. The boys were going to hold a victory/try again next time party for the twins and Jimin,
plus he was hoping he could finally tell the twins about Suji since they all weren’t as busy now, but oh well.
“No, I should be free after this, Appa,” he replies. “You might have to wait a bit though since we still have to clean up after this.”
“That’s fine,” his mother nods. “Anyway, we should let you go back to work. Your club advisor gave us special seats since we’re sponsors.”
“Should we save you a seat?” Suji asks, sounding hopeful.
Taehyung honestly wishes he could learn how to say no, but alas.
“Sure.” he mumbles.
“Great!” Suji beams, grinning at him happily. “See you later then, Tae.”
“See you inside, son.” his father says before the three of them head inside using a different entrance and leaving Taehyung to go back to his post by the door with heavy steps.
So much for his plans, he thought with a defeated sigh.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
Ten minutes before showtime, Taehyung finds himself seated at the front of the audience next to Suji. Sitting silently as he waits for the show to start with legs crossed as he looks at the stage.
The stage is currently dimly lit with only the projectors behind it lighting up showing a backdrop of lists of charities that the all proceeds of the show will go to as well as information as to how to support it, next to some clips and pictures showing the church’s last donation
drive. There’s also some beams lighting up the stage and the sound of soft music, along with the excited chatter from the audience.
He tried to subtly look for a head of dark hair through the crowd in search of Jungkook but since the auditorium was filled to the brim,
some even standing on the sides, he wasn’t successful. He reminds himself to send the twins a text to apologize for not being to go to the party later.
“So do you know anyone who’s participating?” Suji asks conversationally next to him. Looking at him with a smile.
“Yeah, some friends are joining in.” he replies. “Jimin’s joining too.”
“Oh really?” Suji’s eyes light up. “Is he going to dance?”
“Yep,” Taehyung replies. Suji looks at him intently, seemingly wanting more. He realizes then that he’s kind of being a bit dismissive so he licks
his lips and shrugs. Adding a casual, “I think he’s doing some sort of contemporary dance or something traditional. I tried to ask him for more details but he was secretive about it.”
Suji chuckles at him. “Well, Jimin was always the type to go all out in his performances so
I wouldn’t expect any less from him,” she says politely, making Taehyung hum. “And you mentioned there are some other friends too?”
“Yeah.” Taehyung bites his lips. “Some guys Jimin was friends with that eventually became my friends too.”
“Oh cool,” Suji says. “Who are they?”
But before Taehyung could respond, the sound of someone tapping their microphone echoed across the auditorium and the host, the christian club’s advisor– Yoona, entered the stage with a wide smile on her face. Microphone at hand making everyone cheer loudly.
“Good evening, everyone!” Yoona greets energetically as the volume of the music increases and as the stage lights up with a golden glow, and the backdrop on the led displays changing into a video of her face. “How’s everyone doing?”
The crowd cheers at her in response politely, clapping their hands and screaming the names of their friends who joined. Taehyung could make out Jeongguk’s name throughout it, making him smile and thrum with excitement as he listens to
Yoona thank everyone for coming and supporting the show before she begins to introduce the three judges.
The judges were, surprise surprise, members of the church. The first judge was Im Eunha, a retired ballet dancer and one of the heads in the church’s fundraisers.
She has a kind looking smile on her face as she stands and waves at the crowd, but Taehyung also knows how she’s a strict disciplinarian. There have been a few instances when she has scolded him and Jimin when they came to one of their drives late and told their parents about it,
earning them another set of sermons.
The second judge is a newscaster and Hoseok’s father, Jung Heechul. Unlike Im Eunha, Hoseok’s father is pretty laid back and was described as a pretty cool guy by Hoseok.
The Jungs weren’t as active in church activities compared to Taehyung and Jimin’s family but when it came to fun stuff like this, they could be counted on.
And lastly, the final judge is Somi’s stepdad, Lee Junghyun, who is the church’s biggest sponsor and who donated the prize
money for tonight’s talent show. Unlike his parents, Taehyung isn’t exactly close with Mr. Lee but he’s a seemingly stoic man and he hasn’t heard anything bad about him. All he knew was that he remarried a few years ago, he works as a lawyer and is pretty darn quiet because
Taehyung can count with one hand the number of times he said a full sentence during the few times they had dinner together with his family.
After the judges were introduced, Yoona starts to explain the criteria for judging which is fifty points for talent,
twenty for showmanship or confidence, ten for props and costume, ten for audience’s impact and finally, ten for appropriateness of acts since it was a church conducted event. Taehyung hopes Jeongguk didn’t go through with Lady Gaga cause he’s pretty sure he’s going to get
an instant ten wiped out of his scoresheet.
Taehyung starts to buzz with excitement just like the rest of the crowd as Yoona finishes and asks the crowd if they were ready for the first contender, clapping as hard as he can and whistling along when Yoona announces an excited,
“First up on the stage with his mesmerizing dance moves is Park Jimin!”
He could hear voices that sound so much like Yoongi and Hoseok from behind him yelling Jimin’s name out loud, making Taehyung smile secretly as he watches the stage dim and a shadow enters the middle of it
and waits for the music to start.
The audience, along with Taehyung, waits with bated breaths until the sound of soft piano music fills the auditorium and white light shines on the stage to reveal Jimin in the middle of it, wearing a white suit with a long cloth dangling from
the front. Eyes intense as he walks along the music and begins his routine.
Taehyung’s hands are red from clapping as Jimin finishes his routine, standing up and whistling as his friends run up to center stage. Bright grin plastered on his face as he bows at the audience and at the judges before he heads backstage.
This isn’t the first time he has seen Jimin dance but it always feels like it is. Jimin always manages to bring something fresh, something bewitching whenever he comes on stage and it never fails to steal Taehyung’s breath away.
This performance particularly was so clean and expertly executed. It seems that formally studying dance in University is paying off.
Something that makes Taehyung a bit envious but he pushes that thought to the back of his mind. Choosing to be happy for his friend instead.
“Wasn’t that beautiful, everyone!” Yoona says, looking at the crowd with awe in her eyes as she returns to the stage. “Everyone, please give another round of applause for Park Jimin!”
The crowd replies with loud cheers and applause, Yoongi and Hoseok the loudest.
Taehyung tries to compete but it’s two against one so he lets Jimin’s lovers have this one. For now, he thought with a smile.
“Okay, so our next performance features a self composed declamation piece from one of our acting majors,” Yoona says into her microphone next excitedly.
“Everyone please give a round of applause to Jang Seolhyun!”
Taehyung claps along with the crowd, praying for her success quietly as he watches the stage dim once again after Yoona climbs off of it, followed by Seolhyun walking up to the middle of it wearing a long flowy dress
with a flower crown perched on her head, a mic attached to her face to allow her to use both hands. It’s quiet save for the sound of quiet mutters as they all waited for Seolhyun to begin.
Suddenly the sound of something booming echoes throughout the room,
followed by Seolhyun saying, “I am about to make a world.” in a deep serious tone. No trace of her usually bubbly persona could be found as darkness surrounds her. “That’s what God said when he stepped into space and saw the darkness of hundred midnights converging into one.”
“Let there be light.” Seolhyun says, and as soon as the words escape her lips, light floods the stage. Revealing her in the middle with her pink highlights and bob styled neatly and hands outstretched, acting like she summoned light into her stage.
Taehyung is completely enamored by Seolhyun’s performance; at the way she delivers her lines and acts out these small yet impactful gestures with her hands and body, with the sound effects and lights making everything better. Like they’re watching creation itself.
Once Seolhyun is done delivering her declaration and is bowing at the audience with a smile on her face, everyone is standing up and is giving her a respectable round of applause.
The talent show continues from there. After Seolhyun completes her performance, Jungkook’s friend,
Yugyeom and his band comes on stage and sings a rock version of some eighties song. After that was some guy that Taehyung hadn't met before who did a magic trick where he approaches the judges and makes them pick a card for him to guess, and so on.
Taehyung finds himself at the edge of his seat as he waits for Jeongguk’s performance which was the last one, anticipation building up more and more since he heard from Jimin that Jeongguk’s performance was one of the best. The rest of the performances were great already so
he could only imagine what Jeongguk’s performance was. All he knows is that he’s dancing and that he has been practicing hard.
The second to the last performance finally ends with a polite round of applause as they exit out of stage, making Taehyung sit up straight and bite his
lips in excitement as Yoona returns to the stage with her microphone and complimenting the last performance as usual.
“Alright so we’re down to our last performance, everyone,” Yoona says into her microphone with a knowing smile on her face.
The audience erupts with loud roaring screams and applause even before Yoona can finish her sentence, since everyone knew that it was Jeongguk. (Taehyung included but he tried to be subtle about it since he’s sitting next to his supposed date and his parents)
“Woah, it looks like everyone is excited!” Yoona laughs into her microphone. “Okay okay, I won’t take long. Geez, do I even have to introduce our next performance? Looks like you know who it is already! Anyway, give it up for our last performance– the Jeon twins!”
The Jeon what?
Taehyung pauses mid clap as he stares at the stage that’s beginning to dim as he registers what Yoona said. He barely hears Suji ask him if he’s alright beside him since he’s reeling at the fact that the twins decided to work together for once.
Not that it wasn’t unheard of since they were co captains of the football team but it was a rare occurrence outside the field indeed.
He couldn’t decide which was louder. The cheers inside the room or the sound of his booming heart. He thinks it’s the latter,
as he sees twin shadows walk towards the center stage and stands side by side as they wait for the cue to start.
And soon the sound of low tempo music starts to echo throughout the auditorium the same time the stage lights up in red light,
revealing Jeongguk who’s wearing a red acid washed long coat and matching pants with a leopard printed shirt underneath with a few buttons undone and Jungkook in full black leather with metal studs.
Both with predatory looks on their faces as they walk to the front of the stage together, stealing Taehyung’s breath.
The crowd doesn’t stop cheering as Jeongguk and Jungkook make it at the edge of stage, neither does Taehyung’s heart palpitations as they both start to dance some intricate routine in sync.
and as Jungkook kicks off their performance with his angelic singing voice, hitting the first note flawlessly and Jeongguk singing next with the same expertise, making Taehyung wonder if there was anything that the these twins couldn't do.
The performance is nothing but erotic to say the least. With Jeongguk and Jungkook singing and dancing, rubbing their meaty thighs and drool worthy body rolls. Taehyung is trying his very best not to look like he’s in need of air
and is praying that his parents and Suji wasn’t looking his way.
But luck wasn’t on his side.
“You okay, Tae?” Suji asks, scrunching her eyebrows at him as she puts a hand over his arm. “You look pale.”
“I’m good,” Taehyung mumbles with a tight lipped smile, closing his thighs together to hide the growing arousal underneath his slacks.
Suji gives him a quizzical look, but thankfully, she doesn’t ask any more questions and proceeds to return her attention back to the stage
where the twins were dragging a hand over their thighs before pulling their shirt open to reveal more of their chest.
Taehyung gulps. Despite their performance only running for not more than two minutes, it felt like time was frozen. Like the universe was purposely making time run at a turtle’s pace to make Taehyung’s suffering (and pleasure) last longer.
It was honestly like living in two worlds. Like he was watching temptation tease him right before his very eyes and he couldn’t even do anything about it since his guardians were nearby.
Soon the twins end their performance
with some final dance moves and finalizing it as they knelt on the stage, facing each other. Both catching their breaths and sweat dripping down from their bodies, making the crowd go wild like a pack of escaped zoo animals. (Not that Taehyung can blame them.)
The twins stand in unison once the stage lights up, turning to look at the crowd and bowing at them with happy smiles on their faces.
Taehyung catches their eyes after their bow, and he swears– Taehyung swears on the cross that he’s going to smack them senseless after the show
cause they both winked in his direction, making him blush furiously and Suji to look at him with an eyebrow raised.
“Do you know them?” she asks curiously, head tilted to the side. “Are they the friends you’re talking about?”
“Uh yeah,” Taehyung mutters. Thankfully his voice didn’t crack. “They’re my friends.”
Suji hums at him in understanding. Though there’s a shadow of curiosity falling over her face as she turns to look at the stage where the twins were already heading backstage.
Taehyung sighs deeply. Checking the time to see if he can go backstage and talk to the twins since he won’t get as much time later on due to his tasks as the member of the club and since he’s having dinner with his parents– and Suji later.
He tells Suji that he’s going backstage to go check if the prizes and awards were ready, making her nod at him before he saunters off into the direction of the twins.
Backstage was filled with a flurry of people by the time Taehyung arrived with contestants talking amongst themselves, congratulating each other for a job well done and the christian club’s stage crew flying by to get things done,
while the church’s choir does an intermission number for the audience while the judges tallies the score and decides the winner.
He finds the twins sitting together, breathless and sweaty, with Seolhyun and Jimin who were giving them a congratulatory pat on the back
and with the twins smiling at them widely as they drank some water.
Taehyung tries to stifle a smile as he makes a beeline towards them, nodding at the few faces he recognizes and complimenting their performance as he makes his way to the group.
Once he was near, he catches Jeongguk’s eyes first and finds a smirk appearing instantly on his face and stands up to approach him with Jungkook following him behind with an equally menacing look on his face.
He tries to school his face to look unimpressed as he marches towards them, and waving over their shoulder when he sees Jimin and Seolhyun looking in his direction and lighting up when they see him.
“Oh! Hey Tae!” Seolhyun greets with a smile, waving at him from her perch at the bench while Jimin stands and runs over to him, bypassing the twins in a blink of an eye and hauling him over him to give him a tight hug.
“Taetae!” Jimin says happily. “Why didn’t you come before the performances started? I was waiting for you!”
He could practically hear the pout in Jimin’s voice and it makes him chuckle as he hugs him back.
“Sorry Mimi,” he replies, looking up to find the twins standing nearby and looking at them with a grin on their faces. “I had to let everyone in before the show started and something came up.”
“Oh?” Jimin lets him go and raises a curious eyebrow up. “What came up?”
“Uh,” Taehyung hesitates, suddenly remembering Suji’s presence and about how Jimin told people at the frat that he is allegedly dating her. And with the twins closeby and within earshot, he doesn’t really want them to discover his secret this way.
“I had to entertain some important guests. Pastor’s son and all. You know how it is.”
Jimin sighs. Though, he nods at him understandingly. “Fine, you’re forgiven,” he replies, making Taehyung sigh in relief. “But did you at least watch my performance though?”
Taehyung scoffs at him. “Do you really think I’d miss it?” he asks incredulously before looking at the other three watching them. “Do you think I missed all of your performances?”
Jimin laughs at him and pinches his cheek. “I was just checking,” he says lightly
as Taehyung slaps his hand away from his cheek. “I wouldn’t expect anything less.”
“Did you like our performances, Tae?” Seolhyun asks as he and Jimin turn to face her and the twin, forming a small circle so they could all chat.
“I’m no church kid but I thought the judges would eat up that skit about the creation and stuff.”
“You definitely knew what you were doing out there, Seol.” Taehyung chuckles. “Im Eunha had this mesmerized look on her face while she was watching and that self composed piece you
wrote was beautiful! I think the odds of you winning are looking pretty good!”
Seolhyun blushes at the praise but continues to smile at him. “Thank you, Tae. I hope so,” she says before turning to look at the twins. “And if I do, I think I’ll owe you and the twins one.”
“No need.” Taehyung smiles. “You’re all paid up. That was a great performance.”
“What about me!” Jimin whines, crossing his arms at him and making Taehyung snort at him fondly. “I worked my ass off to practice those flips for weeks! Am I not gonna get any praise?”
“Do I have to?” Taehyung teases with a smile. “You already know how good you are.”
“It won’t hurt to hear it from my best friend, you know?” Jimin grumbles, making Taehyung laugh at him.
“I’m pretty sure you’ll get double the praise from Yoon and Hobi hyung, though, Jimin,” Jeongguk tells him, tone suggestive. “In fact, I think they’ll praise you in more ways than one.”
Taehyung clears his throat as he looks down at his feet while the rest laugh at Jimin who’s
punching Jeongguk on the shoulder playfully. “Perv!” he says. “At least I’ll be getting some!”
“Who says the twins won’t be getting some too?” Seolhyun says, looking at the twins with a smirk on her face.
“I mean, you saw their performance! I was actually waiting for them to grab their dick through their pants or something.”
Taehyung is grateful that they didn’t actually, otherwise he might have to do some explaining to Suji and it’s not something that he’s looking forward to.
“That would take away points from the appropriateness of acts category.” Taehyung says amicably.
Jimin snorts. “Please,” he says. “As if they did all that to win. If I didn’t know any better, it looks like they were just putting on a show for somebody.”
“Well you’re not wrong.” Jungkook smirks, subtly looking in Taehyung’s direction and making the latter click his tongue at him. “You know I like to flaunt.”
“And that wouldn’t be possible if it weren't for me,” Jeongguk points out, shoving him.
“You missed a step earlier by the way.”
“And you didn’t hit one of the high notes right.” Jungkook bickers back.
“But you two did good nonetheless,” Taehyung placates before they could even continue. “I didn’t even see any mistakes so stop bickering already.”
“Yeah! You were both so in sync!” Seolhyun says. “I can’t believe you managed to pull that off in just a few days time!”
“I’m more surprised at the fact that they both willingly decided to work together.” Jimin scoffs as he crosses his arms and raises an eyebrow at them.
Jeongguk’s lips twist into a smile. “A lot has changed,” he answers, briefly looking at Taehyung. “Character development and all.”
Jimin snorts. “Well, I’d like to see more of that.” he mutters.
Jungkook shrugs. “Who knows?” he replies. “Maybe you will.”
Taehyung catches his eyes and finds him looking at him with a smile on his face, and he couldn’t help but to smile back. Although it’s something simple and not that far-fetched, it’s nice to hear that the twins could set their differences aside to work together.
– whether they did it for him or someone else, it doesn’t matter. What matters is that they can work as a team.
“I think you two work better together than against each other,” Taehyung tells them gently, making both boys smile at him.
“Though, I still think the thigh rubbing and the stripping was a bit too much.”
Jimin and Seolhyun laugh as they agree with him while the twins snort at him in sync, though there’s still that smug look on their faces as if they didn’t regret doing the things that they did.
(Not that Taehyung has any regrets too since their performance could beat the heat in the underworld.)
In the midst of their conversation, the sound of applause is heard from beyond the curtains, indicating that the intermission number is finished
and that the announcement of winners is about to commence, making Seolhyun jump up from her seat excited and grab Jimin by the wrist so they could go to the led displays on the other side of the room that’s showing a live video of the show outside.
“They’re about to announce winners! Let’s go guys!” she says happily, already dragging Jimin towards the swarm of other contestants that were also crowding the LED displays where Yoona is saying a few couple closing remarks before she passes the microphone to
one of the judges to announce the winners.
“I think I should go back to my seat in the–” Taehyung was telling their retreating backs, before he felt someone grab his arm and drag him away to a more secluded area behind some curtains that looks like a makeshift dressing room.
“What the?” Taehyung complains, looking up to find Jeongguk and Jungkook there with him with twin devilish smiles on their faces.
He’s suddenly reminded of the reason why he went backstage in the first place and wastes no time in reaching to pinch them both on their arms
using all his strength, making the twins wince in pain and for Taehyung to smirk in victory.
“What was that for?” Jeongguk pouts, rubbing his arm and looking at Taehyung with eyebrows pulled together.
“Is that your way of congratulating us? I don’t have a pain kink, baby.”
Taehyung blushes and huffs at him. “That,” he says, pointing a finger at them. “Was for being obvious on stage with that wink of yours!”
“It was just a wink,” Jungkook whines, taking his leather jacket off to check the red mark on his arm. “Not like we blew a kiss in your direction.”
Taehyung is very glad that they didn’t, thanks. “But still,” he sighs, rubbing his temples.
“You- you know that I’m not, you know… and I don’t really want to raise suspicions or read into it. Not yet at least.”
“Fine, we’re sorry then,” Jungkook sighs at him in understanding. Draping his jacket over his shoulder.
“But I don’t think it’s anything to worry about. I don’t think people knew we were winking at you, just in your direction.”
Suji seemed to think so, he thought to himself but bites his tongue. “I still want to be careful,” he mumbles.
“I- I haven’t told anyone about us yet. Not even Jimin, plus… plus my parents are there too.”
“Your parents are here?” Jeongguk asks, standing up straight. “What are they doing here?”
“Yeah.” Taehyung nods awkwardly.
“They didn’t say that they were coming. I was surprised too. I guess our club advisor invited them since, you know, my dad’s the pastor and all, and the church is mostly in charge of donating the show’s proceeds to the children’s hospital.”
“Damn, okay.” Jungkook says, smile faltering as he takes that information in. “Sorry Tae, we didn’t know.”
“It’s fine,” Taehyung replies, trying to smile at them reassuringly. “You didn’t know too and I guess I’m just overthinking since, well, you know.”
“Yeah.” Jeongguk nods, reaching to massage his nape as a way to comfort him. “We get it.”
They always do, Taehyung thought. He never really has to explain since the twins have a knack of knowing without ever needing to be told.
But at the same time, Taehyung knows that t
here are things, like Suji for example, that needs to be said to avoid any misunderstandings. Something that they’ve been doing quite well as of late, until Taehyung decided to keep that bit of information to himself, so with that thought in mind, he decides to come clean.
But maybe after the show so as not to disrupt the excitement and euphoria that the show has brought them.
“Anyway,” he says, trying to shift the mood into a lighter one. “I’m really proud of you two for working together. You did well.”
The twins smile at him instantly at the praise. “Thanks,” Jungkook replies. “Though, I doubt we’ll win since we violated a couple rules.”
“Yeah.” Jeongguk laughs. “One of the judges grimaced when we showed our abs and touched our crotch area too,
but at least we’re the crowd’s favorite, right?”
They’re certainly one of Taehyung’s favorites, that’s for sure but he only nods at them and tries not to blush at the memory of the twins doing those sinful things on stage.
But again, the twins always manage to know the things that go through his head since, “And you enjoyed it pretty much like our boxing gig,” Jungkook says, smirking at him knowingly.
Taehyung scoffs as he watches the two give each other a high five.
Honestly if it’s not Jungkook versus Jeongguk, it’s him versus the twins.
“Fine,” he tells them, crossing his arms. “I admit, you two did do great and you’re pretty talented so I’ll give you that.”
“We’re actually talented in a lot of ways,” Jeongguk says coyly, wiggling his eyebrows at him knowingly. “We can show you some hidden skills in exchange for more praises if you want.”
Taehyung bites his lips. Trying to will the devil away from convincing him of Jeongguk’s
implications. “I’ll just wait for you to surprise me.” he mumbles. He hopes the next surprise doesn’t equate to a heart attack, though.
“Fine,” Jeongguk laughs. “It’s more fun to see your reaction that way anyway.”
“Yeah, angels are cuter when they’re flustered anyway.” Jungkook adds with a nod, making Taehyung shake his head at them slowly as his cheeks heat.
“Anyway, I think you should go join the others to see who won,” Taehyung says, wanting to put an end to this discussion.
“And I should get back to my seat. My parents should be looking for me.”
“Fine.” Jungkook sighs, following him behind as they step out of the dressing rooms and into the led screens where Lee Junghyun was making his way towards the stage with an envelope that has
the name of the winner in his hands. “See you after the show then?”
Taehyung falters in his steps, remembering his other dilemma. “Oh,” he mumbles. “I, uh, don’t think I can make it to the party later.”
Jungkook raises an eyebrow at him. “Why? Your parents?” he asks.
“Yeah.” Taehyung sighs defeatedly. “I’m having dinner with them later and it might take us awhile. I’ll try to see if I can catch up, though. We don’t usually go out till later and–”
“Hey,” Jeongguk interrupts, reaching to unfold the lines on his forehead and smiling at him in understanding. “Again, no worries. We get it.”
They always do.
“Thanks.” Taehyung smiles as they stop a few feet away from the crowd.
“Anyway, I’ll, uh, see you later or some other time?”
“You definitely will.” Jungkook nods at him easily. “If you need a ride home just text me and I’ll be there.”
“No, text me and I’ll be there.” Jeongguk says, rolling his eyes at his brother.
“I think I’ll take a cab.” Taehyung sighs, shaking his head at them. “But I’ll text you when I get back home. I promise.”
They both sigh at him disappointedly but they nod nonetheless. “Fine.” they echo, making Taehyung smile at them fondly.
“Let me just say bye to Seol and Jimin before I go,” Taehyung says as the three of them join the two who were watching Junghyun announce the third place winner, which was the Jihyo and the cheer squad who were now making their way to the stage to collect their prizes.
“Hey!” Jimin says as soon as he sees the three of them. “Where were you guys? They’re about to announce second place!”
“Just talking.” Jeongguk shrugs. “It’s not like we’re winning anything anyway.”
“I know.” Jimin scoffs.
“But you all should be here when they announce me as the winner.”
“Yeah right,” Jungkook teases, making Jimin shove him playfully on the side and start a mini boxing match.
“What were you and the twins talking about? And why were you talking in the dressing room?” Seolhyun asks, in what seems like an innocent tone, while Jimin and the twins roughhouse on the side, making Taehyung still as he looks at her.
“Oh it’s nothing,” he replies, scratching the side of his neck. “Just congratulated them and talked about some other stuff.”
“Other stuff?” she asks, tilting her head to the side.
“Yeah.” Taehyung licks his lips. “It was a bit private.”
“Oh okay.” Seolhyun shrugs at him nonchalantly, though he can’t help but think that there’s something in her eyes, a hint of curiosity and suspicion that has him biting his lips in discomfort.
Again, Taehyung was never really good at lying and having to lie about more than one thing– his sexuality and (sort of) relationship with the twins from Jimin and the rest, his secret desires to be free from his parents,
then Suji from the twins – feels like he’s standing on slippery ice. One wrong move and everything, including him, will break.
It feels like things are starting to get more delicate right now, more fragile, no matter how strong his feelings for the twins become
and no matter how sure he is that he’s gay, and Taehyung knows that he needs to let someone in to help him carry the weight of everything or turn one of the fragile glasses into rubber so it won’t break.
The second place winner is Jimin, earning the latter a huge round of
applause from the other contestants nearby. He meets Jimin’s eyes and goes to hug him tight in congratulations before he goes to the stage to collect his prize.
He feels the twins stand by his side and watches Jimin from the screen grab a cheque for two hundred thousand won
and bow at the audience with happy smiles on their face. Taehyung hopes he’s wearing a smile too, but he’s still feeling a bit uneasy at the scrutinizing way that Seolhyun is looking at them. It feels like he’s slipping and he really to, at least,
tell the twins about Suji so he could at least save them from breaking.
“Hey,” Taehyung says, looking at the twins hesitantly. “ I, uhm, actually wanted to talk to you two about something.”
He thought he sounded calm, but the words came out a bit breathless and anxious.
Something that didn’t go past the twins.
“What’s up?” Jungkook asks, looking at him and scrunching his eyebrows at him in concern. “You okay?”
Jeongguk also turns to look at him with the same concerned look on his face as Taehyung sucks in a breath and smiles at them, hoping it looks reassuring. “Just, it’s a bit important,” he mumbles, looking around the area and feeling a bit exposed. “I’d rather not tell you here.”
Jungkook nods at him slowly, still looking a bit concerned but Jeongguk has an apprehensive look on his face, like he knows something that his twin doesn’t.
A string of fears and anxiety then starts to form in Taehyung’s chest, adding to the worries he initially had about
Suji’s curiosity, Seolhyun’s suspicion, and now Jeongguk’s awareness of what could be happening. Plus the fact that Jeongguk is hiding something from Jungkook feels like a betrayal of sorts and it makes Taehyung’s skin crawl.
“It’s okay, Tae,” Jeongguk says, subtly squeezing his hand behind Jungkook’s back and making sure to hide it from everyone else’s view. “He’ll understand.”
And that’s the confirmation that Taehyung needs to know.
And as much as it makes him want to roll up into a ball and hide, the hand that Jeongguk has around his own grounds him and gives him the courage to be honest.
“Understand what?” Jungkook asks, looking at the two of them, frowning and looking a bit uncomfortable.
“You’ll know soon.” Jeongguk answers, patting him at the back. “We talked about this, remember?”
Jungkook doesn’t ask any more questions and scrunches his eyebrows, licking his pierced lip as he crosses his arms. Looking a bit perturbed.
Taehyung honestly just wants to tell him now, but he knows it isn’t the time or place so he bites his tongue and hopes Jungkook would trust him.
After all, they’ve all been good at that anyway and he hopes the streak won’t break now that things are getting more serious.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
Dinner with his parents was always a drag, but for some reason, tonight’s dinner was slower than usual because aside from just Suji joining them, the judges at the talent show also joined them.
They’re at a fancy restaurant in Gangnam where people who live in the richer neighborhoods of Seoul frequent. Taehyung’s family amongst the bunch. (In fact, he thinks his mother owns a share in this restaurant they’re eating since they didn’t need
to call in advance to secure a reservation like the rest of the guests inside.)
And although Taehyung is not the type to flaunt his family’s wealth since he was raised to live simply– church kid and all, he can’t say that he isn’t alien to the rich’s lifestyle
and to rich people themselves since he's used to being surrounded by them. Like their generous donors at the church, his father’s business partners and some of his mother’s rich friends that have tea back at their place.
He’s lucky to live in comfort and to be able to get any material thing he wants by just simply asking, something that others did not grow up experiencing so he’s grateful to be blessed like this.
But he supposes that living this way is also one of the reasons why
he’s afraid of defying his parents, or at least, do something that would disappoint them. Plus they’re his main and sole providers.
Taehyung has no other means of getting money except through them, so the fear of knowing how they can take everything away from him
in just a blink of an eye is scary.
Even if that everything is what his parents wanted and not his.
And it also adds to the reason why he’s adamant to not be seen as some sort of disgrace because Taehyung has been around these rich and self righteous people long enough to know
what they would think the moment they find out that the pastor’s son did something that’s less than holy. Sinful.
So Taehyung knows better than to join in on these adults’ conversation, knows how to blend with the decor and only answer when asked in the fear
of saying something wrong and being judged. But even that is proving to be hard since Suji is hellbent in trying to include him every time the elders ask her a question about church.
He knows she’s just trying to make sure he isn’t left out and that her intentions are good,
but he can’t help but be annoyed because no matter how dismissive or scarce his answers are, Suji still milks out more answers from him.
“I heard the youth club is going on a trip soon. Is that right?” Im Eunha, one of the judges, asks conversationally.
“Yes. It’s an overnight retreat at a resort that Mr. Lee owns,” Suji replies, gesturing to Somi’s stepdad, Junghyun. “A little soul searching trip.”
Taehyung wants to snort. He doesn’t need to climb a mountain to search for his’
since it’s inside a closet but he bites his tongue and eats his steak slowly instead.
“Oh that sounds lovely,” Eunha says, smiling at her. “Would you have room for one more? I think a little hiking trip would do one of my nephews good.
He’s been hanging out with bad company these days so I think some good company would do him good.”
“Sure, Miss Im.” Suji smiles at her politely. “There’s always room for more.”
“I’ll let him know then,” Eunha replies.
“Honestly, it’s so hard to monitor teenagers these days! I wish my sister enrolled him in CUK instead. You’re lucky Taehyung isn’t like that.”
Taehyung wants to groan but he gives her a tight-lipped smile at her instead as he cuts his steak.
“I heard from Hoseok you’re taking up pre-med, Taehyung-ah,” Hoseok’s father, Heechul, says. Looking at him and shooting him a smile. “What happened to that art degree?”
Taehyung smiles at him genuinely. Mr. Jung was always one of those people who he doesn’t have to be careful
around since he isn’t that immersed with the catholic lifestyle and is pretty much an open minded guy like how Hoseok is. Before Hoseok went to university, he, Jimin and Hoseok used to always hang out at the Jung’s place and Taehyung even painted them a family portrait once
that had Hoseok’s parents gushing over him which explains the elder’s knowledge to one of his secret desires.
He was just about to reply but before he could his mother beat him to it. “There’s no future in art these days, Heechul-ah,” she says, tone sickeningly sweet.
“Pre-med is more practical, more safe.”
More appropriate, Taehyung thinks as he returns his attention to his steak.
“That may be true but Taehyung-ah’s art is so beautiful,” Heechul says. “He was the one who made that painting of me and my family in our living room!”
“It’s quite lovely, yes. Our Taehyungie is no doubt talented in art,” his mother nods nonchalantly as she sips her wine. “But it’s more of a hobby. Right, dear?”
Taehyung nods at her automatically. A trained smile on his face. “Right.” he mumbles.
“Plus he can help more people when he’s a doctor,” his father adds amicably, busy cutting his steak. “And he’s doing quite well in his studies, so I believe he’s into it.”
“Though he needs to study for one of his classes more,” his mother says, shooting him a seemingly sweet
look that makes him feel sick.
“I’ve been studying for it,” he reasons. “I just had a minor stepback with a test. That’s all.”
“Still, I think you’ll excel in whatever you do, Tae-ah.” Heechul beams his way, making Taehyung smile at him gratefully.
“Yes, I agree.” Eunha replies, nodding. “You’re quite the remarkable young man, dear. Are you seeing anyone right now?”
Anyones more like, he thought with his lips pulled together. Holding his utensils tightly.
“No,” his mother suffices and subtly looking in Suji’s direction, making Taehyung slightly grimace. “I don’t know what’s stopping him honestly.”
“Such a shame.” Eunha shakes her head. “I know a few nice ladies you could take out if you’re interested, dear.”
“That’s okay, ma’am,” Taehyung tells her, hoping he sounds polite. “Thank you for the offer, though.”
“Suit yourself.” Eunha shrugs as she returns her attention to her meal.
“And I’m sure Taehyung has his eyes on somebody and is waiting for a little push,” his mother says
suggestively. “But only time can tell and God only knows.”
Oh, he’s pretty sure God knows all his secrets.
Dinner continues from there, and thankfully, they don’t talk about him anymore and just focus on some church related things.
Suji tries to engage him in some light conversation about the retreat that’s happening in a few days and he tries to converse but the more he sits there and pretends, the more he just wants to escape.
To escape to his safe place, more like.
He didn’t think that the life he was living was this controlled before since he was used to just following and doing what’s expected of him. Not until the twins– his safe place. Honestly, if it weren’t for the thought of the twins, Taehyung would have lost his mind throughout
dinner. He didn’t expect to rely on them this much, even if they weren’t around. He never had someone to weather his inner storms and it’s nice. It’s nice to think of a person, or rather, persons and feel an umbrella over his head.
Soon, dinner concludes and they’re all outside the restaurant getting ready to head back home and are just saying their goodbyes. The three elders who joined them, Eunha, Heechul and Junghyun, leave after telling Taehyung’s father thank you for the meal
and wishing Taehyung good luck with his studies, leaving him, his parents and Suji alone by the car.
“Are you sure you don’t want us to drive you back, son?” his father asks, standing by the open car door and raising an eyebrow at him. “It’s pretty late.”
“I’ll be fine, Appa. Thank you for buying dinner.” he bows to him, already feeling relieved as the night comes to a close.
“Alright.” his father nods. “Take care in going back to the dorms. Text us when you get there. Okay?”
“Okay.” he replies, checking the time on his phone to find that he can still make it to the party at the frat house.
His father waves at him a final time before climbing inside the car to turn the engine on.
His mother kisses him on the cheek and tells him to take care as well, before– “While your father gets the car started, why don’t you talk to Suji about your plans on the hike trip, dear?”
The relief that Taehyung was feeling was instantly drained by that,
replaced by numbing anxiety instead as if he’s once again backed into a corner to do the things people expect him to do. Especially when Suji lights up and looks at him with wide, hopeful eyes. As if she’s expecting more than just going out on that trip with him.
His mother visibly winks at them, adding more fuel to the fire, before she turns to climb inside the car. Leaving the door open, as if she’s making sure that Taehyung is set out to do what he’s expected to do, that makes his nerves thrum in discomfort as he looks at Suji.
“I had a great time tonight, Tae.” Suji smiles at him shyly, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. “Hope we can do it again.”
Taehyung purses his lips. “Uh yeah,” he mumbles uncomfortably, fingers gripping his pants. “I’m glad you did.”
Suji nods at him slowly, biting her lips as she rocks in her steps. Seemingly waiting for something to happen.
Taehyung licks his lips, stomach heavy at what he’s about to do. He really doesn’t want to lead Suji on by asking her out on a date that he doesn’t want to go on.
She’s been nice to him throughout the night and even before then, so he really doesn’t want to play with her feelings. Plus, he’s already tangled enough with the twins as is so adding another person into the mix is too much.
He finds that it’s unfair. He thinks he’s a coward for not being able to stand up for himself and to not say no when his parents ask, but it’s not like he has a choice. It’s not like he’s really free despite how unchained he’s been feeling lately.
Taehyung wishes, Taehyung prays that there was a way for him to get out. To breathe again and forget about all this again but with Suji in front of him and with his parents nearby, he knows he can only choke out all the water they’re making him breathe.
“Uh so there’s this, uh, place we go if you want after the, uh, retreat” he says, making things up as he goes to appease his mother. “It’s- it’s not a lot but if you’re interested…”
“Sure!” Suji says brightly before he could even finish his sentence. Smiling at him widely and eyes lighting up. “I’d love to do whatever it is.”
Taehyung shoots her a tight lipped smile. “Great,” he says, tone a little dry and lacking that excitement.
“I’ll, uh, text you or something.”
“Okay, I’ll wait. No pressure!” Suji nods at him eagerly.
He honestly has the urge to snort at the irony of it since he was initially pressured to ask her out in the first place, but nods instead.
“Alright,” he replies. “I’ll text you. See you at the retreat.”
“See you, Taehyung-ah,” Suji replies softly, obviously trying to stifle her giddiness and it just makes Taehyung feel more guilty than ever. “Take care when going home. Okay?”
“I will.” Taehyung says, waving at her and itching to start walking away so he could be left alone.
At that point, he doesn’t feel like going to the party anymore. Sure, it’s tempting to come home to his safe place so he could feel some sort of ease again
but it feels so wrong to see the twins after this stunt his mother made him pull and pretend that all is well. That they’re all okay when things aren’t.
And as if he wasn’t feeling shitty already, Suji leans in to give him a peck on the cheek, making his eyes widen in surprise
as he looks back at her. Again, feeling out of skin and discomfort clouding his stomach.
“Bye, Tae.” she says with a smile.
“Bye.” he replies in a blank tone, watching as she climbs inside the car where his parents are waiting and swallowing his spit
when he meets his mother’s pleased eyes when she turns to pull the car door shut.
He doesn’t know how long he stays there at the parking lot, but it’s long enough until his parents and Suji drive away till their car is out of sight
and until the lights from the restaurant flicker off, only leaving a dim yellow light from a lamppost nearby.
It feels like he’s kind of disassociating a little. Like he’s unplugging himself from his body to forget about the overwhelming emotions he’s feeling at that moment
because he doesn’t register his legs moving on its own accord, he doesn’t register his hands pulling out a phone and opening a contact’s name and calling it. And it doesn’t feel like it’s his lips when he tells whoever he’s talking to to pick him up
at some convenience store his feet took him to.
The only time he finally snaps out of that daze is when he hears the sound of a motorcycle revving from nearby and finding doe eyes that were showing nothing but concern
as he climbs out of his vehicle and approaches him in quick strides.
“Hey, you okay?” he hears
Taehyung tries to work his tongue to say that he is, but stops himself at the last second because he’s tired of lying. He’s tired of pretending and making sure that everyone is okay.
“No.” Taehyung replies, throat dry as he looks at the elder. “I- no. Not really.”
Jeongguk smiles at him sadly and reaches to gently unknot the lines that were forming on his forehead. “Don’t worry,” he tells him, his touch already doing its magic. “I got you, Tae.”
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
Everything happens in a blur after Jeongguk picks him up at the convenience store. And although he was mostly silent and was still a bit out of it, he managed to register the flash of hazy city lights that zipped past his vision
and the faint sound of the other’s motorcycle’s revs as he and Jeongguk drove away to escape for a bit.
The air is chilly, making him shiver, but the hand that Jeongguk has around his own manages to transfer some warmth and fuzziness to his body
as if he was some sort of human heater, as if Taehyung was kneeling in front of a fireplace’s hearth with his palms facing the flames on a winter day.
That image, plus Jeongguk himself was a comforting thought, and it was enough to soothe his nerves a little
and get his senses back to find that they ended up at the Han River park, the same place the twins took him on the day he also met up with his parents and was deciding if it were a good idea to accept their proposal on a date.
The two of them are silent as they bask in this momentary peace with nothing but the calming waves from the river in front of them, the soft light from the lampposts nearby and the scent of roasted chestnuts that Jeongguk has in his hands accompanying them.
He decides that if were to embody the word comfort, it’d have to take the form of Jeongguk. Jeongguk who has been nothing but patient to him since he came to his aid. Who didn’t ask him any questions or tried to get him to open up, even though he had every right to do so
since Taehyung asked him to come. All he did was drive him away back to this safe place, bought him the chestnuts in his hands (because Taehyung kept biting his lips and he was worried it would bleed), sat next to him wordlessly and watched the scenery in front of them.
It didn’t seem like much but it was everything that Taehyung needed, which is both scary and amazing because he didn’t think that something as simple as this could have this much power over him.
Power that was actually good for once, that is. Because Taehyung has grown up succumbing to the power his parents have held over his head, from this pre-planned destiny they placed on his plate and the expectations that everyone around him expected him to see through.
There’s something so freeing about admitting your vulnerabilities, even a small portion of it, to someone. To admit you’re too soft, too weak to keep walking on when these chains have been hindering him to do so. It’s nice to have someone like Jeongguk (and Jungkook).
Even though he’s beginning to think that he doesn’t deserve them.
“Hey, look at that!” Jeongguk says, disturbing him from his thoughts and making him look up to find the elder pointing at a mother duck and her ducklings following her from behind in a row.
Feathery butts swaying left and right as they swam back home. It makes Taehyung’s lips twitch into a small smile.
“Didn’t think we’d see ducks this late,” Jeongguk comments brightly, looking at Taehyung with a smile. “They’re usually hidden away somewhere by this time.”
“Ducks are actually like owls,” Taehyung says, grateful for the quick icebreaker as his eyes follow the flock of ducks. “They sleep throughout the day and night. Plus, they like to stay awake at night because it’s safer to sleep in the day.”
Jeongguk makes an interested humming sound. “That makes sense,” he comments, nodding his head. “Need to keep your guard up when the predators are hunting.”
The corner of his lips twitch at that. Oddly, Taehyung can relate. “Yeah, I guess you’re right.” he mumbles, licking his lips.
The silence returns once more and is only broken when Jeongguk would crack a chestnut open and offer one to him to which he would accept.
He knows it’s the perfect time to bring up his dilemmas and tell Jeongguk why he was upset. He does owe the truth to him and Jungkook, after all. And he knows the other won’t make a big deal out of it since Taehyung thinks that the other already has an idea as to what it is.
But everytime he tries to open his mouth, it feels like his throat is turned into sandpaper and he can’t get the words to come out. He’s still afraid. He still has a war of thoughts shooting missiles in his mind due to how Jeongguk would react
when he tells him the truth about Suji and about how the relationship that he (as well as Jungkook) wanted to try with him.
Plus he isn’t even sure if he wants the twins to back off because he’s starting to feel a certain, strong way for them as the days roll by,
but at the same time, he doesn’t want to lead them on or possess them in any way especially if the fates are not making him available.
Taehyung is a believer that things happen for a reason. /For a lesson./
But being in this specific scenario right now makes him question the heavens if it were really a lesson or a punishment. If it was its way of retaliating for the sins that he’s done.
But one thing’s for sure, whether it’s for a lesson or something else, Taehyung wants it out of the way and wants to get it over with. See what the stars have written out, and sighs as he faces Jeongguk who was still staring at the spot where the ducks disappeared to,
his long hair billowing through the soft breeze and eyes reflecting the gleam in the river.
“Hey Jeongguk.” he starts, trying to look for the words to say as Jeongguk looks at him carefully. Taehyung opens and closes his mouth but no words come out, just a breath of air.
While Jeongguk, on the other hand, smiles and reaches to touch his cheek and rubs the pad of his thumb gently over it, eyes strained on a spot before he pulls his hand out.
“You had a lipstick stain on your cheek,” he explains, wiping the product on his jeans and making Taehyung purse his lips. “I guess dinner with your parents was fun, then?”
Taehyung looks down on his lap and licks his lips. “It was… a pretty eventful dinner to say the least.” he replies quietly.
“Eventful?” Jeongguk asks.
“Yeah.” Taehyung nods. “We had dinner with the, uhm, judges. Our churchmates.” And Suji, he nearly says.
Jeongguk scoffs at him lightheartedly. “I’m guessing that there was a lot of church talk, then?” he asks conversationally as he leans an arm on the bench’s backrest and faces him. “I’m curious, though. How does one become a member of the church? Do you just attend a service-
-and that’s it?”
“Uh, yes?” Taehyung replies, scratching the side of his neck. “There’s a process, kind of, aside from just attending mass. You have to get baptized, attend every service, and a whole lot of other things but that’s one of the first few steps.”
“Baptized?” Jeongguk asks, tilting his head to the side. “What’s that?”
Taehyung hums. “It’s when the pastor or priest will wash you with holy water,” he explains patiently. “It’s symbolic to being washed from sins and accepting God as your savior.”
“Oh.” Jeongguk nods, still looking a bit confused. “Did you go through all that?”
“Yes.” Taehyung says with a smile. “I was baptized when I was just a month old and have attended service ever since.”
Jeongguk’s eyebrow cock up at that. “A month old?” he asks, bewildered. “Aren’t you too young for that?”
Taehyung snorts. “It’s kind of a custom,” he says. “Usually when your parents are already members, they get their kids baptized at a young age
and are introduced to church life already.”
The other grimaces, and it’s enough to pull out a chuckle from Taehyung. “Don’t look too shocked,” he chides lightly. “Again. It’s like a tradition.”
“Yeah sorry,” Jeongguk mutters, licking his lips.
“I don’t mean to offend you or anything. It just– it just sounds to me like you didn’t have a choice. That’s all.”
Now that he puts it that way, Taehyung realizes that he doesn’t really have a lot of choices actually. Not really.
Not that he has any regrets in serving the church since he’s actually happy to do so, but again, lately it’s becoming more of an obligation and less of a joy.
He didn’t realize that he became silent, and only notices when Jeongguk shifts in his seat and tilts his chin to look
at him. “Hey,” Jeongguk says, sounding a little hesitant. “Sorry. Again, I didn’t mean to cross any lines. Forget about what I said. I was just being stu–”
“No, you’re right,” Taehyung interrupts, putting a hand over his thigh to soothe him and smiling at him gently.
“I- yeah. I didn’t really choose what to believe. In fact, I’m not really given the freedom to choose a lot of stuff for myself.”
Jeongguk shoots him an understanding yet sad smile and reaches to squeeze the hand that Taehyung has over his thigh.
Pad of his thumb rubbing the back of it soothingly. “I figured you haven’t,” he admits quietly. “Do you wanna talk about it or–?”
Taehyung sighs and nods his head at him. Feeling less anxious now and more open to be more truthful.
“I do,” he says. “I, uhm, actually want to tell you something.”
“Go ahead.” Jeongguk nods, sounding reassuring and gentle. “What is it?”
“It’s, it’s about my parents,” Taehyung starts, using his free hand to card his fingers through his dark brown hair.
“Uhm, as you know, they’re kind of the head at the church since my father is the pastor.”
Jeongguk hums, nodding as he listens.
“And as the pastor’s son, I’m expected of a lot of things,” Taehyung continues. “To succeed, to behave the way people want me to and so on.”
“Hence the lack of decisions for yourself?” Jeongguk suffices. More a statement than a question, making Taehyung nod at him.
“Yes,” he admits. “I’m taking careful steps because a lot of eyes are on me. You know? My parents, the church, and just, it makes me a little guarded,
a little scared to fail.”
“I understand,” Jeongguk says. “I mean, I can’t say that I relate but I get where you’re coming from, Tae. I’m sorry if that’s the case.”
Taehyung smiles at him placidly. “Yeah. I’m sorry too.” he mumbles.
Jeongguk frowns and raises an eyebrow at him. “For what?” he asks. “You didn’t do anything to me.”
“No.” Taehyung swallows. “Not yet I haven’t.”
“Huh?” Jeongguk furrows his eyebrows, sliding close to him and holding his hand properly, turning Taehyung’s hand around
so he could fill the gaps in between his fingers with his own and squeezing him tight. “I’m sorry, I’m not following.”
Taehyung closes his eyes and sighs. “I- I just feel like I’m leading you to a dead end. You and Jungkook, that is,” he says.
“Like I said, there are eyes on me all the time, Gukkie. They expect so much from me. I’ve been a member of the church even before I was born and they expect me to do stuff that I don’t even want to do but I have to.”
“Like what?” Jeongguk presses on, not letting go of him when Taehyung tried to pull his hand away. “I get that you need to succeed– which by the way, I have no doubt about, but what does that have anything to do with me? With Kook?”
“I- I can’t be gay,” Taehyung finally admits in a rush, quiet and out of breath. Starting to feel conflicted as a flood of emotions start to rise. “Or at least, they- my parents and everyone else can’t know that I am, which is unfair to you both.
You and Jungkook have been nothing but understanding with me and you’ve both done so much. It would be unkind of me to lead you on and get your hopes high, and- and maybe hide you if things escalated, then eventually pull back because I have no choice but to do so.”
Taehyung is now gasping for breath, feeling his heart race as he spills all his worries to Jeongguk. “I- shit. I don’t want to hurt any of you in the long run, Gukkie. I don’t want to put all your efforts to waste. You and Jungkook,” he continues to ramble, fist clenching until
his knuckles turn white. “I know everything is still so new, but– but shit. I’m really starting to like you. Both of you, actually, which is another problem for another day, and- and no matter how many times I try to think things through, it always ends up with one
or both of you hurt. My hands are fucking tied and I just, I just don’t know what to do to make everyone happy at this point. I- I’m lost, Gukkie. I don’t–”
“Hey,” Jeongguk says in a calm tone, reaching to unfold the lines on his forehead
and tilting his head to look at him as he watches Taehyung catch his breath. “Breathe. Okay?”
“I’m trying, I just–”
“Breathe.” Jeongguk repeats authoritatively. “C’mon Tae. Inhale.”
He sucks in breath while looking at Taehyung expectantly, indicating that he wants him
to copy him. Taehyung shakes his head. Half out of defeat, the other half out of fondness and copies him. Sucking in a deep breath before exhaling along with Jeongguk and repeating the process a few times till his breathing is even again.
“Better?” Jeongguk asks.
Taehyung smiles at him. “Better. Thanks.”
“Good.” Jeongguk nods as he smiles at him gently. Squeezing his hand tight as he looks at him seriously. “First of all, Tae. You are under no pressure, especially from me and Kook, to come out. Okay?
Seriously, it’s no issue. However this turns out, just remember that you can stay inside the closet with Kook, or me, or both of us for as long as you want. You’re not the first and you certainly won’t be the last gay person to do that.”
“But–” Taehyung tries to reason.
“Tae,” Jeongguk says firmly. “There is no pressure. Again, your pace. Remember?”
Taehyung frowns, unable to help but furrow his eyebrows. “But it’s not gonna be easy,” he reasons.
“Guk, my parents… they’ll eventually start to wonder where the wife is. They already have a few girls lined up for me to date and I can’t dodge that bullet forever.”
“I get it, Tae. I do.” Jeongguk sighs.
“But is that what you really want? I mean… you keep worrying about making other people happy but what about you? Forget about me and Kook for a minute. Forget about your parents or whoever. What do you want?”
“I-” Taehyung trails off. The other’s words sinking in as he thinks of the answer to his question. Truthfully, he knows it. It’s at the tip of his tongue, begging to be let out but Taehyung hesitates, because again, it’s not simple math.
There were just too many factors to come up with a simple solution.
It seems Jeongguk knows the things that were going on in his head since he squeezes his hand again, and cups his cheek. “What do you want, Tae?” Jeongguk asks again, more gentle yet still firm.
Looking at him intensely. “Be selfish for once and just tell me what you want.”
Taehyung sucks up a breath, closing his eyes and gathering every once of courage he has in his body and says, “You.” he licks his lips and opens his eyes. “I want you.”
“Then have me.” Jeongguk says, doe eyes meeting his almond eyes with unwavering intensity that it sends goosebumps to erupt in Taehyung’s skin. “I’m yours.”
Taehyung’s face turns red and he looks away as an attempt to hide himself. “It’s not that simple.”
“And it can’t be that complicated either.” Jeongguk counters. “You can’t make everyone happy, Tae. You’ll burn yourself out trying to do so. Instead, prioritize what you want.
All you’ve been doing is give and I really admire you for that but this is your life. Not your parents, not the church, not mine or Kook’s. Yours.”
Taehyung sighs but he doesn’t let go of the hand that Jeongguk has around his palm.
He knows that the other is making sense but he’s still conflicted and still a little afraid. He’s still dancing around the line that separates holy and unholy.
But also, it would be a disservice to himself to hold back from things, or rather– /people/ that made him happier.
He’s already given a lot of himself up to appease other people; his dream career, his time and efforts. Heck, he even has to hide his favorite artist just to keep up appearances at the church.
Surely, he’d learn to hate others and himself if he gives up love, or the likes of it, up too.
And so Taehyung lets go of that string that he’s been holding onto and surrenders. White flag and all as he looks at Jeongguk.
“What about Suji?” he asks. “I- that was what made me upset in the first place. I have to go out on a date with her and go on some trip next week.”
“Is that the girl that Jimin was telling us at the frat house a few days ago?” Jeongguk asks.
“Yeah.” Taehyung nods. “I- I don’t like her like that, just for the record, but I’m afraid that isn’t the case with her.”
“Then don’t go out on a date with her.” Jeongguk shrugs easily.
“Your mom shouldn’t control you, Tae.” Jeongguk says patiently. “Look, I’m not trying to force you to pick me or whoever, but you’re your own person and you shouldn’t let others make decisions like this for you. Not even your parents.”
“Fine.” Taehyung relents with a defeated sigh as he slumps back on his seat. “I’ll try and talk to her on that retreat and let her down gently, I guess.”
“Good.” Jeongguk nods at him approvingly.
“And again, Tae. I’m not telling you all this because it’s what I want, okay? If things change later on, if you find yourself liking her more than me or my twin, then that’s okay too. This isn’t for anyone but yourself. Okay?”
“Okay.” Taehyung says, mimicking the gentle smile that Jeongguk has on his face before the two of them turn to look at the river in front of them where the moon’s reflection is shining above its surface.
Looking tranquil despite the strong current as the quiet night accompanies them.
He feels Jeongguk slide closer to him, canceling the space separating them until there’s none and places their conjoined hands over his lap.
“Remember, you can lean on us, Tae.” he says, looking at him sincerely. “Tonight doesn’t have to change anything if you’re not ready to jump into things yet but I do hope you could trust me, trust us more. You don’t have to keep it all to yourself all the time.”
Taehyung sighs. “I know that now,” he mutters, leaning his head on the other’s shoulder as he sighs. “Thanks for the reminder.”
“I’ll remind you everyday then.” Jeongguk smiles as he looks down at him. Eyes gleaming in content, before the soft smile on his face
turns into a more playful, a more menacing grin. “However, I do want to point something out.”
“What is it?” he asks, looking at him with an eyebrow raised.
“Again, this doesn’t have to change anything and we can totally go back to how it was after tonight if that’s what you want but,” Jeongguk says, lips twitching into a smirk. “I kinda feel a little too happy at the fact that you just confessed to me.”
Taehyung blushes furiously at the mention of that. And is now starting to remember the words– the unprompted confession that he barely registered earlier due to his need for release and let go of the baggage he was carrying.
Part of him is embarrassed because he didn’t expect to spill his feelings for him. For him and his freaking brother, that is, like this. But another part is relieved that he got to say them before he chickens out like he usually does.
Still, even with his confession now out in the open there were still some things that Taehyung needs to iron out before he decides on anything.
After all, Jungkook deserves his honesty too.
“Oh shut up.” he mumbles, biting his lip and refusing to meet the other’s eyes. “I was caught up in the moment.”
“Lying is a sin, Tae.” Jeongguk teases, letting go of his hand to put an arm over Taehyung’s backrest. “But I’ll forgive you for now.”
“Thank you, Alternate name for father.” he replies blankly, using the other’s arm to cushion his head.
“Alternate what?” Jeongguk laughs, looking at him with a wide grin.
“That’s what you called yourself the other week.” Taehyung points out, raising an eyebrow at him.
Jeongguk snickers at him, a smirk appearing at the corner of his lips. “I think you got the wrong twin, baby.” he leans in and whispers it into his ear under his breath. “But if that’s what you like, I’m not opposed.”
A smack that’s similar to the one that Taehyung made back at the university’s halls echoes across the park, followed by Jeongguk wincing in pain and a quiet complaint of, “What was that for?” and back and forth bickering.
The two of them completely oblivious to the sound of a twin harley motorcycle revving away to escape.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
Jungkook couldn’t decide which was louder. The sound of the thundering bass of some hip hop song playing in the speakers along with the cheers of everyone present at the house party or the thoughts that have been running in his mind for the past couple of hours.
For some reason Jungkook is feeling restless. He can’t explain it but he can’t help but think of Taehyung. – Not that it was uncommon since he thinks about the church boy a lot, and he means a lot these days, but this time, his thoughts are accompanied with something unpleasant,
which again, is kind of odd since whenever Taehyung enters his mind in random times in the day, he usually has this stupid grin on his face.
But now he can’t help but notice that his thoughts are accompanied with this sense of foreboding. Like there’s something wrong.
Again, he can’t pinpoint as to what it is but it makes him a bit restless and a bit anxious.
The thoughts started happening at the talent show when Taehyung told him and Jeongguk that he needed to talk to them about something.
Something he suspected that his brother already knew since there was a knowing look on Jeongguk’s face when the latter met Taehyung’s eyes.
At first, Jungkook didn’t want to get ahead of himself and start to overthink. He trusts Taehyung and he trusts his brother.
Sure, he and his twin have endlessly bickered about the littlest and biggest of things from the time they both escaped their mother’s womb but he knows that underneath all that, he and Jeongguk are each other’s best friends. (Even though none of them would say it out loud.)
And in the short span of time that he got to know Taehyung, Jungkook knows that Taehyung is incapable of hurting him or his brother on purpose. Heck, Taehyung is incapable of hurting anyone. Anyone except himself, that is, since he tended to put himself last
due to his selflessness.
It’s a trait that Jungkook couldn’t decide if he likes or dislikes, because on one hand, he’d go as far as self-destruct just so he could help other people and on another, it’s one of the many reasons why he’s falling for Taehyung more and more.
He hasn’t met anyone who’s as caring and as considerate as Taehyung. And honestly, he’s surprised that Taehyung has no experience in dating or relationships because Jungkook has learned a lot from him than anyone else about what it means to really love someone.
He remembers Taehyung telling him one time that love is not about possession. It was a lesson that Jungkook had an issue in grasping at first since he tended to be possessive of the people he likes. He learned that lesson when the two of them were walking together at the quad
and he saw a couple girls eyeing them intently and giggling under their breaths when Taehyung shot them a friendly smile.
And sure, he knows the eyes were meant for them both but Jungkook felt the green eyed monster slither down his spine, and before he knew it,
he was inching close to Taehyung and was frowning at the girls and putting an arm around the other’s shoulders.
The action caught Taehyung by surprise and made a pretty blush suddenly appear on his cheeks. Something that caused Jungkook to smirk in victory,
but only for a while since Taehyung pinched his side and made him wince in pain.
“What was that for?” he whines, pierced lip jutting out.
“You know what that was for, Kookie.” Taehyung shoots him an unimpressed look as they continue to walk towards the library.
Jungkook scoffs at him. “Well, can you blame me?” he retorts. “They were shooting bedroom eyes at you. I don’t want to share.”
Taehyung sighs as they climb up the stairs together and shakes his head. “What happened to ‘you’re your own person’ huh?” he replies lightly.
“You’re really using my words against me, huh?” Jungkook snorts as they make their way to the library’s entrance. “Sue me, Tae. I know we’re just openly dating and nothing is official but I like to stake my claim. What’s mine is mine. That’s all.”
Taehyung clicks his tongue at him. Though, the blush in his cheeks is still present. “As romantic as that sound, I have to disagree with you,” he tells him calmly as they enter the library. “Love is not about who’s yours or who’s mine. It’s about trust.”
“It’s the others who I don’t trust, Tae,” Jungkook reasons. “But I do trust the people who I’m with.”
“Then that should be enough,” Taehyung replies amicably as they sit on their usual table and place their bags on the empty seats beside them.
“I think trusting the person who you’re with should be enough. Instead of saying ‘what’s mine is mine’, say ‘what’s meant for me will never be taken away.’”
Jungkook whistles. “That’s some profound bible knowledge,” he mutters teasingly.
Though he has to admit that that’s another, less toxic way of looking at it. “Any more where that came from?”
Taehyung snorts as he takes his books out of his bag. “Love is not about possession, Kook,” he says.
“Love is patient and kind, never jealous, boastful, proud, or rude. Love isn't selfish or quick tempered. It doesn't keep a record of wrongs that others do. Love rejoices in the truth, but not in evil. Love is always supportive, loyal, hopeful, and trusting. Love never fails.”
“Damn,” Jungkook replies. “Are you professing your love for me?”
Taehyung laughs. “Let’s just study,” he says with a roll of his eyes before he turns his attention to his book and begins to study.
Little does he know that Jungkook felt a little giddy at the fact that Taehyung did not deny his claim.
Honestly, Jungkook has been with a lot of people but Taehyung was just different. In the beginning, it was merely an attraction.
When Jeongguk brought Taehyung over to their shared bedroom, he remembers feeling blown off his feet due to how handsome and cute he is but then they got to talk and found his even more beautiful personality underneath all his ethereal skin and the attraction became an interest.
But then these dates happened and they got closer, and Jungkook feels like a fish on a hook. He feels like there’s no escaping his feelings anymore no matter how hard he tries. Hence, he couldn’t blame his twins for wanting Taehyung too.
He guesses that that’s one of the few cons of having a twin– having the same interests, men included.
And although he and Jeongguk have talked about it a couple times and agreed to just see how things go and let Taehyung decide, Jungkook knows that it’s going to take a while
for him to recover if Taehyung chose someone else. Whether it’s Jeongguk or someone else.
Again, he’s trying not to be possessive and trust that if they’re for each other then it will. But he’s naturally a bit possessive
and it’s kind of hard to learn new tricks after being used to something else for so long.
The frat party is in full swing with the living room now filled with dancing bodies and the dining area is now used as a beer pong tournament venue
where a few of his frat brothers were at including him. He and Namjoon are paired together against Seokjin and Hoseok. While Jeongguk, Jimin and Yoongi were somewhere on the dance floor.
He’s getting a little tipsy thanks to the beers that he’s had to drink due to Seokjin’s impressive shooting skills and Namjoon’s unimpressive ones. Plus he isn’t really concentrating too since he’s been checking his phone every 5 minutes to see if Taehyung has texted him already.
A ball falls on one of the cups in front of them, making their rivals cheer in joy and Namjoon groan frustratedly. “Hey!” the taller male elbows him on the side, drinking the beer. “Get your head in the game, Kook! They’re beating our asses!”
Jungkook sighs, pocketing his phone to look at the dining table. “Fine,” he mumbles, a bit bored. “Fix your aim too.”
Namjoon scoffs at him as he finishes his cup before throwing the ball back in Seokjin’s direction.
“You know we’ll still beat your ass even with Jungkook’s A game on.” Seokjin says with a menacing grin, throwing and catching the white ping pong ball in his hands.
Jungkook rolls his eyes at him. “Less talking and focus,” he says.
“I could tell you the same thing,” Hoseok says in a teasing tone, crossing his arms. “You’ve checked your phone a hundred times already. Who’re you waiting for? A booty call?”
“None of your business.” he replies, causing his friends to hoot at him boisterously.
“Damn, someone is whipped.”
“Is that really you?”
Jungkook rolls his eyes at them. “Again,” he says firmly, nodding at the table. “It’s none of your fucking business.”
“Do we know who it is?” Seolhyun, who’s sitting on the kitchen counter and watching them play, ask. “You’ve been out a lot lately.”
“Yeah,” Seokjin agrees with a nod. “I thought we were your friends! We should at least know who’s been stealing your time away from us.”
Jungkook snorts at them. “I’d rather keep it to myself,” he replies. “I don’t want to jinx it.”
“Wow, you really are serious.” Namjoon observes. “Jeongguk has been seeing someone too and he won’t tell us who. Is this kind of a twin thing?
The two of you single and then dating at the same time?”
“Are you dating one person?” Hoseok laughs.
Well he isn’t really wrong but he won’t say it out loud.
“Shut up.” he replies. “Just take your shot already. Geez.”
“Fine fine,” Hoseok says with a roll of his eyes, fixing his aim on one of the cups in front of him and Namjoon before throwing it. The ball misses, making him and Seokjin groan.
“This, uhm, guy?” Seolhyun asks as Jungkook picks up the ball and submerges it in water to clean it.
“Guy.” Jungkook confirms
“Yeah, so it looks pretty serious,” she continues as Jungkook walks to his side of the table “Is he boyfriend material?”
More like husband material. The type he’d bring to his mom’s grave and introduce, but he holds his tongue and shrugs at her instead.
“You’re so secretive,” Seokjin says, raising an eyebrow at him. “I mean, it’s not like you haven’t boasted about who you’re fucking with in the past.”
“Yeah I know, but he’s different. Okay?” Jungkook says irritably, causing the others to look at each other
and Seokjin to wave his hands in surrender.
“Fine.” Seokjin says. “No need to get mad.”
“And no need to be nosy.” he grumbles.
“Yah,” Seokjin says, shooting him a threatening look. “I’m your hyung. That’s no way to talk to me.”
“You can’t keep using the hyung card. It’s getting old already,” Jeongguk replies as he takes his aim on one of the cups. “Like you.”
There’s a chorus of laughter that follows Jungkook’s remark as Seokjin glares at him threateningly, but before the elder could bite back,
Jimin and Yoongi join them, looking sweaty and haggard due to the dancing.
He watches Jimin fling himself on Hoseok’s back and hugs him tight. “What’s so funny?” Jimin asks as he reaches for one of the beers on the table and downs it in one go.
“Just Jin hyung and Kook going at it again,” Hoseok says, looking over his shoulder to smile at his boyfriend. “You smell like alcohol. Take it easy on the drinks, babe.”
Jimin sighs at him. “You’re no fun like Yoongi hyung.” he pouts.
“To be fair, you drank twice as much as me and Guk combined,” Yoongi replies as he sits next to Seolhyun on the kitchen counter.
“Speaking of Jeongguk, where is he?” Namjoon asks, watching as Jungkook aims the ping pong ball on one of the red cups.
“He went out,” Jimin replies with a yawn, resting his head on Hoseok’s shoulder. “He got a call from someone and dipped as soon as he hung up. I guess it’s his mystery lover boy again.”
Jungkook misses the shot, causing Namjoon to groan.
He ignores him, though, and goes to check his phone to see if Taehyung called him too, only to see no notifications from him. Jungkook frowns and looks up to find that his friends were still talking about his brother.
“–he’s worse than ever,” Yoongi was saying. “I don’t think I’ve seen this whipped. He wasn’t even like this with Seoeun”
“You know how Jeongguk is,” Seokjin replies as he aims the ball on Namjoon and Jungkook’s cups. “He’s the hopeless romantic kind. It’s not new.”
“True.” Hoseok nods. “But you know what’s new? Jungkook being whipped for someone too.”
Jungkook rolls his eyes. “We’re back at it again, huh?” he mutters, trying to act cool but is already eager to follow his twin out to wherever so he could be with Taehyung too.
“Again, we haven’t seen you like this before,” Namjoon says. “We’re just happy you have someone now. That’s all.”
“It’s nothing official.” Jungkook shrugs. Not yet, he hopes. “So stop jinxing it already. Sheesh.”
“Fine fine,” Seolhyun says amicably, waving a hand at them. “Let’s stop before Kook gets annoyed some more. Anyway, is Taehyung coming today? I still want to thank him for squeezing me in the show!”
“You should buy him a coffee or something,” Yoongi tells her.
“Share some of your first prize money.”
“I think I will,” she replies with a smile. “I owe Somi too since she helped me compose my piece.”
“Where is Som, by the way?” Namjoon asks, catching the ball that Seokjin didn’t shoot and starting to aim on the cups.
“She’s at the dorm,” Seolhyun says. “She has a project due Monday and she hasn’t started yet.”
“Is that the one for Professor Song?” Seokjin asks before he groans when Namjoon managed to shoot the ping pong ball on one of their cups.
“Yeah,” she replies. “We got busy with the talent show and she pushed it back to the last minute.”
“I think you owe Som more than a coffee then,” Hoseok says.
“Yeah.” Seolhyun sighs. “I guess I could take her and Taehyung out for Korean barbeque instead.”
“But wait, where is Tae?” Hoseok asks, looking at Jimin. “Did he say that he was coming?”
“I don’t think he is,” Jimin answers as he pulls back from Hoseok’s back and joins Yoongi and Seolhyun at the countertop.
“He texted me after the talent show. He says he has to go have dinner with his parents and the judges.”
Namjoon hums from beside him. “That’s the pastor, right?” he asks. Jimin nods at him. “That must be quite something.”
Jimin snorts at him. “Pastor Kim isn’t too bad,” he mutters. “Mrs. Kim, Tae’s mom, though.. She’s something else.”
“I can imagine,” Seolhyun replies with a sad smile. “Somi has told me so much about church life, and I don’t know. It’s enough for me to stay away honestly.”
“I’m glad my parents aren’t too extreme in their faith.” Hoseok nods. “The rest are too much, though. I mean, you all see how Tae’s been working his ass off with the church’s extracurriculars.”
“Yeah, I have,” Seokjin says.
“I guess he has to since his parents are the head of the church.”
“Yeah, that’s true.” Jimin sighs sadly. “But I think he kinda likes some of the tasks and he’s naturally so helpful too so I think he doesn’t mind.”
“He should, though,” Jungkook says, grabbing the ping pong ball from Namjoon and shooting it inside the second to the last cup. “He has to put himself first.”
“You and Tae have gotten close lately,” Yoongi says, looking at him. “Is he the one you’re seeing now?”
Jungkook nearly lets go of the ping pong ball in his hand as looks at Yoongi. He tries to school his face to look nonchalant. Though, he can feel his nape heating at the accusation.
Thankfully he doesn’t have to reply since Jimin snorts at him. “Don’t be daft, Yoongi hyung,” he says, rolling his eyes. “Taehyung already has someone.”
“Someone?” Jungkook asks.
“Yeah, didn’t he tell you?” Jimin says, looking at him. “He’s seeing someone right now.”
Jungkook hums. Again, trying not to act too suspicious and not trying to get ahead of himself and trust Taehyung.
In retrospect, it could mean that Taehyung referred to him and Jeongguk, but then again, Jimin doesn’t know that Taehyung’s gay so he has doubts about that.
“Guess he didn’t say,” he mumbles. Feeling uneasy as he shoots the ball at the last cup,
indicating his and Namjoon’s victory.
“Yeah, he’s dating our church mate. Her name’s Suji,” Jimin tells him as he watches Seokjin and Hoseok finish the remaining beers on the table. “I thought you two were close these days. Didn’t he say?”
Jungkook shrugs. “Maybe he missed it.” he replies.
“Or maybe Taehyung isn’t that serious about her,” Seolhyun interjects. “I asked him about her the other day and he seems dismissive about the topic.”
“He’s been texting her nonstop the last few days,” Jimin says. “I think it’s pretty serious.”
“Let’s just see how it goes.” Hoseok says, grimacing as he drinks the beer. “Anyway, wanna play another round?”
“I’m game!” Seolhyun says, jumping from the counter. “Wanna team up with me Yoongi?”
The conversation then shifts into splitting teams for another round of beer pong but Jungkook doesn’t pay it too mind since he’s now fully distracted over the topic of Taehyung apparently
seeing someone else without bothering to tell him about it.
He’s trying his best not to water the seed of doubt that was planted in his head. Trust and all, but he’s growing more and more restless and he knows that the only way to stomp these feelings down
is if he talks to Taehyung about it.
“Hey, where are you going?” Namjoon asks, watching him walk towards the exit. “Don’t you wanna play some more?”
“I’m gonna go meet Guk,” Jungkook replies. “See you guys later.”
And without waiting for a response, he makes his way to the front door and towards the garage where his motorcycle is. Its twin missing, indicating that Jeongguk used it to probably meet up with Taehyung.
He frowns as he grabs his helmet and puts it on, pulling his phone out to call Jeongguk but after a few attempts, he settles with checking his brother’s location through their app and finds him pulling up near Han River Park.
Jungkook wastes no time and climbs on his motorcycle, the sound of its engine revving loudly before he drives off to that direction. He’s trying his best to stay level headed and focus on driving, but as time ticks by the feeling of uneasiness gets more and more intense
as questions begin to cloud his mind.
Why didn’t Taehyung tell him about Suji? Why did Jeongguk tell him about it too? Why did Taehyung call Jeongguk and not him?
He starts to feel self conscious as he picks up speed, bypassing a couple cars until he reaches the Han River Park and finds his brother’s motorcycle parked at the parking lot.
Jungkook parks next to it and climbs out of his bike, taking his helmet off and checking his phone to see where his brother’s ping is so he could go to them and ask them these questions himself.
Again, he wants to give Taehyung and his brother the benefit of the doubt. They’ve been honest and open to each other these last few weeks, and perhaps, Taehyung may have felt a little afraid of telling them, or rather him, about that girl since Jeongguk seemed to know.
Still, he can’t help but feel hurt and a little betrayed as he finds the two of them sitting together at the bench they sat all those weeks ago. He frowns when he sees their hands holding each other and was about to call their names but he stops at the last second
when he hears his brother say–
“–Forget about me and Kook for a minute. Forget about your parents or whoever. What do you want?” Jeongguk was asking Taehyung, the two of them oblivious of him.
Jungkook halts, raising an eyebrow as he wonders what this was about. Is this about the girl? Or something else. He hears Taehyung stutter for a second before Jeongguk leans close to him and cups Taehyung’s cheek.
“What do you want, Tae?” Jeongguk asks. Looking at Taehyung intensely. “Be selfish for once and just tell me what you want.”
He watches as Taehyung sucks up a deep breath and closes his eyes before he says, “You. I want you.”
Jungkook freezes as he tries to process the words that Taehyung had said. Part of him wants to interrupt their moment, be a little selfish and clarify if it meant that Taehyung has decided to choose Jeongguk over him and that girl.
But there’s another part of him that’s aching. A part close to his chest. It’s funny how he’s experienced fracturing his ankle and got a few nasty cuts when he fell from his motorcycle once, but this felt much worse.
Jungkook has never had his heart broken before but he guesses that there’s a first for everything. And the thing is, he wonders why it is in the first place when things are still fairly new and nothing is official.
He and Jeongguk both agreed that if Taehyung ended up choosing one over the other, then it wouldn’t be a big deal. But that was before the dates and kind smiles and the lessons in love.
It was before Jungkook fell for Taehyung completely.
Jungkook decides to take the time to regroup himself and turn around to go back to his bike. He tells himself to talk to Taehyung some other day. When he isn’t feeling as hurt as he is now and when he isn’t on the verge of exploding his messy feelings at him.
He climbs his bike and drives. His route is directionless and he’s zipping past buildings at full speed. He doesn’t even register where he ended up but he finds himself back at the university dormitories and goes to climb out of his bike and enter one of the buildings.
Soon he stops by one of the doors and knocks at it timidly, checking his watch to see that it’s past two in the morning already and hopes that person he’s visiting is still awake.
Somi answers the door a few minutes later, looking wide awake and with her eyebrows furrowed. “Oh,” she says, leaning on the doorway and crossing his arms. “Didn’t expect to see you here tonight.”
Jungkook only sighs as he cards his fingers through his hair. “I kinda need you tonight.” he says.
Somi pushes the door open wide to let him in. “Come in.” she says.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
Three days have passed since the talent show, and Taehyung can finally say that he can breathe properly now since his tasks have decreased and the class that he was having trouble trying to ace is getting fairly better due to his studying.
He now has more downtime compared to the last few days and it’s the breather he’s been needing to have since his hellish week. He’s been spending it mostly with Jimin if his best friend wasn’t busy with his own school work
and Jeongguk, who has been stuck to his hip since they both confessed that night.
Something that he was both happy and a bit conflicted about. Happy, since although Jeongguk knows that he likes him (and his brother) now, things haven’t really changed between the two of them
(except for the soft smiles that they’d exchange when they find the other staring back) and a bit conflicted because although Jeongguk makes him feel giddy, he’s still can’t really feel all too happy about it because of Jungkook.
He’s been trying to get some alone time with the elder since the day after the night Taehyung confessed his secrets to Jeongguk, and it’s proving to be hard since Jungkook was either busy doing some schoolwork and is locking himself in his bedroom
when Taehyung came to visit or was out with someone. Specifically Somi.
Taehyung is trying not to read into things. He promises that he’s not. He wants to choose to trust Jungkook and trust that he’d tell him something that he’s supposed to know,
but he can’t help but have this feeling of uneasiness settle in the pit of his stomach whenever he sees them together.
The first time was after the talent show. Taehyung dropped by the frat house with Jimin to do another mini celebration of Seolhyun and Jimin’s victory
at the talent show with a few drinks. Everyone was there except for Jungkook, who was up in his room studying according to Jeongguk. He went to his room to try and see if he could talk to Jungkook there, but wasn’t very successful since the elder looked a bit stressed and tired,
and wasn’t very responsive when Taehyung tried to converse with him.
Taehyung told himself that it was nothing. That it was okay to have off days since he had those himself and wished Jungkook luck on his assignments before going down to rejoin the others.
But soon, Somi joined them later on after finishing her own projects and climbed up to go check on Jungkook like he did.
A few minutes later, she and Jungkook climbed down the stairs together with Jungkook looking less stressed compared to before and joined their group
for a while. In hindsight, things seemed normal. Jungkook didn’t ignore him when he’d talk to him, he laughed when Seokjin would crack a joke, and Taehyung even caught him staring at him once but looked away at the last minute.
But there was just something off about it. Like it isn't as sincere as it was compared to before, and his urge to go talk to Jungkook just grew even stronger.
After a while, Jungkook excused himself. Saying he has to go finish more of his school stuff, then turned to Somi
to ask if they were still on for tomorrow, to which Somi said that she is before he went back to his room.
No one really gave too much thought about it. Taehyung knows he shouldn’t too since they’ve all been good friends already before he joined their group,
but there’s this whisper in his ear that’s convincing him to overthink. To begin to doubt.
But Taehyung didn’t allow that voice to get to him and convinced himself that all is well, and perhaps, Jungkook just wasn’t feeling it today and promised that when things seemed back
to normal or when Jungkook wasn’t stressed, he’d talk to him immediately.
The next day arrived, which was a church day and while Taehyung was on the way back to the dorms, he saw Jungkook and Somi hanging out at the soccer field with Somi sitting in the bleachers
watching Jungkook practice.
He wanted to approach them and ask them how they were but he hesitated. Again, the feeling that something seemed off crawled through his skin especially when Jungkook met his eyes and waved at him in a seemingly halfhearted fashion, causing Somi to
look at him and nod. The two of them not bothering to invite him over unlike before, thus making Taehyung wave back at them before he heads back to his dorm.
And now, he’s currently in the library with Jeongguk. The two of them, or rather Taehyung, studying
since Jeongguk was laying his head on the table, half asleep and with books forgotten underneath him.
He sees Jungkook come into the library. Taehyung was just about to raise his hand and invite him over but Seolhyun and Somi entered behind him, making him retract and watch
as Jungkook looks at him and nods before he and the girls disappear into one of the aisles.
Taehyung frowns. “Gukkie,” he says, looking at Jeongguk who was still dozing off.
“Yeah?” Jeongguk replies sleepily.
“Is Jungkook mad at me?” he asks, fidgeting in his seat as looks at the direction of the aisle where Jungkook disappeared to.
“He didn’t mention anything to me.” Jeongguk yawns, sitting up straight and stretching. “Why? Did he say he was mad?”
“No, not really,” Taehyung replies. “Just- just a gut feeling.”
“Don’t worry,” he says reassuringly. “He’s just stressed with school. He barely talks to me too if that makes you feel better.”
Taehyung raises an eyebrow at that. “He’s been hanging out a lot with Somi these days too,” he says in what he hopes is a nonchalant tone.
Jeongguk, as always, catches on and smirks at him. “You jealous?” he teases, causing Taehyung to scoff at him.
Though the tip of his ears turn a shade of red, making Jeongguk laugh. “Chill, Tae. We’ve been friends for a long time already. I don’t think there’s anything going on between them.”
“Regardless if there’s nothing going on or there is, he’s free to do whatever,” Taehyung replies. Though the words leave a bitter taste in his mouth. “I mean, I like him too as you know, but we’re not together so he’s still free to go out with whoever he wants to.”
“True.” Jeongguk nods. “But I know him. Trust me.”
Taehyung only smiles at him but it doesn’t reach his eyes. Jeongguk sighs and holds his hand. “If it’s bothering you, I can talk to him,” he offers.
“No, you don’t have to,” Taehyung says instantly.
“I’m sure I’m just overthinking. And like you said, Kook is stressed with school. I don’t want to add to it.”
Taehyung nods. “I’m sure.” he smiles at him reassuringly. “I’m sure he’ll come around.”
Jeongguk smiles back. “Yeah, I’m sure of it too.” he replies.
“Sure of what?” a third voice interrupts, causing Taehyung to pull his hand out of Jeongguk’s grip in panic and turn to the direction of where the voice came from.
Seolhyun is looking at them with a knowing smile. “Am I interrupting something?” she asks.
“No. Not at all!” Taehyung squeaks, gesturing towards one of the empty seats in their table. “Would you like to join us?”
Seolhyun pulls a seat and sits down on one of the chairs. “Sure, but only for a bit. I’m studying with Som and Kook today,” she replies.
“I’m actually here for you, Tae.”
“Oh?” Taehyung asks. “For what?”
“Well, I haven’t thanked you properly yet for letting me join the competition,” she says brightly. “So I was wondering if you wanted to go grab some dinner tomorrow.”
“Are you trying to ask him out on a date again?” Jeongguk asks. Tone a bit bitter, making Taehyung glare at him.
Seolhyun, thankfully, doesn’t catch his tone and scoffs at Jeongguk playfully. “I’ve been denied by Tae twice already, Guk!” she says.
“Do you really think I’d hurt my own ego and get denied for a third?”
“I think you’re really nice, though, Seol.” Taehyung tells her with a shy smile. “Please don’t take it the wrong way.”
Seolhyun rolls her eyes at him lightly. “You’re too nice, Taehyungie,” she comments. “And don’t worry about it. I’m already seeing this guy so I’ve moved on and if you do change your mind about dating me, though, I’m afraid you’ve missed your chance.”
at her dramatic tone. “I’m sure that will keep me awake at night.” he jokes, making Seolhyun laugh.
“Anyway, it’s not a date so calm your tits, Jeon,” Seolhyun says. “I just want to thank Tae for letting me join the show. Plus Somi’s joining us so it’s hardly intimate.”
It isn’t intimate, yes. But Taehyung could not help but feel a bit uneasy.
“You don’t really have to, Seol. I’m sure you can use the money for something else,” Taehyung says with a grateful smile. “And besides, it was all Kook and Guk.”
“And I’ve already made it up to them by buying them drinks yesterday,” Seolhyun retorts. “So it’s your turn now!”
“I think it won’t hurt to go,” Jeongguk says, looking at him encouragingly. “I think you’d enjoy it, Tae.”
“I know you would!” Seolhyun nods eagerly.
“C’mon Tae. Please! I promise I won’t flirt with you every five minutes!”
Taehyung snorts. “Fine,” he mumbles, still a little wary but excited nonetheless. “I’d love to go. Thank you, Seol.”
Seolhyun grins at him brightly.
“Yay! I’m excited!” she says, standing up and hugging him tight. “I’ll text you all the details later, Tae! See you!”
She waves at him and Jeongguk goodbye and stalks off to where Jungkook and Somi were waiting for her at the exit.
The two of them watching their exchange and waving at them goodbye once Seolhyun rejoins them.
Taehyung watches the trio leave together and talk amongst themselves until they’re out of view and goes to look at Jeongguk who had his eyebrows scrunching, eyes watching the spot
where the three disappeared to.
Jeongguk hums. “That’s strange,” he says, looking at Taehyung. “Kook didn’t even stop by to say hi.”
It’s Taehyung’s turn to try and reassure him. “Like you said, he’s a bit stressed with school.” he tries.
Jeongguk frowns and looks down on his books, eyebrows still scrunching. “Yeah, right,” he mumbles as he grabs his pen and begins to study. “That must be it.”
Taehyung only smiles at him. Though the unsettling feeling returns and makes him worried.
Again, he’s trying not to overthink and trust Jungkook.
But then again, his gut feelings were never wrong.
⬖ ⬘ ⬗ ⬙
Taehyung meets Seolhyun and Somi the next day after all his classes are done.
They’re at a newly opened K-Barbeque place near the university, where the restaurant has an outdoor theme. The serving area is located outside the restaurant where beds of flowers surround it
and lanterns swayed above the tables since the indoor area served more as the kitchen and payment area.
Taehyung and the girls are seated at a far table. It’s still early evening with the sun setting at the horizon, emitting a soft pink and orange glow that matches the lanterns
above them and the coals that were cackling in the grill as Taehyung cooks the meat for the three of them.
Surprisingly, things weren’t as tense as Taehyung made them out to be. He was hesitant at first in coming because not only was he feeling a bit apprehensive about Jungkook
and Somi spending more time together, but also because Somi tended to act indifferent with him when they used to meet up in the past.
He likes to think that Somi’s indifference towards him wasn’t personal since she never really acted rude to him, except for the time when
they first met, and she’d always greet him with either a nod of her head or a wave when they’d cross each other’s paths in the university grounds.
He asked Jimin about it once, and his best friend reassured him that Somi was just a bit introverted and shy with new people she
wasn’t close with. And said once she warms up to him, he’d get to know her good side. Something that Taehyung hopes to accomplish today.
Seolhyun and Somi were already seated at the venue by the time he arrived. And once he came up to their table, Taehyung was surprised to see Somi pull up a chair for him next to her and gestured at him to sit there, to which he did, before she asked him how he was.
There was even a point when Seolhyun had to leave to place their order inside, leaving the two of them at the table. Taehyung initially felt a little uneasy since Seolhyun was good at breaking the ice between him and Somi, but felt his uneasiness vanish when Somi complimented
his outfit and asked him where he got it, before their conversation shifted from clothes to famous brands and designers, models, art and so on until Seolhyun rejoined them. Happy to see the two of them getting along.
Taehyung was surprised to find that he and Somi had a lot of similarities during the short time they bonded together, with the two of them being introverts at first but friendly once they’re more comfortable, the random things like clothes and brands that they liked, and
even that connection with the church because of Somi’s step dad.
Plus the fact that Somi likes the twins too, a voice whispers in his head, that had Taehyung shaking his head. Refusing to let his prejudice hinder him from getting to know her better.
After all, there must be a reason why everyone– Jimin, the twins, and the rest of the guys were close with her.
And it proved to be easy since once the three of them were more settled and began to eat, Taehyung finds that he’s quite enjoying himself.
Forgetting about his hesitations earlier as he laughs along to Seolhyun telling them about a scandal between the drama club’s advisor and the dean of the Art department.
“–I shit you not,” Seolhyun was saying with her mouth half-full, hands gesturing at them wildly. “When Professor Song came in for class today, he had ASG.”
“ASG?” Taehyung asks as he flips the meat over and furrows his eyebrows at her curiously. “What’s that?”
“After Sex Glow,” Somi answers with a sly smirk, tone teasing as she looks at Taehyung who’s cheeks begin to flush. “You’re a pre-med student, Tae. You should know that.”
“I guess I skipped the lesson,” Taehyung replies with a shy smile. “Mind explaining how that works?”
“Well during sex–” Somi begins to explain.
“Call it intercourse,” Seolhyun chides lightly, grinning at Taehyung playfully. “Don’t teach Tae-tae bad things!”
Somi rolls her at Seolhyun lightly.
“Okay, then during intercourse, your body produces happy hormones or endorphins,” Somi says as she grabs some lettuce and puts beef over it. “A rush of it makes your skin glow since oxygen is emanating out of your skin.”
“Plus the sweat makes your skin even more shinier,” Seolhyun adds with a smirk. “I highly recommend it if you want to have brighter skin. I usually f–”
“Shut up, babe,” Somi cuts her off with a laugh as she looks at a flustered Taehyung.
“You just said you didn’t want to taint Tae.”
“Right,” Seolhyun giggles, shooting Taehyung an apologetic yet amused smile. “Sorry Tae. TMI.”
“You’re okay.” Taehyung smiles at her timidly as he adds more meat on his and the girls’ plates
and adds the last of their meat on the grill to cook. “I know I may be a church kid and all but you don’t have to filter yourselves around me. I won’t judge you.”
“That’s a first,” Somi says, tone a little biting, but Taehyung could tell that it wasn’t directed at him
but something else. He thinks it’s towards the church, which he’s now starting to understand was a sensitive topic around Somi.
Somi notices him falling silent and sighs. “I’m doing it again, aren’t I? Being a bitch?” she asks.
“Sorry babe. I don’t really have a good relationship with the church. I promise it’s nothing personal.”
“Yeah.” Seolhyun nods, smiling at Taehyung reassuringly. “Trust me, Tae. Somi isn’t wary of you anymore.”
“Geez, way to expose me there, Seol.” Somi says, shooting Taehyung
a small smile. “Again, it’s not towards you but the church. I was only wary because I’ve met a bunch of church people who were all the same. I was just cautious.”
“I understand,” Taehyung replies, feeling a bit better now that Somi was opening up.
“And I’m sorry if you’ve met a couple, uh, church people who weren't as nice.”
“It’s okay. You have nothing to apologize for.” Somi waves at him. “I should be the one who should apologize since I wasn’t really welcoming, but Kook told me stuff about you that changed my mind too.
So it’s a little late, but sorry for being cold back then.”
Jungkook talks about him with Somi? The information oddly makes his heart content.
“It’s water under the bridge and I didn’t mind it too much at first,” Taehyung says. “We’re friends now. Right?”
Somi smiles at him shyly. “I guess we are.” she replies, making Taehyung happy.
“Oh but speaking of Kookie,” Seolhyun interrupts, looking at Somi with a smirk. “I couldn’t help but notice that you’re way closer these days. Is there something that I should know?”
Suddenly the happiness that Taehyung felt slightly wavered as he watched Somi shoot Seolhyun a half-hearted smile. “I don’t kiss and tell. You know that.” she says.
Seolhyun proceeds to make teasing sounds as she playfully shoves Somi in the side
while Taehyung tries to school his face to look blank as he tries to think of what Somi meant by that. It could possibly be just an expression; something that wasn’t meant in a literal sense, but his brain starts to accelerate with a thousand thoughts.
Is this why Jungkook is kind of avoiding him? Because he’s interested in Somi now?
Are they together? Is he over Taehyung now?
Why won’t he just tell him?
Taehyung’s lips involuntarily frown as questions flood his head. On one hand, he knows he shouldn’t feel hurt since
he’s keeping things from Jungkook too. But on the other hand, he wishes Jungkook would just approach him like he usually does and be honest with him too. Rip the band-aid off so he could go lick his wounds.
It seems Somi senses his discomfort since she looks at him
and raises a curious eyebrow up. “You good, Tae?” she asks. “You went quiet there for a second.”
Taehyung tries to smile, licking his lips as a nervous tick, and proceeds to flip the meat on the grill as a lack of anything to do. “Yeah.” he nods. “I zoned out for a bit. Sorry.”
Seolhyun giggles at him and proceeds to tease him. Somi just shoots him a blank yet perceptive look before she makes another lettuce wrap for herself, choosing to be silent.
“And speaking of love life, Tae. How’s yours?” Seolhyun asks.
“I heard things with the church girl were getting serious.”
“Oh.” Taehyung gulps. “Uhm. Well, it’s not really as serious as you guys think. We’re just going out on this one date. That’s all.”
“If you’re going on a date then that’s serious. Silly!” Seolhyun retorts
as she refills their cups with juice. “I mean, why would you ask her if you weren’t?”
“My mom wanted me to,” Taehyung admits shyly, making both girls pause and look at him with their eyebrows meeting.
“I know it doesn’t sound good but I’m trying my best not to get her hopes up so I could let her down gently.”
“Jimin seemed to think that you’re serious about her,” Seolhyun says. “Didn’t you tell him about that yet?”
Right. He hasn’t.
Mainly because he was worried that Jimin would do something stupid like confront his mother, and make the latter separate them and pull him out of university.
“Uh, I guess he ships us.” he shrugs.
Somi snorts. “I bet he wouldn’t if you told him the truth, babe.” she says, a little firmer than usual. “You don’t want this to bite your ass.”
“Right,” Taehyung says uncomfortably as he scratches the side of his neck. “I’m working on it. It’s just– well, it’s complicated.”
Somi meets his eyes, the corner of her lips twitching into a small yet sad smile. “I understand,” she says. “You’re forgetting I’m kind of a church kid too. I know it could get complicated.”
And for some reason Taehyung feels slightly comforted at that.
It’s nice to know that he has someone who actually knows what it feels like to be in his shoes. Sure, he has Jimin and Hoseok, but both his friends really didn’t care that much about church and their parents weren’t as radical in their beliefs compared to Taehyung’s parents.
Somi on the other hand, who’s stepdad is very active and whose faith is as radical as his parents, seems like she actually gets Taehyung and he’s starting to think that her animosity towards the church comes from a place of experience.
He wonders what that experience is, though, and hopes they grow closer for him to know in the future.
The three of them soon leave the restaurant with their bellies full and walk towards the direction of the university together.
Taehyung, as the gentleman he is, walks the girls to their dorm to make sure they get home safe. Earning him a friendly kiss on the cheek from Seolhyun before she giggles and runs inside. Saying, “I’m not washing my lips tonight!” playfully before she disappears from sight.
Somi rolls her eyes at her. “Don’t worry,” she says, hands inside her coat’s jacket. “She did that to Joon too when they first met.”
“She’s very affectionate.” Taehyung smiles politely as he stands in front of her and bounces in his steps.
A soft smile appears on Somi’s face as she looks over her shoulder to where Seolhyun disappeared to. “Yeah I know, I love her for it, though.” she replies before turning to face him again. “Anyway, it was nice spending time with you, Tae. We should do this more often.”
“Yeah.” Taehyung nods at her. “I enjoyed it too. Tell Seolhyun thank you for the meal.”
“I will,” Somi replies, reaching to squeeze his arm before she turns to go back to the dorms.
Taehyung was just about to head to his own dorm and was just turning around to go
but he heard Somi call his name again, making him look with his eyebrows furrowed curiously to find her brushing a hand through her blonde locks as she smacks her lips.
“Uh yeah?” he asks.
Somi looks at him, eyes looking slightly confrontational but it’s not in a way that wants to fight, but in a way that looks like she wants to tell and ask him something important.
She was just opening her mouth to say something when Taehyung felt someone pat him on the back,
making him and Somi look to find Jungkook there with a bucket hat on his head, dressed in a black parka, sweats and sliders on.
“Hey Tae,” he says, nodding at him and placing his hands in his parka’s pockets. “How are you?”
“Oh, Kook–” Taehyung says, looking at him with wide, hopeful eyes. “I’m good. What about you?”
Jungkook shrugs at him nonchalantly. “I’m good too.” he replies before looking over at Somi’s direction. “Hey Som. Did you get my text?”
“Sorry Kook,” Somi replies. “I was out with Tae and Seol. What’s up?”
“Nothing much,” he tells her. “Wanna go to mine? Guk’s out practicing for a practical test or something.”
“Oh, uh, okay,” Somi says slowly, sounding a little hesitant before she tells him to wait for her
since she’s gonna grab some school stuff from her dorm, then heads inside the building.
Taehyung starts to feel uncomfortable, which again, is odd. He has never felt this way around any of the twins before and as far he knows, there’s no reason for the two of them to act
indifferent towards each other. He decided to take the chance and talk to Jungkook. Get this out of the way before it escalates even further, but before Taehyung could open his mouth, Jungkook beats him to it.
“Heard you’re going out on a date with some girl called Suji, Tae,” Jungkook tells him, making Taehyung freeze and heart stop as he looks at the other with wide eyes.
Jungkook’s tone sounded nonchalant and a bit airy. Like he isn’t bothered by it, but Taehyung knows him long enough to recognize the hurt underneath it that makes him feel guilty.
He opens his mouth, an apology at the tip of his tongue, but Jungkook only tilts his chin in a playful yet gentle manner as the corner of his pierced lip twist into a small smile. “Don’t look too scared,” he says. “I’m not mad.”
“You- you aren’t?” he asks.
Jungkook shrugs, hands back inside his pocket. “Nope.” he replies. “I just wondered why you haven’t bothered to tell me before. That’s all.”
“I- I wanted to,” Taehyung tells him apologetically. “I tried to talk to you these last couple of days but you were a little busy.”
“Yeah.” Jungkook nods. “Uni has been kicking my ass these past few days.”
Taehyung hums. He wants to point out that Uni didn’t seem to kick his butt whenever Somi was around, but holds his tongue instead as he nods at him. “I’ve noticed,” he mumbles.
“I’m sure Guk has been keeping you company, though. Right?” Jungkook asks. Again, sounding casual but there’s something else– something that Taehyung cannot pinpoint that tells him something else. “I’ve seen you two getting cozy these last few days. I suppose you’re happy?”
Taehyung furrows his eyebrows at him. He doesn’t really understand why Jungkook sounds a little hostile even after he said that he wasn’t bothered about him going out with Suji, and why he’s acting a little bitter towards him and Jeongguk.
“I- I’m happy I guess?” Taehyung replies, sounding a bit unsure. “I mean, we hangout like we usually do and nothing has really changed between me and Guk.”
Jungkook hums at him in understanding, but he still sounds a little unconvinced.
“Right,” Jungkook mumbles, nodding at him slowly. “Well, don’t let me stop you from changing that, Tae. Okay? It’s your choice, after all.”
“Huh?” Taehyung asks, getting more and more confused. “What’s that supposed to–”
But before he could finish, Somi reappears with her
school bag and has changed her clothes to some sweats and a hoodie. “Sorry babe, I was looking for my laptop charger all over the dorm,” she says, hands carrying some textbooks and looks up to find them in the same spot she left them. “Oh, hey Tae. I thought you already left.”
“I- I just was.” Taehyung shoots her a tight lipped smile before turning to look at Jungkook who has a blank look on his face. “I guess I’ll see you later, then?”
“Sure,” Jungkook replies with a nod as he retrieves the books from Somi’s hands and carries them for her.
“Want me to walk you home?”
“Uh no need,” Taehyung replies. “I can get home myself, thanks.”
Jungkook nods at him slowly. “Okay. Text m–, Text Guk when you get home.” he says before gesturing to Somi towards the direction of the frat house. “See you later, Tae.”
“I- see you.” Taehyung mumbles under his breath, watching as Jungkook and Somi walk towards the frat house side by side and hearing them laugh together as they bumped each other’s sides.
Feeling like he’s outside a locked house looking through boarded windows, with no way to get inside. He wants to chase after them– chase after Jungkook and demand answers as to why he’s acting distant but he knows he has no right to do so.
So he walks away. Steps, chest and baggage feeling a little heavier than usual. Not seeing the way Somi looked at him and Jungkook with her eyebrows furrowed and a question floating around her mind. Oblivious to the dots that she was slowly connecting.
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